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Post deleted by toolguy [ In reply to ]
Re: relatioship Q for the ladies [toolguy] [ In reply to ]
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Dude chill out, we're not here to shit on you, really. Many of us have been in comparable situations. You need to do some serious thinking about what you need from your marriage. Ask your wife if she can honestly give those things to you. If not, then you have your answer. The first hard part will be you coming up with what you need an effectively communicating that to her. Then the second hard part will be taking the action(s) you already know you are going to make.

You will need some time to heal and get over all this hate and hurt and neglect. Any relationship during this time will have a tough time lasting.


"How bad could it be?" - SimpleS
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Re: relatioship Q for the ladies [AndyPants] [ In reply to ]
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toolguy sounds like a well educated individual going through a rough time. Tough love and honesty works but I think it is obvious that it has gone a bit far at this point. I believe he will agree with many of the posts as time goes on but at this point I think he needs a little support and people are pushing too far. It is evident by him trying to delete the post.

People, especially people that are the "giving type" rather than the "taking type", need time to process and need nurturing along the way. If you really care, even though you don't know him, I think that is great. It is a wonderful trait when people sincerely care for others. And if you are one of those people, I believe you need to slow down. This will be a gradual and painful process for him (or anyone for that matter) and overloading him with advice is going to drive him nuts.

Yes, it is his fault for asking on an Internet forum. But he did take a step towards figuring things out. Perhaps not the way others would do it, but he did take a step.

He sounds like a good, humble, respectful person that is having a hard time.

I think it is time to stop with the advice (toolguy you could also just stop reading the thread. The thread could go on as soom of this advice could be useful for others). And people that care could send him a PM and see if correspondence occures.

"your horse is too high" - tigerchik
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