I have met both of my biological parents.
I have zero attachment to them.
The bond I have with my own son (who is adopted) is like nothing else in this world.
I am not adopted, so I can't speak to that birth parent link when a person doesn't grow up with their birth parents. I know exactly
what you mean with respect to the relationship with you child. He's blessed to have you.
While I have no experience with adoption, I will say that when my daughter was born... I felt absolutely zero innate paternal instinct or bond towards her.
She is 19 months now, and our relationship is amazing and the love I have for her his beyond words. But man, those first 4-6 months, I won't lie... Those were emotionally very difficult for me as I slowly tripped and fumbled my way in to the role of parent.
Whenever I hear people say things like "as soon as I saw my child, I felt this instant connection" I just cannot relate at all to that feeling.
Needless to say that little bit of conversation doesn't always go over well at dinner parties as most people don't seem to understand where I'm coming from but, fuck it, it was the truth for me.
My daughter has been napping on me for an hour as I type this. It's hard to believe the bond we have grown since those early days.
Proud citizen of Long Chile.