Common enough for real swimmers to breathe every two for the long stuff.

As for flip turns, there are some subtle positive reasons to learn and do them, even if you never pool race.

I thought I used the big brush on the sarcasm, should have used a power painter.

Seriously though, have always enjoyed your comments on the finer points of swimming and have a learned quite a few things from them.

I've recently run (literally) into two new categories:

1. Manatee Man - large, slow man with thick leathery hide who makes "u" turns at the wall. Often diagonally so that he cuts off the incoming swimmer. Also makes mid-lane U turns with no warning to cut in front of you. These "U" turns are are mix between walking and swimming...head and body in the water, feet on the bottom. Wears headphones to drown out your grumbling.

2. Fairtale Theatre Frog

http://www.tvshowsondvd.net/...re%20_FrogPrince.gif

Costume- blue long sleeve shirt, neoprene knee length knickers (also blue). Blue cap, goggles and neoprene hand paddles. Swims with the tops of her goggles above water and "paws" the water with her webbed hands. Imagine a weird, sexual catwoman crawl and you're on the right track....

I couldn't continue swimming I was choking on the chlorine from laughing so hard...

I haven't done an IM but I have done a 5k open water swim and can't do a flip turn to save my life.

I don't know if we've had this one before since its a new one for me.

A couple days ago i got done with my swim and was doing a 6 mile run that over looks the pool at my gym. Well about 15 minutes into my run i see a guy putting on his wetsuit and starting to go to town swimming. No big deal i figured just trying to figure out his wetsuit. Almost 10 mins later i look down and see something between his legs, while he still has the wetsuit on, i keep running thinking to my self no way is that possible. Look the next time around and you better believe it, He is swimming with a wetsuit AND and pull bouy. I was about to just go down and smack him but i had to finish my run.

Grant

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Grant
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I've got one for you all, heat tri man!

Guy must be 5'6", 350 lbs. He marches out from whatever sweated him up in the gym, and directly into the pool to rinse off. He then goes to the hot tub for 5 minutes, into the sauna for 5 minutes, and then back into the pool to rinse off. 3 times on that rotation. Blegh.

If I ever really stopped to think about all the nastiness in a pool, I wouldn't swim anymore.

John

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Top notch coaching: Francois and Accelerate3 | Follow on Twitter: LifetimeAthlete |

I have a new one. The woman with long hair who doesn't wear a swim cap and doesn't know how to count to 5.

During a swim class I take I usually have a woman in my lane who never wears a swim cap. Her hair is always splatted all over her face when she comes up for air. More silly than anything.

What is really annoying is she never counts to 5 before starting to follow someone in the lane. I will go so far as saying "OK, I go on the :30, you go on the :35". She still does it, taps my feet the whole time. I let her go first, thinking she wants to go faster but that isn't it, she slows down and I end up swimming too close, even with a longer wait. She never knows what we are doing next and is perpetually confused. Not a good lane-mate.

Problem is, she will likely be there next week too so I'm stuck with her and she gets more and more annoying every week. Garrrr...

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Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

Not sure if he swam or not.....but, saw some guy get into the hottub, then shower....wearing his sweats the whole time.

guess he thought he would loose more weight getting into the hottub with his sweats on....then showering with 'em on too!

Hilarious thread... I saw a guy that may be different enough... a cross between 'naked as long as possible guy' and 'calisthenics guy'. Naked arm circles, naked stretching, naked pushups. So gross. I didnt check if he was hitting the tile floor...

That's why we're Ironmen. We do things the average person wouldn't dream of.

Breast Stroke Girl.

She swam breaststroke in the next lane with her titties out.

The first time I passed her, I thought maybe she just had a little nipple slip, but that seemed odd, because she was wearing a Speedo one-piece. I thought about that a little, because I'm pretty sure that women almost always know what's showing, and it seemed like even if it was possible for a little slippage, she'd know it, onnacounta it'd feel different. Next time I passed her, I saw that she had put her arms through the holes, and pulled her suit down, allowing the girls to swim free. She swam like this for several lengths.


