Reading this yesterday and today...and have forwarded it to all my friends. SOOOOO funny, so I chime in now.
One lifeguard we have we call "Needs a sandwich and a hug" extremely scary skinny and very sad.
We have a very flamboyant lifeguard who insists upon playing Its Raining Men or anything by Cher.
We have the Terminator - this riduculously bad swimmer who has gotten in fights with everyone, from the sweet moms, to the tri guys, to the elderly gentlemen. He starts every swim session with 400 breast stroke - got in one fight with my best friend and she yelled at him "Who the hell do you think you are Mark Spitz?" BUT see him out of the pool and he is a meak mild whimp!! AND he wears a speedo that is waaaaay to small. Icky!
We have deep diver - she's my best friend who every 100 or so gets to the end and just sinks then pops up like the first post - just like a seal. But she's an amazing swimmer and very curtious.
We have the 50 backstroker! Why in the world does he do 20 sets of this?
And cannot forget the older ladies - who don't shave enough and stand above you on deck and try to carry on a conversation with you....thank god I leave my goggles on when that happens!
And my favorite elderly gentlemen who always asks me (every day when I am in the pool)....when are you doing the BIG race (he means Kona) and I proudly tell him....in my dreams!
One more funny one....my husband was swimming at a beautiful pool on Nantucket last spring...he got to chatting with the lifeguard and asked if anyone famous ever swims there...another lifeguard chimed in with tell the Jerry Stiller (as in the dad from Sienfeld) Story. Apparently he likes to swim in his underwear to and to make a long story short...after alot of trying him to put on a suit, they just let him swim that way. The guards say its hard to even watch the others swim cuz they just keep getting the giggles. Can't you just hear him yelling Festivus for the Rest of Us??
Kat Donatello
2015 Betty Designs Team
RD, The Pumpkinman Triathlon Festival
http://www.pumpkinmantriathlon.com/