I see this guy at my pool "makin the rounds." He goes from the sauna, to the hot water therapy pool, to the hot tub, swims a lap in the lap pool and repeats several times. If the pool is crowded, he'll even ask to share a lane for one lap...Pretty bizarre.

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"I've sold my soul to Ironman."

Circuit drills!

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We've got this guy at our pool....sit in the steam bath, start sweating until a gallon per minute seems to be 'dripping' off his 250+ pound body, rinse off the sweat in the lap pool....I have to get out.

Ok -how about the follow you home from the pool lady.
Seriously, this happened to me. Swimming in the same lane as this lady (in Canada we share lanes). We are in the fast lane so I am passing her (since she is a slow swimmer). Anyway, she gets annoyed and tries to have an argument. The lifegaurd gets involved and not wanting an argument I talk only to the lifegaurd, who supports me (Remember this is Canada where we share lanes and we are swimming in the designated fast lane). So later I am leaving the pool car park in my van when I see her in her car. Don't think too much about it. She leaves the pool car park behind me. I get on the main highway. She gets on the main highway behind me. (Well maybe she lives in the same suburb as me). I exit the main highway. She exits behind me. Now I am thinking - um, definately odd. So, instead of driving home, I drive around a small circle. Sure enough she follows me. So then I drive into the small local police station. Yup, she followed me there too - until she realized that it was a police station - and then she left.

Don't the pool denizens know they are supposed to stay in the pool!

That's creepy!!!!!

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"Wow, are you a triathlete?"
If spoken by a non-swimmer, that's a compliment. When spoken by a swimmer.... -glitch
My wife's blog http://www.hostilewit.com

Man I am glad this thread is still around!

I cracked up at the pool tonight after Masters swim. On the way into the locker room I spied a guy wearing a knit beanie hanging out off to the side of the lapping pool. The dude was wearing a bathing suit, wearing his hat, holding a towel and looking at the pool. This guy had an ugly shaggy goatee and looked kind of like a Phish groupie or a stoner from another planet! I couldn't help but gawk and my stare was noticed.

Beauty Eh!

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

I'm the "only does 50 meters and looks like he's about to drown" guy. I never did any lengths and never learned how to swim. So in my first try I only did 25 meters back and forth before giving up and going back to join my kids. In that 50 meters someone did manage to drift on my side of the lane and swam right into me.

The next time I probably did less than 400meters in 30 minutes. I learned that I really need to get a more streamlined swimsuit and learn to swim with my head under the water. I guess the next step is to find a swim teacher and go to the pool often.

I'm not too worried about people peeing in the pool. I have 2 kids aged 1 and 2 at home and go into the bath with them. I figure the concentration there is higher that what anyone can put into something the size of a pool.

Hopefully a few months from now I'll be "does 750 meters without stopping guy"

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Warning: Username does not in any way apply to triathlon past and future performance.

I hate the people who are sharing a lane in the lap pool and chat for 5 minutes after every 25. Just when I'm about to ask them if they are done, giving the big hint that this is a "lap" pool, not a "chat"pool. Then, they lazily swim another 25. This is just enough to say they are swimming laps. Drives me nuts because I'm usually waiting around for a lane to open while watching them do this.

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Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

We have "the penis blow dryer" guy...............after he swims and takes a shower, he grabs one of the blowdryers on the wall and, gripping his manhood between his thumb and index finger, he gets the blowdryer within millimeters of his twig and berries and proceeds to dry his mess pube by pube. It takes him about 5 minutes to complete the transaction. he looks about 65 years old.

I wonder if he has a date with some cute college girl afterwards and wants to heat that little sucker back up to maximum potential in case he gets lucky. I mean, we all have the same problem.........ya come out of the pool, pull your drag shorts off and you have a vienna sausage sitting on top of a walnut to work with.....

Oh yeah, then my swim buddy gets the blowdryer after him and blowdries his feet, which I thought was weird until "the penis blow dryer" guy showed up a few weeks ago.....

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thechromedome
http://www.favoritefinishlines.blogspot.com
http://www.cupcakecartel.org
My 20% off code for 2018 FS Series races: tricred18
"there are no drafters in heaven" - C Bonner

the guy in the flesh colored Speedos at the Embarcadero YMCA was getting some pretty funny looks today. He looked like GI Joe.

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"A society is defined not only by what it creates, but by what it refuses to destroy."
John Sawhill

Ouch. That stung (I've seen Phish 107 times).

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"Triathlon is for people who can't handle drugs and alcohol." -IMFL t-shirt

The Dude Abides...

