The problem is not the "cooking" per se but ALL the utensils needed to do that task and thinking that we HAVE to wash everything we use after finishing the meal (pot/pan, cooking spoon, plate, spoon to serve the sauce, fork/tongs to serve the salad, cheese grinder, etc). We seem too complicated, but on the contrary we are very simple to figure out :P

I Dont know if that was the reason in this case but I have to agree with your ideas on this one....

warning: sweeping generalization: It seems women overcomplicate the simplest stuff....and create work for themselves...and then stress out...then expect help doing the work they created....then get frustrated that we dont help on stuff we would have never done in the first place....end up mad and ranting....

the holidays are a perfect example:

gifts HAVE to be bought for certain people ( I say: no we dont )
we HAVE to do a christmas card (I say: no we dont)
We have to bring something home made to the holiday pot luck...which will include a speical trip to the store and then agonize over what we buy and prepare...(I say: now we dont...it creates work and no one eats most of it anyway...lets just go to the store and pick up something to bring)

didnt Oprah tell us to focus on whats really important..spending time with each other and appreciating each other?.....the endless "to do's" that women create because in HAS to be done seem to get in the way of all this....

but I dont see much hope in this ever changing....

Yes this is completely true!
I like to consider myself 'easy going' but that threw me over the edge!
Really, 90% of the stress we face is created by ourselves and crazy expectations.

But-why oh WHY does he insist on wearing dirty shoes in the house! please just give me this one thing! :)

DING DING DING DING DING DING DING....We have a winner!

Welcome to my world!

I am taking away your man-card forever for watching Oprah! Her studio is right next to my place and I don't even know what channel she is on!

Not to mention all of the X-mas crap we have to drag out of the attack and spread all around the house. Every year my wife accumulates at least 1 more bin of this stuff. Then there are all of the post holiday trips to return unwanted gifts and buy more unwanted stuff on sale. The guy with the popcorn sounds spot on to me...

Spot on! But, your man-card is permanent revoked for watching Oprah...

---

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went. - Will Rogers

Emery's Third Coast Triathlon | Tri Wisconsin Triathlon Team | Push Endurance | GLWR

Rant: WTF is up with this man card crap?

Just to add to this theory: notice that the womens are so bogged down in holiday stuff that practically none of them are posting on their own forum lately, and it's been left to all of us guys who have been lurking here?

Oh, and in an attempt to keep this thread at least a little on topic, I will post a brief rant on my wife's behalf (she can't do it herself 'cause she's away):

"My husband spends way the hell too much time online talking to imaginary friends, and I trip on his bikes in the back hall when I come home at night."

---

-----
Over 4.5 years bike crash free.

Then, after dragging all that crap out of the attic, guess who is going to be expected to haul it all back up there??? Along with the extra crap she had to buy this year on sale!

Man, this is great thread ...

---

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went. - Will Rogers

Emery's Third Coast Triathlon | Tri Wisconsin Triathlon Team | Push Endurance | GLWR

Sounds like my tenant, Dave. I was making myself some pasta (gluten free, rice based) when the contractor came by that I'd hired to fix up the window frames. I had to walk the contractor around to make sure we were on the same page about what I needed done and get the quote, so I asked Dave "keep an eye on this and turn off the stove when it's done."

I came back to overboiled noodles that were disintegrating in the water and the excuse "I don't know how to tell when rice noodles are done cooking..."

because it's sooo much different to find out if rice noodles are soft compared to regular noodles when the exact same rules apply?


Then again, this is the same lazy man that can't take the 2 seconds required when stopping to open the gate so he can park the car to also make sure the lint from the dryer at the end of the hose where it catches on the little cage thingy that keeps birds from nesting inside it hasn't clogged. That he might burn the house down around himself makes no never mind to him, it's too difficult to remember to glance over there from time to time.


I see a bunch of the visiting men have claimed that a lot of the stress and rants come from unnecessary work we create for ourselves. Not necessarily true. I argue a lot of the rants come from the men in our lives taking us and the work we do for granted.... like not being in the mood to boil water and instead waiting till the woman gets home all tired and exhausted and expecting her to boil it for him.

---

There is no justice, there is only me. -- Death

See? You just make a simple thing very complicated situation. where a simple chinese take-out would have solve the problem.

I have some holiday man rage, fortunately, it is not against my husband (this year). A bunch of my friends have young kids and several husbands have decided that gift buying and decorating is a waste of time and money and it's all about consumerism. I had one friend tell me that she would have to go buy their Christmas tree, haul it into the house and set it up because her husband didn't think it was necessary. They have a 5 year old that is so excited to decorate trees, she came over to our house and decorated ours with us, she was over for several hours watching holiday shows, drinking cocoa and helping us decorate. We were happy to provide good memories for her surrounding the holidays but after a while I started getting angry at the husbands because here's something they don't seem to understand: IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU! How convenient to be the Grinch and refuse to participate but ultimately, you lose because you missed the opportunity to bond with family and friends when you stand around complaining instead of participating.

It didn't help that right before the holidays one of my friends told me her husband thinks diamond wedding rings represent consumerism and status and that he decided he was never getting her a ring but oh he had the time and money to go buy a Ninetendo Wii. Men in the northwest have this whole granola angle they are trying to work but I'm onto it!

how can you compare a wii to something for which there are armed conflicts all over the world, mining operations damaging the environment and so on? Good that some guys are finally starting to wise up about the whole 'diamonds are forever' thing, it would be nice if more women did the same.

I agree and I would advise women to see wedding rings as leashes! Get away from leashes! Be free, you don't need a ring.

"Really, 90% of the stress we face is created by ourselves and crazy expectations."

This is the understatement of the year!!!

He had reasons for not buying other types of rings too so at some point you have to start thinking maybe he doesn't want to spend any money on it. She is considering tattooing her ring finger since a guy in her office asked if she played around since she doesn't wear a wedding ring.

My woman still has her Woman Card intact. One requirement of a Woman Card is that her man never have to do any cooking or cleaning. I can work outside in the yard, on the roof, in the basement, fixing a million things that need to be fixed around the house, painting, maintaining the cars, and paying the bills - but not cooking or cleaning (with the exception of barbequeing, or helping to clean up after a meal). That's woman's work, and just another way that women want to take away our masculinity.

