I have a new one! Petition Lady.


Well, maybe not a true denizen but a funny pool story. The Y has 2 pools joined together. One is a shallow area good for water walking and kids playing. The other is a 4 lap pool. It used to be that 1 hour after opening the lane closest to the small/shallow pool would flip to water walking for those that wanted to get into some deeper water. This made a lot of sense, because now the water walking lane and small/shallow pool were contiguous. After it being like this for years, one of the walkers decided that the fan that keeps the life guards cool made her too cold when she was in the water walking lane. She asked them to turn it off. The life guards didn't turn it off. She started a petition and strong armed her fellow walkers into signing. I even saw her carrying the paper/pen in the pool at one point to get another signature. The result? When the Y published their next pool schedule the water walking lane was shifted to the other side of the pool. It is now the side farthest away from the fan and the small/shallow pool everyone hangs out in waiting for deeper water. Now when the water walking lane gets opened those that want to use it need to exit the pool, walk down the deck and then back into the pool from a different set of stairs. AFAIK she has not yet started a petition to get the old lane back.

So today at the pool I was the only one there and swimming in the middle lane (of 5). Others had come and gone. I get to the edge of the pool and I see a set of fins and a kickboard, but I didn't see a person. I swam another 50 came back and still nobody in that lane. Then I noticed him. He had walked all the way to the other end of the pool and was doing a warm up routine on the deck at the other end of the pool. He started with arm swings which is reasonable. Then he did some squats, then walked over to a wall and did some calf stretches. Then walked to a different wall to do some more. Then he stood there for a moment, before moving to the yoga "tree pose" position. He finished by bowing in all four directions. I was just memorized by the whole routine.

He then gets into the pool on that end and proceeds to do elementary backstroke slowly down the lane.

I finished the last of my set and got out. He then moved over into my lane.

One of the strangest things I have seen at my pool.

I tumble-turned into someone a few months back. I saw him on the right hand side of the lane (down here in OZ), so I stayed on the left, and he literally walked across the end of the lane just as I was about to turn - right into my path...then he got quite nasty. He got even angrier when I stayed calm.

That kind of stuff drives me batty. A week ago some guy is at the pool doing 50 m sprints with a snorkel. For some reason he decides to launch into a sprint when I am about 5 m off the wall from behind me. He was taking like at least 2 min between sprints so why he didn't just shorten it a bit and go first I don't know. Anyway he passes me about 5 m from the end of the lane cuts in front of me and does a tumble turn from the side of the lane we are swimming in instead of going over so he won't hit me. I stay as far right as I can but he bumps me and comes up about 5 metres down the lane coughing and upset that we collided.

Like your case I think he got more upset because I mumbled a quick apology (I am Canadian) and moved on.

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They constantly try to escape from the darkness outside and within
Dreaming of systems so perfect that no one will need to be good T.S. Eliot

Deep meditation guy- admittedly I typically get to the pool early (have to be done before the 5:30 AM masters), but there's a guy who gets there about the same time as I do, he picks his lane and then proceeds to sit next to his lane meditating for quite some time! Long enough that I can do a 800 yard WU before he even actually gets in! No stretching...just sitting there. Maybe he's sleeping while sitting up???

I had an old woman ask to share a lane with me after she saw me doing fast sets. There were two other lanes that just had 1 person in them dragging along like beach whales and she chooses mine. So I mumbled sure in an unhappy manner and she would do the same thing. Sit at the walls and I would have to flip-turn around her. Its like GTFO, how can you be this oblivious. I eventually swapped with another woman sharing a lane, but I'd be damned if I am modifying the entire reason I drove there in the first place.

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Use this link to save $5 off your USAT membership renewal:
https://membership.usatriathlon.org/...A2-BAD7-6137B629D9B7

Business casual guy.

Swims laps in chino shorts and cotton polo shirt. Also answers work emails and calls in the hydrotherapy pool and sauna.

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Level II USAT Coach | Level 3 USAC Coach | NASM-CPT
Team Zoot | Tailwind Trailblazer
I can tell you why you're sick, I just can't write you an Rx

It's called "Mermaiding." Apparently, it's a thing. Who knew.

https://www.google.com/...x0oVkgk3l1hRiQLi_Cex-

I had a big fat guy walk up to me in the locker room. He turned around and asked if I could remove the band-aids from the sores he was covering up on his back.

Couldn't quite believe my eyes today when a rather nice looking girl stood up at the end of the lane as I was approaching - and lo & behold, she was wearing a g-string. This is in a rather conservative part of town, too.

You can’t make up this stuff ...
In short ... some guy is suing local city council for allowing fast swimmers in the slow lane at the local city run aquatic centre ...
I’ll just leave this here ...

https://infotel.ca/...m7bS-HpJ1GoFyp16WJ_o

I've been out of triathlon a while now and only really stop back in here when there's a big bike race or swim meet going on, but when a Facebook friend last week posted a picture allegedly from a Manitoba public washroom showing a decal on the hand dryer specifying that men should not dry their junk in it, I have to say I still immediately think of 'Strange Denizens' after all these years.

I am running into an issue with overweight old people using swim lanes to just walk up and down. They take up all four lanes. I've tried to get them to share lanes, the lifeguard has tried, management has tried, nothing works. There is even a large family pool that is typically empty, but they won't go in there. These folks walk easily for an hour, so I could be sitting there forever, and then other swimmers come in and soon there are 6-7 of us waiting. I've asked management if they can designate actual SWIM lap times. If they shared a lane, we'd all be happy. Management said they are working on a solution.

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The curious task of economics is to demonstrate to men how little they really know about what they imagine they can design.

