replying to last post.....

This is great! Lots of fun to read through some of the posts. I have many "dirty secrets". But don't we all :-)

These are just a few random ones off the top of my head....

1) In 2018 I went through a solid year of painful laser hair removal and electrolysis so I could sit on the bike for a long time and have more comfort as opposed to painful pubic hair digging into sensitive skin. Now I look like a middle-aged porn star
2) I still hate riding my tri bike in the aero position for a long time. My neck still screams. I rode the second half of IM Copenhagen in horns my neck was so bad. (I've had several bike fits)
3) I still don't have a power meter
4) I have worn the same biking socks for several weeks riding the trainer in my basement. Cats loved those socks. I hung them on the bike and they were good to go for the next session. Trying to be better about this
5) I blow snot rockets onto the floor of my pain cave riding my bike when I forget a tissue or towel. My husband hates it.
6) Watching Ironman videos makes me want to poo. And I usually do make a trip to the bathroom(nerves?)
7) I'm not too stinky after workouts like my husband so I can go a few times before I wash my workout clothes. If they fail the sniff test, they get washed. If they don't they go in a certain "bin" to wear again. Although trying to do better with bike shorts!
8) I thought for sure I was going to shit my pants on the last 5K of IM Whistler in 2019. I had miserable nutrition issues on that race. I wanted to die.
9) 2020 and 2021 am blaming every little physical ailment and set back presently on menopause.
10) I have bad days were I secretly hope my races will get canceled again in 2021 but overall I do want to see what I can do in my 50s.

ETA: I miss my 40s. 50s suck. So F'ing much!

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Death is easy....peaceful. Life is harder.

I just went through the many posts I've made here and this one is the funniest. (even the misspelling)

Glad someone recently revived this.
-Im doing my first tris this year for the first time in 5 years. I haven't completed A race in about 7 or 8. Not sure. DNF my last.
-I have a weird lust/wanting problem with bikes. I always want the best etc and get hyper focused on the bike and equipment for some reason. Weird.
-I like training alone. Especially in the winter.
I enjoy the workouts on the trainer and not having to worry about getting hit.
-I feel like ST has gotten stale. The posts aren't as deep as they used to and I feel like a lot of ppl have left.
-I am pretty sure that trek is releasing a bike soon for tt or tri. Just think they will either rename it (to justify the claim they aren't making a disc speed concept).
- after getting a used SC and buying new he'd jet blacks I'm glad I didn't get a disc wheel bike for tri. I hate the thru axles. Dumb. I want to change tires fast.
-i get annoyed that work gets in the way of training.
-i love golf and doing house projects and mowing the lawn. I'm weird like that.

Me too! Awesome thread.

• I was banned from ST in my first week. I had googled my company and stumbled into a ST thread about us. I got excited, made an account and shared a bunch of relevant info, including linking out to my products
• 2020 is my first experience on forums.
• I have not done a triathlon.
• I did the swim & bike leg in a sprint tri and tagged my wife's bro, 2 minutes behind my wife. He lost 7 minutes to her on the run leg. We lost to her by 9 minutes.
• My two best bike race results have come while riding my wife's bike.
• I frequently draft my wife for entire 50+ mile rides.
• Sometimes I tell her I'm dropping. Sometimes I don't tell her and I drop anyway.
• My longest run ever was 10 miles until 2021. I stress fractured my foot on that run back in 2008. I fractured my other foot in 2017 by sprinting on a stress fracture. Both were my heel.
• In 2021 I ran 12 miles, while attempting my first half marathon. I refractured the 2017 fracture. I still have not run more than 12 miles in my life. I have an Achilles heel, so to speak.
• I don't own a TT/tri bike.
• My personal training style can be described best as "inconsistent weekend warrior." If I were more consistent/intelligent, I'd probably avoid re-injury.

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Dr. Alex Harrison | Founder & CEO | Sport Physiology & Performance PhD
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My dirty secrect is that I applied to be on Australian Survivor and have totally changed my training,dumping 80% of my tri-geek stuff and I am having way,way,waaaaaaaay more fun!
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Uh yeah, #5 is quite disgusting. Seriously???

That was the 2nd Season, right?