I think that most men tend to think only about what they want and that's it. It's not that they're deliberately trying to annoy us, it just rarely occurs to them to give anyone other than themselves a thought. [And if you ever need proof of this theory, go to any sports bar/restaurant on a Saturday or Sunday during football season around lunch or early afternoon. Lots of dads will have kids in tow because it's mom's time off. The kids will be running around while dad's eyes are glued to the TV. Do you think dad said, hey kids -- wanna go to the sports bar, order some food, and watch the game? I doubt it. They simply thought -- gee, I'd like to go to the sports bar, order some food, and watch the game; I guess the kids can come along too.]

And before any of you man lurkers get your panties in a wad over this, I'm making a generalization here -- a "rule of thumb" if you will. It saves me quite of bit of heartburn to remember that hubby is generally looking out for #1 and if I want him to take me or the kids into consideration, I'll need to say something. He's more than happy to take us into consideration, but I just have to remind him.

I'm not a fan of diamond rings, but if a woman wants one, I'll get her one. However, I'm not getting a ring that is worth 3 month's salary. That is extortion. I remember when it was only 2 month's salary. That's like $15k for me; that's a freaking down payment on a house!

---

--
01001010 01100101 01101110 01001000 01010011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01000100 01100101 01110110 01101001 01101100 00100000 00101000 01100001 01100011 01100011 01101111 01110010 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01101111 01100001 01100100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110011 01100101 00101001 00100001
http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

Then I must be a woman with balls. I cook, clean, and do laundry in addition to mowing the yard, barbequing, watching football, and checkout out the hotties.

---

--
01001010 01100101 01101110 01001000 01010011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01000100 01100101 01110110 01101001 01101100 00100000 00101000 01100001 01100011 01100011 01101111 01110010 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01101111 01100001 01100100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110011 01100101 00101001 00100001
http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

it's an attempt by a number of men who are insecure about their gender identity to find emotional comfort by belonging to a group of similarly confused people.

dude, you're like 3/3 so far!

have you ever lived alone in your entire life, or, like an infant, have you always had a woman around to take care of you because you were incapable of doing it yourself?

And, according for Facebook, you cuddle after sex.

I don't even know where to begin on my husband except to say: It really is all about him unless I can convince him that whatever I'm asking him to do also benefits him. Just doing it for me is rarely enough. He isn't a bad guy, just doesn't see the value in doing a lot of stuff around the house. He doesn't care if there dishes are piling up. He doesn't care of the carpet is covered in dog hair. He doesn't care that there are no clean towels. He doesn't care of the lawn is overgrown. He just doesn't understand what any of this has to do with him.

He also hates Christmas. I love it. We don't have kids so I can't pull that one out as defense. I don't decorate anymore because I have to do all the work. I have great memories of Christmas as a kid and my mom is totally into it. Luckily my brother and his family live 20 minutes away so I get a brief fix.

The big problems come in when neither one of us want to do something. We are both really stubborn so whatever that thing is won't get done for a looooong time.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

You silly womens! If you only knew the crap we had to deal with the title of this thread would be "Mens are so great for putting up with us!". I could make a long list of stuff I deal with but I'm too busy thinking about me right now.

Yes please! Super hot ginger beef with a nice cold beer. Done!

My rant(s):
Xmas: I hate xmas, I really do. I do a lot for the stuff for the kids because they LOVE IT, but what we do is still FAR FAR tamer than a lot of people do. Smaller tree, smaller more personal gifts for the kids, more time together than not. I refuse to buy into this commercial shit. Our kids had just as much fun at xmas than others did, and we spent tops $100 on each of them. All of which we spent at local small businesses. Nothing commercial, nothing Disney, nothing made in China. We don't send cards, we call friends and family instead. We don't buy presents for aother adults, I can buy a sweater just as easily as you can thanks. Why on earth do people see the need to go overboard? Oh and stop telling me that I "have to take time off from work" during the holidays. Why? What for? I get 4 days off and that's it. I work in a event-driven industry and in a department that lives by the calendar (it's year end now, can ya tell?). So stop telling me to do something I can't and won't. (yes mom, that one's for you).

Useless Women & Men: I have met incredibly lazy women too. Those that refuse to get a license so they can be chauffeured everywhere. Those who can't cook anything to save their livs. Those who think that big tits will get them through life. Those that think it's ok to have someone take care of everything for you, so you can do the important things in life like shopping, getting your nails done and going to the gym. I can live with lazy men (that is, I don't live with them but I don't let them get to me), but it's dumb useless women that drive me insane. Women want men to be everything: strong and masculine, yet watch Oprah, wear pink and cry at chick flicks. Guess what? Those men don't exist (and if they do they usually aren't interested in women). Men say they want women to be everything: smart, able to take care of herself financially, know how to change a flat tire (on their car), to not *need* anything from the man except companionship and hot nookie. Guess what? Those women don't get the attention the useless twats with fakies get.

Men & women don't take each other for granted. Lazy men and lazy women take capable men and capable women for granted. Capable men and capable women bitch and moan about lazy men and lazy women. But the capable ones are just as much at fault - they let themselves play that role. Don't like it? Find a just-as-capable partner. That's what I did.

OK rant off, I gotta finish year-end work.

AP

---

------------------------
"How bad could it be?" - SimpleS

Yer a smart man. I'd rather have the tattoo (as per trailbait's post) than another diamond. If I want a diamond, I'll buy it myself.

AP

---

------------------------
"How bad could it be?" - SimpleS

Whoa, whoa, whoa! HOLD ON! They're not going to get me through life? Well what the hell is the point of these things then?

---

______________________________________
I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way

LOL... at least they float. ;-)

AP

---

------------------------
"How bad could it be?" - SimpleS

going on a tangent here, but why would somebody want to do that? shower > cuddle any time, or would you want to cuddle after you both get home from a run?

You don't need a man card, you've got this card:

---

---------------------------------------
Awww, Katy's not all THAT evil. Only slightly evil. In a good way. - JasoninHalifax

Seriously guys, is your grasp on your masculinity that tenuous that it can be lost by cooking or cleaning?

every single rude dude that has come into every shop i've wrenched at and treated me like i have no clue what I'm talking about simply because I'm female. Also the ones who try to help me work on their bikes (no they aren't trying to learn how to fix their own stuff) even though they brought it into the shop because they COULDN'T FIX IT THEMSELVES.

