Iâ€™m not going to speak about the death of your uncle. Nothing that I could say would help you with that.
About your bio-dad and your half â€śsiblingsâ€ť...
They arenâ€™t your family. They share some of your DNA.
You can turn them into family if you so choose or you can keep them as just some people who are strangers that have some of your DNA.
I met my bio-mom when I was 18 (I sought her out and found her). It was a rather anti-climatic meeting. A few years later I met my bio-dad. Again, rather anti-climatic. No contact for 25 years and then bio-mom found me on Facebook, then later bio-dad did as well. Iâ€™m no longer on Facebook but we all follow each other on IG. Between the two of them they have several other offspring.
And that is it. We â€ślikeâ€ť each otherâ€™s posts.
No harm. No foul. No real relationship. No expectations. No disappointments.
My sister on the other hand found her bio-parents, has frequent contact with them and itâ€™s never ending stress and drama for her. All the bullshit we went through with our real parents (the ones who raised us) and now she has to go and find another set of fucked up people to call â€śfamilyâ€ť?
There are reasons why people give up their children for adoption. And while the act is an ultimate form of altruism the reasoning behind it is never good.
Best to let sleeping dogs lie, IMHO.
As much as I look like my mother and said to resemble my father, I cannot comment on adoption, I agree with this post. My father past nearly 43 weeks ago and am an emotion wreck because he and I had (still have in my mind) the greatest partnership anyone could ever imagine. I have seen and spoken to my mother about a handful of times in the last 25 years. It does not bother me because we have never been partners like with my father. I know my mother stews in drama that would be toxic to my life and bring me down. Should she pass before me (with my knowledge of knowing of illness, etc.), I know it may be sad for a short period of time but without regrets. If I found out months or years later, life may be easier to press on with.
Other than one aunt and one of my father daughters (from a previous marriage) The day of his passing, I have and will not speak to any of my family members because they are all like my mother and will undoubtedly come around looking for something. With them, I will definitely have no regrets for people not worth caring for. It is best for us all to remain the way we are.
DISH is how we do it.