.... and your point would be?
At least some of us are out of the wetsuit at the pool.

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2017 Cervelo P2
2017 Cervelo S2
itraininla.com
#itraininla

New one I saw at the gym is body lotion guy. Puts on about a gallon of lotion then while getting dressed, he leaves a butt print on the bench.

jaretj

Whoa! I am glad that I can totally change standing up. I'll remember not to sit on any benches.

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"Slowbern has always made astute observations."-Casey 03/10/2009
2013-2014 Detroit Lions---13-3 until proved otherwise.

huh?

"Tim, if you are a 6' 4' Black Man we are twins without the pool buoy."

LOL! Close though... 5'11", 145, poster boy for the Stay Out of the Sun campaign.

Triathletes gotta represent at the pool to dispel the myth that "triathletes can't swim".

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Mr. Uncaptured External Costs

Fossil carbon is planetary poison.

There is a "Swimming Pools Make Good Babysitters Guy" at my local pool. This guy leaves his 8 or 9 year old kid to splash around in the lanes while he works out for a few hours.

Then there is the 300lb Humpback Lady with her full flippers and snorkel. I looked at her underwater once and noticed her spreading her massive jaw to trap millions of tiny plankton.

The "Newlywed Polute the Pool Couple" is always fun to swim next to. The pool always seems to get cloudy shortly after they leave.

We have a few to add from my pool.

Overweight Bulemic Chick- Usually shows up a little after me acts pissed because I took one of the last remaining lanes, she is then forced to swim in the non marked areas. I think she coaches a local (very successful) high school swim team. If I'm swimming with a hangover it is close with her. I secretely despise her (until now the secret its out) though in three years I've never said a word to her.

Bosnian Dude wearing a speedo covered with tats- He started showing up a couple years ago. He is kind of intimidating because he is like a tall guy. Has actually got some coaching and is now a lot better swimmer than he was a couple years ago. I think he is doing an IM next year. Often seen with Courtney Love

Courtney Love- Bosnian Dude's girlfriend/sidekick/training partner they are both apparently into tris she looks a little like a clean Courtney Love. Haven't seen her in months maybe Bosnian Dude shot her and threw her in a sistern.

I'm really swimming this fast guy- An older guy whose body looks like complete shit but he can really swim fast, he always drinks out of an IM water bottle. No idea what his story is.

MILF #1-- You are my favorite. You always tell me good morning and are very sweet. I love swimming next to you and checking you out...you make my workouts so much better at 5 am. You always have new swimsuits on every few months.

Wheelchair Guy- Self Explanatory

Hot tub guy- You are a local triathlete but all I ever see you do is sitting in the hot tub, stretching, socializing, and talking to your coach. Do you ever actually workout you squirrel!

I'm get in get out guy- I get there early I swim my laps don't talk to anyone, get out of there and get to work.

At my pool there is "older triathlete chick". She shows up with all her gadgets (swim fins, kick, board, buoy, paddles, two sets of goggles, goggles case, swim workout sheet) in the most expensive Speedo bathing suit she can find. And then she proceeds to be passed by all the real swimmers, over and over again. Oh...that's me!

From this day forth you shall be known as "Guy with Issues"

He does have issues, but I have a new one to add that popped up a week or so ago.

Turns out "the whistler guy" is also "he thinks he owns the pool" guy. A little bit ago, this guy had the gall to approach two of the collegiate (pool is at a college campus) and berate them for swimming during 'rec' hours. The pool is not full mind you and there were open lanes. However, he felt compelled to let them know that they had their own time to workout and this time was for all the donors and alumni to swim. He even threatened a lawsuit. Once the head coach found this out...I have not heard a peep out him...or even a whistle for that matter.

daved

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http://www.theundergroundcoach.com

not in the pool, but just outside the pool ...

my gym (a pretty nice Lifetime) has a sign near the sinks that says "gentlemen, please be courteous to others and wear clothing or a towel at the sinks." This was likely done to combat 65-ish beer-gut man who shaves his face in front of the mirror buck naked with such precision that it takes approx. 10 min. no so pleasant a sight.

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http://thechuckblog.blogspot.com

Sound good to me!

Asparagus Pee Guy

At my gym, there is a guy who always pees in the showers; but not regular pee, he has the most foul smelling asparagus pee. Somehow this guy always seems to have the same schedule as me. But NOBODY hits the showers when he's in there.

You forgot the guy "gawking" at hotties in the other lane. - this was a thread awhile back, where did he go?

I think that was Swimfan using some other name.