However, on the other side of things, 90% of the male customers I've had at every shop I've worked at have thought it's really cool that a girl is working on their bike and have shown me extra awesome respect.

---

__________________________________________________

my severely neglected blog

A freakin' men I don't need no stinkin man card.

Translate that into English? ;-)

---

clm
Nashville, TN
https://twitter.com/ironclm | http://ironclm.typepad.com

You are asking the wrong girl.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

i'm with you. i have two sisters, and like our mother, we can cook, clean, are well educated and are financially and socially responsible. my brothers married women who sit on the coach all day complaining how tired they are. how they ended up with these two women, i'll never understand.

my sister-in-law went to bed on christmas eve while my brother wrapped all the gifts for their kids and set up everything up. he got up in the morning and made breakfast for everyone followed by christmas dinner. she updated her facebook profile.

I was simply rejecting the concept that a person's masculinity can be contained in a card purchased from spencer's gifts. And that masculinity can be revoked. I was doing it in a euphemistic way, but instead of inserting the f word, I substituted the freakin'. So Amen skips over A-f'ing-MEN to become A-freakin'-men,

A freakin' men I don't need no stinkin man card translates to.

I wholeheartedly agree with you Katy, I do not need a man card. I much prefer the sushi card.

Getting back to the original post here, and the whole non-pasta-cooking guy thing . . . back when I was in college, there were these frequent commecials for "McCain's Pasta Magic." (No relation to the Arizona senator, I don't think.) Anyway, it was pre-boiled pasta that came in plastic bags. "Just run it under hot water, and it's ready to serve!"

Now, bear in mind that this was the crowd of college students who were in the dorm's TV lounge to watch Star Trek - and we all were amazed that such a product would exist. "Who the hell can't boil spaghetti?" we wondered out loud.

If you can't match the domestic skills of a bunch of Star Trek watching college students, you pretty much fail by any standard of self-reliance.

---

-----
Over 4.5 years bike crash free.

It's only because she doesn't trust you to actually clean anything well enough to be considered clean in the first place.

Which means that you either acceptably screwed it up the first place to absolve yourself from responsibility forever, or she legitimately doesn't trust your cleaning skills in the first place.

---

AW

Some women like their men to do women's work around the house - aka you don't know what your role is in the marriage.

The other women are happy in their marriage.

The only thing hotter than a woman with a wrench is a woman with a tattoo ...

---

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went. - Will Rogers

Emery's Third Coast Triathlon | Tri Wisconsin Triathlon Team | Push Endurance | GLWR

So you complain that The Womens isn't very welcoming then you come over here and say that? I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt and pretend you are kidding. I'm wondering if any of the other women on here will do the same.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

>>
The only thing hotter than a woman with a wrench is a woman with a tattoo ... <<

What about a woman wrench with a tattoo?

clm

---

clm
Nashville, TN
https://twitter.com/ironclm | http://ironclm.typepad.com

I'm going to try hard to think you are kidding as well - otherwise that was a totally douche comment.

AKA - I'm smart enough to not marry an ass like you and know that my role is to take care of everything for my own self.

But to each relationship their own definition of roles and expectations - I expect my boyfriend to help me around the house as I bring just as much money and effort into the relationship - and he knows his role is to be my partner and not my bitch.

---

AW

A woman wrench with a tattoo? I believe this accurately sums it up (please don't ban me for this) ...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pXfHLUlZf4

---

If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went. - Will Rogers

Emery's Third Coast Triathlon | Tri Wisconsin Triathlon Team | Push Endurance | GLWR

I state an opinion, you don't like it, and then you threaten me with what? Deleting my post? My post was merely my opinion, and no I'm not kidding. Don't get yourself all twisted up about it.

And BTW, you don't represent all the women on the Womens Forum, as I'm sure not all are feminists, as some women on ST are traditionalists and others are not. And you are not a moderator on this or any other forum on ST, but merely a participant like myself.

Where the hell did I say your post should be deleted??? You're the one getting your panties in a twist. I actually think I was pretty civil about the whole thing.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

I don't know...I'm (male) the cook in the family (with family being my wife and myself). I only worked half days at work and spent the remainder of the days cooking and cleaning to have Christmas Eve and Christmas Day at our house. Granted I made everything from scratch so I could have saved a lot of time but I like to cook very health and with love (of shite there goes my man card...again). I never realized until this Christmas the lengths that my mother went through. She had to deal with four boys and do everything that I did. I can't imagine preparing what I did for Christmas and having to take care for four kids at the same time.

So many props to the parents (moms) out there that make time to make their spouse feel special, take care of their children and prepare a wonderful Christmas.

---

---

"your horse is too high" - tigerchik

Pay no attention to the little man behind the "Yahey" curtain.

People got bored with him in the LR, so he comes here to try to pick fights now.

---

Slowguy

(insert pithy phrase here...)

With four boys in my family and four sets of in-laws the holidays can be a mess or I should say "they have been a mess." We have finally gotten to the point where we have children in the households again (unfortunately Susie (wife) and I have not been fortunate enough to have our own), and it was really important to us to make Christmas special for them. Kids are a special thing to us - to continue with your rant, I wish their parents would take it as serious as we do. None the less, we did everything we could to provide amazing memories for them and we hope they pass such memories on to their children (or in our case nieces and nephews).

To go on and to balance what I am reading people say; for a lot of people it has become lazy, others it has become greedy or economical, and then there is some that still remember Christmas through the memories of events and spending time with loved ones. Susie and I spoil our nieces and nephews but feel that the best Christmas present we give them is the environment and memories from a warm and loving family.

---

---

"your horse is too high" - tigerchik

Going to be equal opportunity and post a few women rants. Maybe one of you can explain.

Here's my first rant. When I go to the store and buy an item for a gift, the salesperson wraps the item in tissue and puts it in a glossy paper bag with handles. All is good. A woman will then take the item out of the glossy paper bag and tissue and go buy another bag and tissue paper for like $8.00 and then wrap the item up again and discard the original bag and tissue. When a woman receives a gift in one of these bags with tissue, the bags are saved away in a cabinet to be "reused", but they never are because the bags in the cabinet are "not right for the occasion" and another bag must be purchased.