I swim with a masters group twice a week at my local pool at 6:30 am. At the same time there is group of 3 or 4 middle aged guys, obviously friends, who are in a couple of lanes. 80-90% of their pool time is standing at the end of the lane talking about current events, politics, their lives, families, etc. They do this for about 40 minutes and then just before they get out and head home, they "swim" a couple of laps. lol

Had an issue like this recently. I was in the medium lane with one other, when I noticed another person had joined the lane and was walking laps. Next time I swam past him, I told him he needed to go in the open lane, no response. Next lap when I pulled out to overtake him I again told him he can't walk in the medium lane, again no response he just kept staring ahead. The other swimmer in the lane then got out, so as I was the only one left, I just kept going around him every lap, until someone else got in. I realised I needed to be more blunt and stood in front of him, pointed at the sign which said you need to be swimming 30-45 seconds per 25m in the medium lane. He get a little annoyed and said he does this all the time. Eventually the manager came and told him to get in the open land, where he remained for about 5 minutes before moving to the slow lane.

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instagram.com/42pointtwo

Well today I pushed back. All lanes taken up by floaters. I had little time for a swim and was not going to fart around with this crap. It became a little more heated than I thought it would. The life guard was a more mature person and threatened to kick them out of the pool completely if they didn't start respecting the rules. WTF. Why does it come to this? Then to find out two of them were family...mother/daughter. They even had an attitude about sharing. All them are so damn big too. There is no way to share with any of them.

I swam for an hour and left....all were still in there floating.

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The curious task of economics is to demonstrate to men how little they really know about what they imagine they can design.

I had my first weird swim this morning. I am in the first lane, and it is maybe 25% wider than the normal lanes. I am swimming with one other inexperience person, so we are just sharing and staying each on our own side. My goggles are prescription, and they really fogging up today, so my visibility is total crap. After a few laps, I unexpectedly pass someone in the middle of the lane. No clue the person was there until I am almost hitting her. I figured it was the other guy, but then I passed him further down. Then, a length later, I pass someone else squeezed between me and the wall. I am totally confused, so I stop and clean my prescription goggles to see what the heck is going on...

Two other people joined us and they just started swimming in their own makeshift lanes wherever they could fit between me and the other guy. I had no idea, and I am lucky I did not go skull-to-skull. So, at the next wall, I paused, rallied everyone up, and taught the crew how to share a lane by swimming circles.

I think I finally made the list.

I swim with the local tri club at every Friday from 6-7pm and we rent all the lanes during that time. Last Friday myself and the other men in the tri club were discretely ushered out of the pool as soon as it turned 7 in order to 'not be offensive in a sexual manner' to remaining clients.

The pool we use is across the street from one of largest mosques in the UK north of Birmingham. As it turned out, the pool was hosting a 'Ladies Night' while the men attended prayers across the road. As we were leaving the ladies were arriving, and I'm pretty sure my wetsuit exposes more skin than the swimsuits any of them were wearing. Given this is a community Tri club, the average age is roughly 45, and everyone is carrying some extra weight this time of year I imagine the sight of us was pretty offensive. Given all of us are also sufficiently experienced to have at lest one 'guy with his balls under than hand drier' story we found it pretty amusing. I guess the definition of a Denizen is culturally relative.

Obviously you haven't been swimming lately, Masters practice is at 5:30am! And those guys are nothing compared to Bag Lady. Bag Lady comes in and swims nothing but backstroke without goggles and with this crazy wide arm swing. She always goes to the end lane with the temporary steps and the motorized seat to help the elderly into the pool. She will not share a lane. She drags a chair across the pool deck to put her huge military style duffle bag in. It's big enough to fit a body, and no one knows what the hell is in the thing. She never gets into it, so its not swim gear. She got into a fight once with another swimmer for trying to share her lane.

Is not automatically sharing a lane or circle swimming a U.S. specific thing? Every pool I've been to just has Slow/Medium/Med-Fast/Fast lane markers with a circle swim direction logo. I've never even seen a lane that isn't shared, usually 3-4 in a lane!

IDK if it's US-specific, but of all the US pools I've been in as an adult onset swimmer, only one was marked with slow / medium / fast. No directionality posted for circling, but it was never a problem there. All the other pools I've used it is a rarity to find a person swimming to one side like they expect to share the lane. The vast majority swim right down he middle. When I ask to split the lane, I'd say it's maybe 50 / 50 as to whether they say Yeah sure, or respond with "I only have x laps left to do" which sounds a lot to me like "no, wait until I'm done".

But I want to give a word of thanks to the swimmer I shared with on Monday. She was on one side of the lane, so I dared to stick my feet in while waiting till she (stopped at the far end of the lane) turned around to see me. She then launched into butterfly and I thought, oh dear, this is going to be a rough share. But she did stay diligently on one side while she completed her IM. It was a weird night - she was one of multiple people not in the swim class lanes that were doing IM, which is just not at all common where I swim. At any rate - we never spoke but successfully shared the lane, with both of us doing a couple lengths of fly (or drowning simulation, depending on your pov of my attempt at it).

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To breathe, to feel, to know I'm alive.

I swim 1-2 times a year and even I know that it makes sense to circle swim. WTF is wrong with people?

Hey BMT! How you been? Haven't seen you on the trails lately.

Masters practice is at 5:30am!

You notice that I said "a" masters group. We start at 6:30, after the amateurs finish :)

Yeah, I'm familiar with the bag lady. Also, when she's finished her swim, she gets out on the pool deck and does the splits for about 2 or 3 minutes. Really weird.

Can't believe I left out that part. Still on the trails on Sat AM, just usually later in the morning.

Oh, hell no. And then he probably went and got in the pool. This is gross.