This is the best thread ever. Even better than the hot chicks (RIP) thread.

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"You'll find a slight squeeze on the hooter an excellent safety precaution, Miss Scrumptious."

"I can live with doubt and uncertainty and not knowing. I think it is much more interesting to live not knowing than to have answers that might be wrong." -- Richard Feynman

Oh, god...I just snarfed iced tea after reading that....

John

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Top notch coaching: Francois and Accelerate3 | Follow on Twitter: LifetimeAthlete |

haha this is a great thread. I guess I would be a strange denizen due to the fact that I am the only one at my pool who does drills. I feel weird doing the kicking on my side, catch-up, one arm, fist drills during my warm-up. THere has been this one lady at the pool lately who has shared my lane a couple of times, she doesn't ask to share the lane, she kinda butts in. As an example, here's what she said to me as an introduction to swim a couple of weeks ago right after I get done with an interval "I saw you before, you were swimming on the right side and then you were swimming down the middle, which side are you on?" Nothing like a regular "excuse me but do you mind if we share the lane?" So many people at our pool have such a hard time asking this question, I don't get it. Oh yeah, it has been the opposite way before, two people in every lane and she has the only single, so I walk over to her lane, but she swims for 30min. straight every day, no rest. So you have to get her attention somehow to make her stop and ask her. Most of the time I just jump in though.

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"I like to start out slow, and then taper off."

-Doug Thorne (TVHS XC)

That's nuts. Did you get any swimming in or did you just study her stroke?

In Reply To:

That's nuts. Did you get any swimming in or did you just study her stroke?

I came in 9 seconds slower in the 500.

Then I cooled down, for a long time, in which some stroke analysis occurred.

All hot young women should swim this way.

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"You'll find a slight squeeze on the hooter an excellent safety precaution, Miss Scrumptious."

"I can live with doubt and uncertainty and not knowing. I think it is much more interesting to live not knowing than to have answers that might be wrong." -- Richard Feynman

I got one:

220 pound bald medicine ball guy. This guy always seems the be there when I show up. Medicine ball guy walks back and forth down the lane alternating different throws. He throws the med ball over his head down the lane, creating a huge splash and waves, often times splashing others including the water aerobics ladies. then jogs to the ball. He follows this up with a chest pass, then bounces it on the bottom of the pool a few times, and repeats.

Not so amusing when there are only four lanes.

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"It's nice to be great, but far greater to be nice"

that is strange - here's one from the other day - guy BEGAN the workout with snorkling mask, Zoomers, and paddles - swam this way for approximately 45 minutes, then topped the workout off with 15 minutes of walking on his hands..... of course, WITH the Zoomers still on.......

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"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

After I finished up my swim this morning the water aerobics class was starting and 15 60+ year old women are all talking about incontinence and how it's getting worse everyday. 2-3 of them said they can't go more than 10-15 minutes(and this is an hour long class). Now, I know people pee in the pool. I know people admit to peeing in the pool. But please, at least don't discuss it while you are IN the pool.

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Fight............Finish

I'm very VERY surprised that no one brought up the "old swim suit guy." The one where they suit has become so thin that you just see more than you want to.

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"your horse is too high" - tigerchik

All hot older women should too, for that matter.

Yes I agree they are at every YMCA in every state, taking up valuable swim lanes everywhere!

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I have failed at many things, but never in my desire to try again.

I have old weird stroke guy as well. This post is making me cry from laughter! I thought I was the only one who named people at the pool and races!

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I have failed at many things, but never in my desire to try again.

I got that beat. Last year a guy at the YMCA showered after working out, got dressed in cowboy boots, jeans, button down shirt and then went and sat in the steam room for 10 minutes. Came out fully clothed and soaked with sweat, grabbed his gym bag and headed out the door.

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I call him the slapper.

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I have failed at many things, but never in my desire to try again.

I always see this guy in the locker room: Hulk Hogan Head. Skinny 60-70 y/o dude with the exact head of Hulk Hogan. The hair, the stache, all of it... It is both creepy and inspiring in its majesty...

Big T