Second rant. Why in the world do you insist on washing the dishes by hand before putting them in the dishwasher??? Any decent dishwasher made in the last 20 years can clean 3 week old dried up elephant snot off any dish known to man. Look at the front of the device, it says "Dishwasher" right on it. That is a CLUE!!!

NOTE: Both of these rants are of the women creating extra and unnecessary work for themselves variety.

This guy at work complains about how his wife will go around and clean up the house the day before the housekeeper comes by.

---

--
01001010 01100101 01101110 01001000 01010011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01000100 01100101 01110110 01101001 01101100 00100000 00101000 01100001 01100011 01100011 01101111 01110010 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01101111 01100001 01100100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110011 01100101 00101001 00100001
http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

The first one I have not been privy too. I am a BIG believer in gift bags though. Why the hell should I wrap something when I can just drop it in a bag - and frankly, you're lucky if it even comes in a gift bag :)

The second, I actually give my dad a hard time about this one. He's all about the pre-wash wash. Drives me CRAZY! Though, to be fair, since they replaced the dishwasher last year he only does it with the baked on/crusty dishes now.

---

______________________________________
I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way

*snort* My idea of gift wrap is to hand off the gift in the same bag I left the store with it in. Often, that means a plastic grocery-style sac. Sometimes the gift was bought with other things so the sac isn't available. Then I usually just ask the recipient to close their eyes so I can hand it over as it is. The only exception is if I ordered the gift online. Then I might add the giftwrapping (or maybe not) and mail it directly.

As for washing dishes before putting them in the dishwasher... well I leave that habit to my father and stepfather.

---

There is no justice, there is only me. -- Death

In keeping with todays' theme of sending music clips to all and sundry on Facebook I offer the women of Slowtwitch this little gem.Wise words indeed courtesy of one Mr Higgins from a time long past.


www.youtube.com/watch?v=U6iktQ2y1Rs&feature=related

.

I like your style.

I usually just whip it out from behind my back, but I think I will add the request to close eyes in the future.

Full quote is "close your eyes and hold out your hands..."


I can always tell if a person trusts me by whether they're willing to do that. New friends tend to be very apprehensive:-D

---

There is no justice, there is only me. -- Death

I thought that sentence was going to be a lot funnier when I started reading it ;)

---

______________________________________
I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way

Why does this video have Portuguese subtitles???

And you really want to stay single forever, don't you. ;-)

clm

---

clm
Nashville, TN
https://twitter.com/ironclm | http://ironclm.typepad.com

I was thinking the exact same thing. Nick, you and I need to have a chat at UM. I think you need some pointers.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

Don't worry JenHS,I have completely given up on all that girlfriend searching stuff and will spend this year training for Ultraman.After Hawaii I have a new adventure planned and unless I find a girl wanting to ride and run huge distances in harsh conditions for about six months then it's single-town for me in 2010 as well.



.

Now that's a personal ad!

"Single guy seeking girl wanting to ride and run huge distances in harsh conditions for about six months."

That's the kind of ad I'd respond to. But, then again, I'm not normal.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

didnt feel like COOKING

I've seen this phenomenon before. He can do it, he just wants YOU to do it. It's learned at an early age. My GF's 10 year old son does this. We were having dinner one night and the little feller tells (more like an order) his mom to get him a glass of milk. She tells him that he knows where it is and to get it himself. He sits there for about a minute, still eating. She asks him "don't you want some milk?" He says "Not if I have to get up and get it." LOL

For once, I'm going to stick up for what Yahey has said. He said it in a bit of an obnoxious way to get a rise out of the women here, but I think most of us would agree that there's nothing wrong with a family where the wife does all of the traditional women's work as long as that's what the husband *and* the wife want. It's about finding balance in your house, not about dividing chores until they are 50% each. I have a degree in computer science and am a self-employed software consultant. I'm also the sports nut in my family and have always been a big believer in strong women. But, I also do almost all of the household and child rearing duties because that's the way we want it to be.

I'm going to be a traitor here and say that I have no rants about men. I have been able to relieve much stress in my life by doing things the way my husband does. I now take care of me and my family first and not worry about everyone else. I take a good hard look at things that I used to think were essential and decide if it's really the right thing for me and my family. If not, then I say screw it.

The problem is that Yahey did not say that every couple should work out the arrangement that works for them (that I agree with). He made a normative statement that certain duties should always be women's work and that other duties should always be men's work (I guess because that's what God intended), and then indicated that there is some kind of nefarious plot among "feminists" to make men do "women's work" and thereby take away their masculinity. This is just silly as a normative statement. I agree that every couple needs to work out their own arrangement, but Yahey thinks that there is one only acceptable type of arrangement for everybody.

Now the nice thing is that for the most part, what Yahey thinks has no impact on me. In a sense it might be helpful because when most contemporary women run into a yutz like that, they appreciate those of us that don't have our heads up our 1950's asses.

I love to cook and I always do laundry. I clean the bathroom, my wife cleans the floors. And when things are a big deal to her (decorating for Christmas), she takes care of about 80% of it; if she asks for help ont he remaining 20%, I help because its important to her. And vice versa, we handle my priorities the same way (she often goes to pick me up after a long ride).

I just don't understand these kinds of battles.

The problem is that Yahey did not say that every couple should work out the arrangement that works for them (that I agree with). He made a normative statement that certain duties should always be women's work and that other duties should always be men's work (I guess because that's what God intended), and then indicated that there is some kind of nefarious plot among "feminists" to make men do "women's work" and thereby take away their masculinity. This is just silly as a normative statement. I agree that every couple needs to work out their own arrangement, but Yahey thinks that there is one only acceptable type of arrangement for everybody.

Exactly. And, if you noticed what I said, I was completely restrained and didn't attack, I just stated that I hoped he was kidding and that I wondered how many other women would give him the benefit of the doubt.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

Exactly. And, if you noticed what I said, I was completely restrained and didn't attack, I just stated that I hoped he was kidding and that I wondered how many other women would give him the benefit of the doubt.