At my gym we have a hot tub near the lap pool. All the guys (usually our brothers south of the border) sit in this hot tub with their eyes set to pool. The second a remotely cute girls gets into the pool, they suddenly have an interest in swimming. They all swarm to the slow lane where they each take turns trying to impress the girl with their water thrashing. Apparently in Mec-E-co the ladies are attracted to whichever fellow can generate the biggest splashes. Odd mating ritual if you ask me.

Reply to:

"All the guys (usually our brothers south of the border) sit in this hot tub with their eyes set to pool. The second a remotely cute girls gets into the pool, they suddenly have an interest in swimming. They all swarm to the slow lane where they each take turns trying to impress the girl with their water thrashing. Apparently in Mec-E-co the ladies are attracted to whichever fellow can generate the biggest splashes. Odd mating ritual if you ask me."

Yes, I've seen these fellows at my local YMCA also.... A very odd ritual where they swim with their heads completely out of the water thrashing their heads from side to side and smacking the water with their hands vigorously in a feable attempt to move forward in the water. LOL.

They can actually haul some ass in this very non-aero position -- heads fully exposed and body almost vertical under the water. They never last more than 25 meters but during those 25m some of them are quick. Maybe their buddies whisper "immigration" in their ear before they set off.

I usually end up waiting for a lane and get to watch several people "running" in the lanes. The pool is only 4 feet deep in the middle. Kinda fun to watch em going at it or the overweight class doing their water aerobics?
I prefer to swim in a lane next to the attractive woman in the bikini..at least its a distraction and good practice bilateral breathing so I can sneak peaks without her finding out..

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Trying to find ways to pass the time.

Peppy or Peggy LePew - If I am in the lane by the side of the pool, I always get a whiff of some really nasty perfume and cologne. Sometimes, it smells like the Avon aftershave in antique car shaped bottles that granpa used to use. If not that, then it's some nasty smelling old lady perfume. It kinda sucks when that smell is contaminating those prescous breaths you take every few seconds.

"hot body/crappy swimmer" chick- ripped body, tanned, top of the line gadgets... jumps in the pool...total disaster.

I can't ever smell anything (cologne, perfume, or other odors) in the pool, I guess I'm either lucky or can't smell my own stink.

Opportunity knocks, my friend. Tell her you're a certified (with the SCOA) swim coach and you think she has potential. Help her float on her back and the rest will be history.

The pool i do most of my swimming in is the schools pool (read: free). It's never busy, but from time to time you get some interesting people.

First time I walked in there, there was this old guy in the middle of the pool wildly thrashing. I thought the guy was drowning, but the guard was just sitting there reading her book. I took a second to watch and realized he was really doing the back stroke....but he had absolutly no rythm and did not bend his arms at any part of the stroke.

Then there were the times when the track team decided to invade the pool for workouts. They never put out lane markers because the gromets in the side of the pool rusted out, so it's just one giant open lane. I was in the middle of a 1000m set when fifty billion people jump in the pool and start running to the other side. They didn't even care I was there. In hindsight, it was good mass start training, especially when after the first 25m of attempting to avoid people, I just decided to ignore anyone ahead of me and ram them if they didn't move. Actually happened two or three times.

I have had the obligatory 25 yard super man. Espeically since I usually do my workouts with a friend of mine who happens to be a girl. He usually shows up, hops in and waits until I'm at the wall before sprinting off to the other wall. Just to be an ass, a few times I would let him take off and then just up my pace enough to pull even, then when he stopped out of breath on the wall, I'd just flip and keep on going.


The other pool I go to on occasion (the YMCA) has it's own set of weirdos. I've heard stories of old naked guys, but this place takes the cake.

I got to experience the hot tub moffia. 5 old Italian guys who do nothing but sit naked in the hot tub and chat, eyeing everyone that walks buy to get from the locker room to the pool.

Then for some reason, just off the locker room is a lounge type room with leather chairs and a big screen TV. I go to this pool on saturdays, and of course, there are a few naked old men lounging on the chairs watching foot ball.

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sometimes you just have to eat the cake

I was a little early at Masters practice tonight and I started talking to a nice boy on the team. He's about 18-19(Im 23), very Quebecois, and he lets me practice my pathetic french conversation skills with him. Our conversation is generally very friendly although lately his side seems more like flirting than general small talk.

So I sit down next to him tonight and he asks me what I did over the weekend.
I reply "My boyfriend came to visit me from Ottawa"
Boy: "Oh...I kind of thought we had something going on..." he sits there for a momment staring at the deck then turns to me and says "does this mean you're not a virgin?"

I saw a woman at the pool over the weekend who had a cup of coffee at the end of her lane. Never seen that before.

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"You can never win or lose if you don't run the race." - Richard Butler