No goggles and board shorts guy

Confused/Nervous Lady who looks at me like I am crazy when I ask if I can share a lane (as you can see, everyone else is sharing a lane so yes, you need to share this one with me)

Shares the lane 70/30 guy (I guess this simulates the swim in a tri, but still.......)

This is usually the attire of "Calisthentics on the deck Meathead guy." Wearing the aforementioned board shorts with no goggles, this creature will saunter down to the pool area with notebook and gallon jug of water in tow. He enters the water with purpose and gives the water a look like he's gonna kick its ass. After his push off the wall, he seemingly disappears amid the flurry of waves, only to reappear with arms and legs flailing about midway down the pool. Eventually he makes it to the other end and pauses for a brief stop. Round two is on, and our mighty challenger conquers the water again as he makes it back to his starting point. No rest for the weary, however, as it is off to sets of push ups and sit ups on the deck. It is cardio day, after all, and you don't want that heart rate to drop. He decides to give the water a good thrashing for maybe two to four more laps before the obligatory twenty minutes of cardio is reached. A quick dry from the towel, a swig from the gallon jug, and maybe a flex for little miss lifeguard, and our hero departs having brought the water to submission.

I see the "Huffer". He's a good swimmer, does lots of laps and is faster (and older) than I am. After every interval he stands at the end saying out loud "Huff....huff....huff..." every time he exhales. It's deliberately ennunciated, and actually quite loud. Not sure why he does that - could it be asthma or something related? I've never gotten up the nerve to ask.

"the penis blow dryer" guy

Man, that might be the creepiest thing yet. While I'm not exactly sure which one, this sort of behavior must violate some pool rule or law.

I had that dude last week at the gym. i don't mind the act because I do not look but the smell of burn hair! that made me sick!

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It hurts so bad, it feels good.

This ranks right up there with the guy who posted that while showering after his swim one day the guy showering next to him had a hard-on.

My pool had a sign in the change room for a while that stated "Hair dryers are for use on hair on head only", although in this case I guess it could still be misinterpretted!

My pool also has a sign on the door from the showers that open to the pool stating that swim suits are mandatory. I always wonder what incident lead to that sign, it's a YWCA but a co-ed facility so I wonder if some poor old lady sauntered naked onto the pool deck thinking it's a women-only pool.

Right now i'm dealing with an ENTIRE city of breast strokers here in Paris (France). I've been here for 5 weeks now and have swam in 3 different pools. All anyone does is breast stroke! Young/old, tall/short, fat/slim. I don't know if there was/is some famous olympic French breast stroker that they idolize, but it's driving me crazy.

I'm trying to join a masters club, but in France, you need a medical certificate before joining any club or signing up for any race. I've got to get that medical certificate before they turn me into a breast stroker. I wonder how long it would take me to breast stroke at entire IM?

If you see me breast stroking at IMC next summer, it means i've snapped and they finally got to me. Just pat me on the back and pray for me.

SA

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Stephane A.
Races in 2009:
Barcelona Quelle Challenge Half
IM Switzerland

This thread really makes me appreciate my neighborhood lap pool that I usually have to myself.

Surprised no one has mentioned the Navy recruits practicing their swimming before boot camp. One Friday morning at Master's swim about 10 or 15 street gang looking guys came strolling in and hung out around the pool. Most were wearing street shorts, and covered head to toe in tattoos. Kind of like this....



Not that I have a problem with tatoos, but these guys obviously didn't fit in. Everyone was a little uneasy and didn't know what to do. Eventually, their recruiter showed up in uniform and we all figured out what was going on. They did a couple of laps and left.

How about weird breast stroke lady? I'm towards the end of a long straight swim and she stops me with about 250 to go to see if she can share the lane. Somewhat rude, but semi-understandable since I had been going for a good 15 minutes at this point. She proceeds to put on webbed swim gloves and breast stroke her way up and down the lane with her head out of the water. She stays just barely on the right side of the lane and has a nice wide kick. This continues for ten minutes and then she gets out and stares at me from the hot tub. Just stares. Weird.

Not a strange denizen, but funny experience. I swim in the mornings at the local rec center. This morning no lifeguard turned up. The ladies that also swim in the morning had the frint desk girl running around trying to find phone numbers to get someone to the pull. It turned out that another employee could 'sit by the pool with a life ring' and watch us swim until the lifeguard got there.

You should have seen the ladies. To begin with, it was like their crack dealer was out of stock, then when they were told they could swim they acted like a bunch of 12 year old girls and ran off to the pool as fast as the could.

Im almost certain this is performed in the locker room. I am in the navy stationed at NAS Jacksonville and there are tons of really old dudes that have all kinds of naked rituals. you learn to stare at the ceiling most of the time.

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High Speed - Low Drag