You keep going back to how you were restrained in replying to my post. Why wouldn't you be? I didn't state anything that was offensive or attack anyone. And why would anyone have to give me the benefit of the doubt? I meant what I said.

A lot of women really believe that men don't think like me, but don't kid yourself, very few guys don't - in reality. Yes, men help and work around the house, raise kids, and do lot's of other chores, but don't believe for a second that thousands of years of traditional roles have evaporated. It is bred in us men. Just as women want to have careers etc. and suddenly one day wake up and want to have a family and kids, etc. These are very powerful roles that genetically we have in our systems. And as a previous poster stated, of course people are free to choose what makes them happy, but just keep in mind that once a couple is married and have kids then many many want to have those traditional roles - even if when they were young they did not see those roles as appealing.

Well I send my thanks to the Great Flying Spaghetti Monster that I was raised to not beleive in those idiotic "traditional" roles. I am the ONLY cook in my household. My wife has cooked for me exactly three times in 11 years of marriage and I would like it to stay that way. Tradition be damned, I am simply a WAY better cook.

As for all the varied rants about mens and womens ... does nobody communicate? I swear if my wife or I have an issue, we say to the other: "Stop f..king doing that before I kick you in the face". It is somewhat facetious, but with a couple of black belts in the household, you never know ...

On a serious note, I have noticed over the last several months that a number of household chores which I have never even been aware existed (maybe on a subconscious level) have come into focus. My wife has been more or less bed/couchridden for eight months. Every house plant died. There are fur balls the size of tumbleweeds blowing across the hardwood(three dogs, 2 cats). All 18 hummingbird feeders froze. The cat box ... well I moved it outside hehe.

---

===============
Proud member of the MSF (Maple Syrup Mafia)

Gender roles are just suggestions but whatever works for the unique couple is what works best.

---

--
01001010 01100101 01101110 01001000 01010011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01000100 01100101 01110110 01101001 01101100 00100000 00101000 01100001 01100011 01100011 01101111 01110010 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01101111 01100001 01100100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110011 01100101 00101001 00100001
http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

So you're saying the desire to repair or maintain cars is a genetic thing that guys have evolved over thousands (or even millions) of years?

I hear you on this. I love my wife, but with the exception of a few things, I am a much better cook. I cook for my own benefit (and she likes it too).

I also hear you about the hidden chores that I didn't even know about. My wife is laid up as we are expecting twins and a lot of things have gone undone. However, earlier in December when I was swamped at work she got a view of life without me (we ate a lot of take-out that week).

I'm glad your genes don't work in my relationship. And I'm glad that, because I think the way I do, I'm able to ignore or alleviate the douchebags from my life.

Oh, but I should shut my mouth, give up my salary, grab a discloth and get my ass in the kitchen...and take my shoes off and get pregnant.

Yes, it is our genetic role to bear children, it's in the historical evolutionary roles for men to be the hunters and protectors...but somehow, somewhere something got screwy and we womenfolk learned to take care of shit ourselves because somewhere along the line there was an obvious need. I'm thinking - even though you might not be the first - you certainly might serve as evidence for that need.....but excuse me...I should go cook and "know my role"....

And if you dare to suggest that the man I choose to have a relationship with is somehow wrong or evolutionarily wrong - because in my relationship my role happens to bring in more money AND I still get to clean (because I don't trust him to do a good enough job - like I believe I previously suggested of a certain aforementioned piece of evidence) - I'll let him settle the score about who wears pants and who pays bills and what difference that makes.

And I still think Sluglas' wife rocks.

---

AW

I say put his post back up...I had a brilliant reply almost ready to go...

Feel sorry for him all you want, YaHoo, he gets to sleep with me, he gets to carry a gun and arrest assholes, he serves our country and protects assholes like you (despite my pleas otherwise) and still manages to clean up after himself, wipe his own ass and feed himself. He wants me on top and I'm not picky. In his book, he's pretty much got it made.

Fortunately for my pocketbook, he does pay for his own toys and gun habit. Fortunately for his, I pay for my bikes and races.

I have little need for his nuts, he can keep them (he uses them better) and he's 100% of the man I'll never want to be. And to get back to your original comment - and why we all started bitching at you in the first place - our relationship works because that's the way WE want it. He kills the spiders, I usually wash the dishes. If your wife enjoys living with your nuts in her mouth - who am I to save her?

And since it's a women's forum....shouldn't you feel oddly out of place? (No offense to those that play nice in the sandbox)

---

AW

I think she rocks too.

Oh snap!!!!

I like you.

---

===============
Proud member of the MSF (Maple Syrup Mafia)

I have one!

My boyfriend is very tall and insists on sitting down to tie his shoes. He thinks that his feet are too far away for him to lean over and tie his shoes like regular people.

Now that its winter, every time he wanders away from the doormat and into the dining room to tie his shoes, he drips dirty water and leaves a trail of rocks behind him. I have had to vacuum and mop the floor after him every day this week. Last night I asked him to stop this and this morning as he was leaving for the pool I caught him doing it again!

See, we are a complex gender, this thread is up to 4 pages and you still can't figure us out. I could start and end a thread about women with one word, "nuts".

---

___________________________________________________
I'm not a complete idiot, some of the parts are missing.

Such a typical guy :-)

The girls were doing some bonding over what a pain in the a** their S.O.s are. That's how we connect, talking. Boys, they grunt, nod their heads and roll their eyes. That pretty much covers an entire conversation right there.

See, I have this all figured out!

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

Boys, they grunt, nod their heads and roll their eyes.

Jeez Jen, do you really think we are that one dimensional?









Don't forget we also fart and laugh about it. ;)

---

===============
Proud member of the MSF (Maple Syrup Mafia)

"Boys, they grunt, nod their heads and roll their eyes. That pretty much covers an entire conversation right there. "

I'm confused. What does the eye rolling cover that the grunt and nod doesn't?

---

Slowguy

(insert pithy phrase here...)

But you never catch us checking out your chest! It's all part of the plan.

---

--
01001010 01100101 01101110 01001000 01010011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01000100 01100101 01110110 01101001 01101100 00100000 00101000 01100001 01100011 01100011 01101111 01110010 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01101111 01100001 01100100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110011 01100101 00101001 00100001
http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

What does the eye rolling cover that the grunt and nod doesn't?