I was so amazed by Season One, that I too applied, and was in the middle of making my audition video with the help of my neighbors [who already thought I was weird for being a triathlete in the first place] when I realized that if I was chosen - and I surely would be - I'd be on set in Oz when our baby would be born, so I shit-canned it

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

the point of dirty secrets is that this is a criticism-free zone. and i find #5 charming, actually.

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Dan Empfield
aka Slowman

Lol, fair enough.

I haven’t raced in two years. Last year a shoulder injury and subsequent surgery plus COVID closures of the pool convinced me to to stop swimming and become a duathlete. Last fall a neuroma popped up in my foot that will not go away making want to give up running over surgery*. Now I’m pretty much a cyclist but don’t like riding out outside and have become a Zwift junkie.


*just saw the podiatrist Thursday for my 3rd injection. We’re trying some physical therapy but if that doesn’t work then surgery seems inevitable. Getting old sucks.

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The secret of a long life is you try not to shorten it.
-Nobody

You missed the point of this thread. Of course I know it's gross. This thread is not meant to invite criticism or judgement. Now if I started a thread about the topic of blowing snot rockets in our own pain caves, then that is different. I would expect some folks to tell me that is disgusting. lol

In fairness, it's not like I'm blowing huge green colored snot globules onto my floor. I'm a small female (light and wimpy clear colored nose spray, nothing grand) and it's really not worse than someone sneezing on my floor. And my floors do get steam mopped. AND it's only when I forget to have a towel or tissue handy. But it's not as funny and entertaining if I mention that I like using my steam mop right? ;-)

Thanks to Dan for sticking up for me :-)

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Death is easy....peaceful. Life is harder.

Thanks for "airing your dirties", gave me a chuckle more than once :-)

My bowels DEMAND that I drop a deuce in the race port-o-john before almost every race, even if I hit a rest stop 30 minutes before arrival. Example:Today I was doing a cross-country running race 10 minutes from my house (lucky) I went to the bathroom at my house and drove to the race with time for a quick 25 minute warm-up. 10 minutes into the warmup, it was time to drop off the sandbags for elevation, if you know what I mean.

Triingtotrain,

My apologies, I hadn't read this thread before (at least not that I can remember) and did in fact kind of miss the point. Snot rocket away! :)

Cheers

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Yeah,the season you are talking about was Season Two of Survivor (the original US version) filmed in 2001 not too far from Cairns and was a tough season for the castaways..

The one I am currently training for is Season Six of Australian Survivor which is to be filmed near the outback town of Cloncurry,Queensland in around October/November this year. I won't know if I have been accepted for a couple of months so I am busy training for a whole new skillset and studying Australian Aboriginal bush food while binge watching all the past Survivor seasons from around the world.
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I've done #5 and 7, although I've ridden Zwift 3 times this year. I can't stand riding Zwift anymore and ride on the Velodrome instead.

I really need to cancel that subscription.

- I am glad that 2020 was canceled because it gave me the headspace I needed after a horrible 2019 season. Also because apparently I had been overtraining since my first IM, and my body starting doing what it was supposed to be doing all along again. Except the whole "be productive in the reproductive department" thing. Menopause in your mid-thirties is a mega mindfuck.

- I am allergic to the state I live in and I am unapologetic for being a disgusting fleshfaucet on the bike and run outdoors.

- Haven't climaxed on the bike in a while, but that's always a fun surprise.

- I have had body image issues forever, also thanks to my mother. For high school graduation, she insisted that I wear a dress with sleeves so they would "hide my fat arms". No matter what weight I was at the time, even if you could count every rib in my torso, she always said I could be 10lbs lighter. She was never happy with how I looked, even when she passed away. I could hear her voice in my head telling me I needed to lose weight at her funeral.

- I finally purchased a swimsuit for the first time in a decade that has nothing to do with swimming. I don't care if I have no where else to wear it than on the lounge chair on my deck.

- As much fun as I have doing tris, I miss playing field hockey. I think just for the contact sport element of it. I miss being able to bodycheck opponents several inches taller than me into the ground. Or "accidentally" letting a ball fly past their ear when they've pissed me off.

- I still haven't forgiven my father for scheduling his wedding for the same week as my first IM. Or for not bothering to support me through it because his now-wife didn't understand why it was so important to me. I wore my IM bracelet to the wedding and got chewed out for "ruining pictures with that garish thing". But he's also a racist and decided that my relationship didn't serve him anymore and I haven't spoken to him in over two years.

- I grind my teeth so hard that I have to wear a mouthguard when I sleep. I also routinely shred the inside of my lip by gnawing on it.

- I don't wear deodorant. 95% of the time I don't need it. I can never predict when that 5% will happen.

- Also on team "open turns". And team "fuck changing tubes on my deep rimmed wheels".

- I pee in the grass in T1 if I need to go. Best tip given to me by a former elite triathlete when I started the sport.

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Level II USAT Coach | Level 3 USAC Coach | NASM-CPT
Team Zoot | Tailwind Trailblazer
I can tell you why you're sick, I just can't write you an Rx

Peeing in the grass...as in you already have water dripping down your leg from the swim so do it now and no one will notice?

Kinda smart. Never thought of that.

I played soccer as a kid and in college. At time I peed on the field when there was an injury or during stretching. Just hid it and no one knew!

I had a neuroma in each foot and surgery was a godsend.

Confession time:
- I don't care if people pee in the pool. Half a million litres of chlorinated water will dilute the occasional wee that slips out.
- I am very good at snot rockets but can't spit with any finesse at all
- I get *really* cranky when guys I just met start mansplaining bikes and equipment to me
- This winter I rediscovered how much I love mountain-biking so I put my TT bike up for sale

When I finish a distance in the pool on my last stroke I stop my watch before I touch the wall 😅

- I use wrist HR a lot, because I'm too lazy to mess around with sports bras and HR straps for short/easy sessions.
- I had to cut my hair off because I didn't wash it anywhere near enough for someone who trains twice a day.
- I think long rides are boring as hell, and I only do them for the training benefit. I'd rather hammer up a hill a few times and call it a day.
- In theory fresh sweat shouldn't smell bad unless you leave it, but when I run I seem to bypass that and go straight to onion smell.
- I've been training for my first race for 3 years now, because of cancellations/financial limitations. I'm actually kind of scared to race now, because apparently my numbers are 'exciting' and I feel like my actual results won't live up to that.
- I got into triathlon just as I was too old for the u23 elite program in my region, and I'm secretly bitter about it.
- I've lied to my coach about my local pool being closed due to COVID restrictions to justify missing swim sets.

I am definitely pleased and intrigued by the ST women displaying amazingly UN-lady-like behavior

They are absolutely badass, and I admit to a little bit of a crush on each & every one of them

Keep up the good work, and don't take any shit from anyone

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

I hate my road bike. I keep trying to ride it outside and know I need it for the rare group ride, but I feel like a billowing sail and find nothing more comfortable than being in the TT bars on my B14.

I'm usually one of the first out of the water, but carry ZERO swim fitness. I was a decent swimmer in high school and 12 years later that is still paying dividends. When race week comes, I jump in the pool once or (rarely if it feels horrible) twice just to remember what water feels like. I've had a couple of summers where I swim consistantly but its never made me any faster in the water.

I was strongly anti bib-short. Now I feel stupid and all I wear is bib shorts if not racing in my trisuit.

I'm a bit overweight at 5'8" 170#, but every time I lose weight to get down to around 160, I get slower. I know there is in theory more potential, but I'm happy being at the competitive level I'm at.

I secretly resent my 13 month australian shepherd because she is incapable of being a running buddy. Leash biting is life to her.

I've upgraded my wife's bike without telling her because she says its a waste of money.

I've slowly adjusted her aero bars to be narrower because she is all comfort no aero. She got a fit and made them wider immediately. She doesn't seem to notice yet.

I told my wife that her Rudy Wingspan expired and got her a POC cerebral instead.

I'm discovering as I write this that I care far more about her IM Chatt this fall than any of my own races this year.

Jealous of the pool/swim success. It would be awesome to only train for 2 items for the race, rather than squeezing in 3 throughout the week.

I bought more than a few issues of Soldier Of Fortune in order to find and mail order the exact same Arctic Tiger Stripe camo pants [white pants with blue, light grey and dark grey stripes] that Joe Strummer wore at the show The Clash played with The Who at JFK

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin