He's right. Where I'm from, legit (lifelong, competitive) swimmers use the lap=length convention, whereas the only people I've ever heard the lap=down and back are converts and are usually not very good. There's a correlation, but not necessarily a causation.
But that's not really relevant, except that the convention in the sport is what we should default to when using the word in the context of the sport. In Bowling, a strike is knocking down all the pins. In Baseball, a strike is a swing and a miss, or failing to swing at a ball in the strike zone, or hitting the ball foul (except when this would result in a third strike, in which case it doesn't count against the batter).
I think it would be ridiculous to try to tell a bowler that a "strike" would be the equivalent of missing all the pins, or throwing a gutterball, and that's analogous to the issue here. Non-swimmers are trying to tell swimmers how to use a word that is ours, in this case. When the word is used in the context of swimming, I'm the one that assigns meaning to it, along with all of my legit swimmer friends. We choose to assign the meaning of lap=length, therefore that is the accepted convention for the sport by all who are legitimate swimmers.
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