"Women are nuts."

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

""Women are nuts.""

Oh, trust me, we have grunts that say that without the need for eye rolling.

---

Slowguy

(insert pithy phrase here...)

But you never catch us checking out your chest! It's all part of the plan.[/reply] Yes, we do. Just about every time. we just choose to not bust you on it...most of the time.

---

AW

That's a typical male reaction. Just solve the problem already. :p

Khai!!! They don't want you to solve the problem! Just LISTEN! :)

---

-------------------------------------
Steve Perkins

Exactly my point, bro...

Exactly my point.

---

<If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough>
Get Fitter!
Proud member of the Smartasscrew, MONSTER CLUB
Get your FIX today?

Well duh. We are smart enough to solve the problem for ourselves.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

Then why do you all invest so much energy in complaining instead of just doing the fixing.

Because why do WE always have to be the ones FIXING? If we notice the problem and identify the problem for you - and YOU are the ones causing the problem....shouldn't you be the one FIXING the problem?

(Note: I realize the answer here is that YOU don't realize that it's a problem until SHE starts bitching - and then it really isn't YOUR problem....but that circles back to the LISTENING and CARING part...you should want to help and compromise and help keep us happy...and we'll generally quit bitching....at least about that particular problem...=)

---

AW

Because why do WE always have to be the ones FIXING? If we notice the problem and identify the problem for you - and YOU are the ones causing the problem....shouldn't you be the one FIXING the problem?


+10,000

Exactly right.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

not only is this guy hillarious....I think he's right on the money.

worth a watch: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuMZ73mT5zM

---

____________________________
Life is Short...Run Long

Because why do WE always have to be the ones FIXING? If we notice the problem and identify the problem for you - and YOU are the ones causing the problem....shouldn't you be the one FIXING the problem?

I think you're answering a different questions. If you WANT us to fix the problem, then we're more than happy to. Thatwhat we do. It's when you tell us you DON'T want us to fix the problem where things start to break down.

---

-------------------------------------
Steve Perkins

How things should go:
Her: Honey, I have a problem. Can you fix it?
Him: Sure, what's broke? I'll do my best to fix it.

How things actually go:
Her: /doesn't talk
Her: /still doesn't talk 5 minutes later
Her: /still doesn't talk 10 minutes late but starts sighing
Him: Honey, what's wrong?
Her: Nuthing /said very pouty
Him: OK.
Her: /rolls eyes
Her: /gets up and storms off about 30 seconds later
Him: /gets the image in his head of the coyote right after he has ran off the cliff, looks down, and realizes that he's about to fall to his death
Him: Honey, what's wrong? I know there is something wrong.
Her: NOTHING IS WRONG YOU INSENSITIVE CLOD!!!
Her: /locks herself in the bedroom sobbing
Him: Honey, can I at least have a pillow and a blanket so that I can sleep on the couch tonight?

---

--
01001010 01100101 01101110 01001000 01010011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01000100 01100101 01110110 01101001 01101100 00100000 00101000 01100001 01100011 01100011 01101111 01110010 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01101111 01100001 01100100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110011 01100101 00101001 00100001
http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

This is the problem guys are facing all over the world. A problem exists. We may or may not be aware of it, but it does indeed exist. Guys are by and large pretty dense, and don't take hints well. We need to be told, and in no uncertain terms. No hints. No "you ought to know". No BS. Just tell us in plain English. Maybe a couple of times. :p If you were to assign a priority rating to the issue, this would be helpful. Once we've been notified that a problem does indeed exist, we still don't know if you want us to fix it. Or if you just want to talk about it. Or both. Or neither. The thing is, we don't know and we aren't intuitive enough to figure it out. You need to tell us. Tell us about the problem. Tell us if you'd like us to resolve the problem, or if you just want to talk about it. Or if you want to talk about it first, and then have us fix it. Or if you've already fixed it but still want to talk about it. Then give us a reasonable timeframe in which to solve the problem (if that is what you want). Then leave us alone long enough to fix it. Then, because we're all pretty much dogs anyway, a treat would be nice. :D

---

<If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough>
Get Fitter!
Proud member of the Smartasscrew, MONSTER CLUB
Get your FIX today?

Khai, that would be signature line material if it wasn't so verbose. :)

---

-------------------------------------
Steve Perkins

It will probably be necessary to buy an new outfit and shoes to wear while doing all this.

HAHA!!! LMAO!!!

---

Come crawling faster

You forgot that we need to get together a bunch of friends, have brunch, check 7 different stores in 4 different malls, go back to the first store we visited and buy the first chair we saw. Then the BFFS all have to come over and help me figure out how exactly to angle it correctly in the entryway. Then we go out for drinks afterwards to celebrate.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

Jen-
Just so we're clear on this one....the title of the thread WAS Not to scare away the visit Men, but...(post your men rants here)....so exactly how did it wind up being thread of MEN bitching about WOMEN?

Just curious...because they're being awfully "verbose" about the things that we do wrong, and I think that we've made our points/rants/bitches fairly concise. I don't even think we were necessarily looking for the answers to the universe when this started, but more a place to vent w/o the men "bitching" about us "bitching"....right?

Just wanted to make sure I was on the right thread...or if it really needed to be renamed "Not to scare away the visiting Men who are bitching and correcting and pointing out the flaws of the Women who are posting their men rants here in the Womens forum".....but, I'm just checking.... =)

Love you guys!

---

AW

Absolutely. I didn't mean for my post to sound like bitching, just making fun of my own personal process. I can see how it came out that way though.

Yeah, I too find it funny how the men are jumping in here to defend themselves.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

Ahahahahaha!!!!!!! OMG...I am spitting out my rice reading this. TOO FUNNY and true!!
Jessica

---

Jessica

Even funnier after so many men bitched about a womens' forum in the first place and now lots of mens are posting here. ;-)

clm

---

clm
Nashville, TN
https://twitter.com/ironclm | http://ironclm.typepad.com

Wasn't pointing fingers, just laughing about the boys....

I'm the queen of bitch, darling....no worries about sounding bitchy, catty or otherwise mean...it is, after all according to the men, what we excel at and why we're here!

Now Jessica should probably pick up her rice....=)

On the opposite end of bitching - that guy I sometimes claim as my boyfriend managed to snag 3 mice in traps at his own home. What a great mighty hunter....ha. He's entirely proud of himself - and I didn't even point out the problem. Proof that they can sometimes think on their own!!!! But to go along with the earlier chair/snow/tall issue - at 6'8", we have had the discussion about how far away his feet are and I think the solution he came up with is to not ever tie shoes....

---

AW

So I suppose we'll presently be hearing a rant from your significant other: "Dammit, now I've got to figure out how to fix a computer keyboard that's got little bits of rice lodged in it."

---

-----
Over 4.5 years bike crash free.

The mens don't understand the womens. Waaaaaaahhhhh!!



Oh sorry, wrong thread :-)

---

---

"Here's how you run a marathon. Step 1: You start running. Step 2: There is no step 2." - Barney (How I Met Your Mother)

This is the problem guys are facing all over the world. A problem exists. We may or may not be aware of it, but it does indeed exist. Guys are by and large pretty dense, and don't take hints well. We need to be told, and in no uncertain terms. No hints. No "you ought to know". No BS. Just tell us in plain English. Maybe a couple of times. :p If you were to assign a priority rating to the issue, this would be helpful. Once we've been notified that a problem does indeed exist, we still don't know if you want us to fix it. Or if you just want to talk about it. Or both. Or neither. The thing is, we don't know and we aren't intuitive enough to figure it out. You need to tell us. Tell us about the problem. Tell us if you'd like us to resolve the problem, or if you just want to talk about it. Or if you want to talk about it first, and then have us fix it. Or if you've already fixed it but still want to talk about it. Then give us a reasonable timeframe in which to solve the problem (if that is what you want). Then leave us alone long enough to fix it. Then, because we're all pretty much dogs anyway, a treat would be nice. :D


I just had to quote this because it's brilliant!!

Even funnier after so many men bitched about a womens' forum in the first place and now lots of mens are posting here. ;-)

You know we've reached the big time when swimfan is posting here, and behaving.

Deep down we all know swimmy's a big softie.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

" We need to be told, and in no uncertain terms. No hints. No "you ought to know". No BS. Just tell us in plain English."

There's a damn good reason that an instruction manual is included with every piece of technical equipment we buy. If we're not expected to be intuitive enough to figure out how to set up HDTV without line by line instructions, how can we be expected to be intuitive enough to figure out the fandangled maze of circuitry that is the female psyche?

---

Slowguy

(insert pithy phrase here...)

There's a damn good reason that an instruction manual is included with every piece of technical equipment we buy.

I don't know what world you live in but I haven't met a guy yet who reads an instruction manual, especially when it comes to electronics. It is us womens who save the day by reading the thing then swooping in after the mens stomps from the room, foaming at the mouth and saying "there is a piece missing, I'm sure of it."

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

"I don't know what world you live in but I haven't met a guy yet who reads an instruction manual, especially when it comes to electronics. It is us womens who save the day by reading the thing then swooping in after the mens stomps from the room, foaming at the mouth and saying "there is a piece missing, I'm sure of it." "

Exactly. Hard evidence that, unless we follow the insturctions line by line, we're never going to get anywhere. And yet when it comes to womens and your inner most thoughts,...we're expected to just figure it out? You ladies should know better by now.

---

Slowguy

(insert pithy phrase here...)

Jen:

I ALWAYS reas the instruction manual. Of course, that's AFTER I've spent 4 days and nights without eating or sleeping trying to get these things set up without reading them. :)

---

-------------------------------------
Steve Perkins

I had not read your response to my post until now, and all I can say is "you stay classy" AWARE...

(Rolls eyes)

"He likes me on top while he's out saving the world... He's lucky to have me.." TMI

Let me rephrase my previously ignored assessment of character - you're a pompous douchebag. You have no idea the amount of class I carry myself with, nor the social standing that I have.

If you have the audacity to use quotation marks, implying that you are quoting directly something that someone has said - let alone someone that has a degree in journalism and English - you should do it correctly.

What I typed was, "He wants me on top and I'm not picky. In his book, he's pretty much got it made."
What you typed was, "He likes me on top while he's out saving the world... He's lucky to have me.."

While I don't disagree entirely with your statement, he IS lucky to have me, I don't quite think I would enjoy being on top WHILE he is out saving the world. What happens in my bedroom, thankfully, you are neither a part of nor welcome to watch. You implied in a previous statement, which no one else but me got to see as our moderators pulled the post, that you felt sorry for my boyfriend becuase our relationship isn't like yours (at which point my statement of your wife living with your balls in her mouth came into play). I was simply stating why, in our own eyes, our relationship works. It wasn't a statement up for debate.

But apparently I shall grab my dishcloth and shut my mouth, women aren't allowed to tell it like it is lest I be labeled as social scum. I know where the dessert spoon goes, how to fold the napkins and that I should never be expected to shake hands with douchebags like you. Roll your eyes at my curtsey, ass.

---

AW

AWARE, you need to read up a bit on what a troll is. The best thing to do is to not feed them and to just ignore them. There are some people that sit behind their keyboards and smile when people call them douchebags online. Don't give them a reason to smile.

---

--
01001010 01100101 01101110 01001000 01010011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01000100 01100101 01110110 01101001 01101100 00100000 00101000 01100001 01100011 01100011 01101111 01110010 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01101111 01100001 01100100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110011 01100101 00101001 00100001
http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

YaHey is a classic example of what Eric is saying. We know it. The Lavender Room knows it. His family probably knows it. Just don't feed him... hopefully he'll starve and die.

---

______________________________________
I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way

Indeed, my friend, indeed. Oh to have weasely little troll-like eyes with which to see the world....

I laughed when describing this thread to the boyfriend, who thought an unspecified douchebag's opinion was "absolute craziness" in between snorts of laughter. He briefly entertained the idea of buying me an apron before realizing he would be strangled with the strings. He did, however, completely agree with the aforementioned description of his life and affirm that he's pretty much "got it made, eh?"

---

AW

Hate to tell you, but no one pulled my post. I deleted my post after I changed my mind about responding to you.

Group hug with Eric? I think he's a little sensitive and needs one.

BTW, you would have physically assaulted your BF if he would have given you an apron and asked you to cook for him? Like I said, stay classy.

You hear something? The pitter-patter of little ugly feet, possibly some pointy ears?

On a bright note - not quite a rant - I can say that we have established an expectation of the wet/snowy shoes and where they go in my home and I believe it will work out well with the boys. The dogs, on the other hand, haven't quite mastered wiping their feet.

---

AW

Hehehe, good one.

---

--
01001010 01100101 01101110 01001000 01010011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01000100 01100101 01110110 01101001 01101100 00100000 00101000 01100001 01100011 01100011 01101111 01110010 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01101111 01100001 01100100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110011 01100101 00101001 00100001
http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

Oh, one more thing, even if you acknowledge the presence of these little, ugly creatures, you are still leaving breadcrumbs around for them to snack on.

---

--
01001010 01100101 01101110 01001000 01010011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01010100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01000100 01100101 01110110 01101001 01101100 00100000 00101000 01100001 01100011 01100011 01101111 01110010 01100100 01101001 01101110 01100111 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110010 01101111 01100001 01100100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110011 01100101 00101001 00100001
http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

Must be a slow nite in that I can only take so much Obama-mania on TV.

So this thread is great. Most of the womens complaints appear to be quite legit.

At this point my conclusion is that none of the WOMENS have any complaints about:

1. Guys spending more money on bikes than diamonds for them
2. Guys generally spending more money on accessories for their bikes than anything they spend on their wives
3. Guys spending more money on race nutrition than on dinners at nice restaurants for them
4. Guys leaving their sports gear all over the house
5. Guys spending too much time training
6. Guys spending too much time on road trips with the buddies at tris, football games or hockey games

It appears that I am home free and what I thought were borderline pushing my luck are well under the radar for behavior warranting a rant.

OK, back to the regular programming

Geez... even Dev is getting involved in the womens? Well, I'm here to tell you... we all (mostly) do the stuff on your list. Now ask a non-athlete womens if those bother them. I suspect that will warrant VERY different results ;)

---

______________________________________
I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way

Welcome Dev, glad we could educate.

For the first 3, most of us can pay for ourselves. Diamonds are overrated.

Dirty workout clothes, not great.

If you don't have kids, taking off for training is perfectly acceptable as long as no restriction is placed on her training/traveling/socializing. With kids, a whole new ruleset applies and I have no idea how to advise you on that.

You are pretty close though and nothing you got wrong can't be fixed quickly.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

I better go boil the pasta if I want the aforementioned trangressions to stay under the radar (or at least tolerated)...for the record, when Desertdude rented a condo at Wildflower, I got the cook's job for feeding 8 people at dinner daily...even after racing Wildflower, and riding 60 minute back to the condo. Cooking I am cool with, football yes, barbeque yes, laundry yes, cutting grass yes, dishes yes...just don't ask me to fix anything that is not a bike or skis. I figure I can make more money (net) doing other income generating stuff and hire someone to do the fixer upper jobs...at least that's what Adam Smith (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adam_smith) wrote about and that's why I'd rather hire a specialist to to do jobs I suck at...my wife knows that too and just uses a phone to call someone to fix things that will never get fixed if left to me!

I know, I am shocked to see him over here posting!

(OT: I mailed that article to you yesterday. Still puzzling over how funny your Canadian addresses look.)

---

maybe she's born with it, maybe it's chlorine
If you're injured and need some sympathy, PM me and I'm very happy to write back.
disclaimer: PhD not MD

I've got agree with Jen and D, most of the "problems" you list we do too!

My boy thinks it's awful that:
I have so many dirty workout clothes in my bedroom,
My dogs are allowed to sleep in the room,
I spend so much money on entry fees, food and spent so much getting my bike ready for Silverman,
We travel so far to race (hurt so bad) and get nothing back monetarily,
And he doesn't understand that yes, pasta works as a meal 3x/day if need be.

He's a gem, but he's no athlete. I don't understand why he can spend so much money on guns (he only shoots one at a time) and camoflauge (why do you need multiple getups of the SAME pattern?) and cameras to put on trees (look for their tracks, don't take pictures of them) and why it's important to mount dead things on the wall. So, I guess we each have our own vices and as long as they keep us out of each other's hair (and pocketbooks) we're fairly even....

More diamonds would be nice though; they are overrated but at least they don't depreciate.

---

AW

I love the Womens forum - I just never understood why it wasn't "The Respect" forum or why no "Mens" forum.

---

---

"your horse is too high" - tigerchik

Hey there. First time posting...
Looking for advise/rant. Im dating a mid 20 IM, aspiring to go pro. I have also begun training for a few tri's this year.
He is having a difficult time finding balance between me and the training (it's either all us or all training). I am honestly low maintenance and dont ask for much. It has gotten to the point of him only training and working and I have been left completely in the dust. He states that if he keeps dating me he will get more atatched and his goals will suffer. He is a great guy and I fully support him to the best of my knowledge and understanding of this sport, and understand sacrifice within reason. But, I am a paramedic who works long shift work, has another pt job, keeps a neat house, a social life, and makes time to train most days. So, I do get long hard work and how to balance... Any thoughts??

Mid 20's tri guy here... I might fall into a category similar to your situation minus the going pro part. One thing that helped my fiance and I is living together. I wake up at 4:45 and don't get home til 9:00 most days between training and 2 jobs. It's nice to come home and eat, watch tv, and catch up before bed. The weekends are the time where we get to spend most of our time together. Not sure how the going pro deal works into this, but right now we have the same long term goal...save money!! We are saving for a house and wedding so it's the light at the end of the tunnel that we are both "training" for. I guess my advice would be to see if you two have the same long term goals. If so, then that gives you something to look forward to. Even at the pro level, there's more to life than triathlon. For a successful relationship, you need to be on the same page.

I hate to be the one to say this, but it would appear that he's made his choice.

sorry

---

<If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough>
Get Fitter!
Proud member of the Smartasscrew, MONSTER CLUB
Get your FIX today?

Yup. He has made his choice. Nothing wrong with him having those goals but you shouldn't twist yourself in a knot trying to squeeze into his limited free time. If he wants you in his life he has to make room for you. Don't settle for less than what you are worth.

---

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce