Don't do this sport if you don't enjoy it! This is a hobby not a profession for most of us here. Go to the pool/lake/ocean and just swim if that's what you like to do. Run trails or enter races if you like to run. Ride your bike outside, bury yourself on the trainer, or do some gravel racing if you want to bike. If you don't like any of it just do some moderate exercise everyday to stay healthy. There's plenty of other sports and activities you could pick up if swim/bike/run just isn't doing it for you anymore.

I did a full Ironman side by side with a friend once at ~20% below our normal effort. Well, on the bike we traded draft legal distance spots every 10 minutes or so. But swam and ran side by side. It was awesome. Never ran an easier race. Felt better after that one than after a solo hard pushed 70.3.

So find a buddy if you can!

Exactly this

There's no Rule that says that you have to suffer

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

A person can swim, bike, run, hike, stretch, do yoga, lift weights, play golf, hit tennis balls, go surf, go paddle, etc, enjoy a little self induced suffering now and then, and never race again. I call this person THE SILENT TRIATHLETE. You will enjoy your workouts while staying fit, and perhaps more fit, and maybe just as fast as when you are training to race.

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Emilio De Soto II
Maker of triathlon clothing, T1 Wetsuits, & Saddle Seat Pads and AXS since 1990
emilio@desotosport.com http://www.desotosport.com

I have never trained with a squad aside from swimming. The swimming squad is quite mellow aside from our coach who is too serious. You could do your cycling as getting out and seeing the world gravel rides rides in the country etc

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They constantly try to escape from the darkness outside and within
Dreaming of systems so perfect that no one will need to be good T.S. Eliot

True!

While doing these things, a person encounters new friends who laugh and run and bike and play and make it all very fun!

I don’t see a trade-off between getting faster and enjoying your training. Even pros say they have to enjoy the work (for the most part). Find a different squad with people who aren’t that stuck up. Maybe Mexicans? (J/k)

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"FTP is a bit 2015, don't you think?" - Gustav Iden

More than a few times, I've been talking to someone (usually about running) then I'd add that I also do cycling for MS, and used to swim fairly regularly

"So, you're a triathlete then?"
"I wouldn't say that," I'll answer, "I mean I was, and still might be. But I'd rather not confess to it. Being a Runner is bad enough"

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

Ease back into it and stay away from the IM crowd; the amount of ego/competitiveness there can be really off-putting sometimes. Do local races, target a finish time and see how close you can get to it.

I’ve had completely opposite experience with my local team and tri community on the whole, despite some who are highly competitive in races. It’s a team culture of supportiveness and fun that’s made it enjoyable to me, even though I train run and ride mostly alone (but group rides for the long rides). So the advice I have is to look for a different team! Also, truly consider if you really do like and enjoy the sport (or any of the 3)! You definitely don’t have to keep doing it and maybe there’s something else you’d enjoy more.

My former club was that way too.

I had my squad that trained together a lot but not everyone was like that and we often swam, rode and ran together in the same area (like a state park). Sometimes easy/hard, long/short. Many times we would meet at a restaurant afterwards and the people that went shorter got us a table which was a very valuable convenience.

I belong to a squad but do most of my training by myself. I like the social aspect of it but hate being subject to the schedule and rigor of others. I only train as much as it adds benefit to my life. I then set my expectations accordingly when it comes to race results. If training adds life stress then it's not worth it. I see tri as a hobby. If I don't enjoy it then it's not a hobby. That's why I only do full Ironmans about once every 3-4 years. If I do them more frequently then it is just a life stressor and I don't need that.

I actually find it interesting how many people are tri fans (and members of this forum) but don't race all that much, if at all. It's ok to be a fan and not a participant!

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http://dontletitdefeatyou.blogspot.com

I have trained with a handful of different groups. One group that I trained with for years was zero fun, pompous people, training through injuries and then bragging about it, snooty, etc. Then, I found a different group that has more people so there's more variety of athletes to associate with. Some folks in that group are just at the workouts for the social experience and beverages/food afterwards.

I love the term SILENT triathlete! I get tired of people who have to post every workout on social media and they seek that validation about their training.

KK

I just did my first one as fast as I can and after that it's game on!!! I try to beat previous years' time and sometimes I can beat it, sometimes I can't. To me, that's what make it fun. Yes, I suffer a lot during the race, but it's all good after the nice meal and sleep. It's very fulfilling to me and I do enjoy my routine workout and training. It keeps me in shape, strong.and fast.

I was where you are in 2003 when I noticed a huge shift towards being part of a "coached squad" instead of training with the local triathlon club. In the 90's it was all about going out and trashing each other during fun rides and runs and laughing about it afterwards at the pub.There was no pretentious bullshit that you see now and no paying to join groups for a Sunday long ride. I used to live in Cairns and we would race almost every weekend and while the standard of racing was high,the standard of partying was higher and the creative events we came up with were so much fun. Same thing in Penticton.

I used to spend almost every northern summer in Penticton training and racing everything from sprint distances to Ultraman and it wasn't unusual to race up and down the Okanagan Valley on multiple weekends in a row,sometimes riding 40k to the start of events. It was all about the adventure. One time I rode from Penticton to Kelowna to race the Across the Lake Swim. I rode the 60k up the valley,locked my bike at the finish line and then swam the 2k across the lake to the swim start to register,then did the actual swim race
before heading to the pub with everyone.

Then the coaches took over the sport and it all changed.The group rides ended as "Squad Sessions" became the norm and nobody would dare go against what "Coach" said. No more "have you ever been up that road,let's go and see what is up there?" because "coach says I have to do this session today". One of my favourite rides used to be with a bunch of slow old buggers in Penticton who were training for Ironman. It was during the summers of '93 and '94 and every second weekend I would ride around the IMC course with these four guys.We would ride 40k to the town of Oliver and have "first breakfast" at the Glassebo restaurant and I mean a real breakfast. Then we would head off to Osoyoos at the bottom of the climb to Richter Pass and have a coffee before riding Richter and the rollers to Keremeous where we would have "second breakfast" in a local cafe before heading to Yellow Lake and back down to Penticton. Those rides took about 8hrs and I have never laughed so much again during any training rides as I did with those four guys. I was a 10hr guy in Ironman in those days and the rest were just trying to finish under 17hrs but that didn't matter,until the coached squads changed the sport and everyone had precise sessions scheduled for them.

You can see it at Ironman races now. Back in the day we used to drink booze before and after races,at the carbo party and at the awards and the after parties were half the reason we entered the damned events and it didn't mater if you were a pro or not. I remember playing a prank on Tinley during the '94 Carbo party before taking him,Ray Browning and Astrid,the Power Bar girl to a nightclub two days before Ironman. I remember standing between PNF and Wendy "Wingnut Ingram while a drunk Paula was ranting about Huddle and the cheating boys in IMOZ (Forster).Every race around the world was an excuse to go and see a new country and have a fun time and then the coaches took over the sport. Do you see a theme in my little rant?

I have seen two triathlon clubs destroyed by the "Coached Squad" that started in two different towns and watched as local races started to suffer because the old tri club members became members of the coached squads and have seen those coaches schedule Ironman specific training weekends on the very same weekends as the local tri-club events,virtually shutting them down.Apparently Ironman athletes can't do sprint tri's while training for Ironman events,or so some would have you believe. Don't get me started on coaches who "order" their athlete not to do the Underpant Run because they need to rest for the race that weekend.

The sport has changed a lot over the years,some for the better,some for the worse but change is okay,it is the pretentious attitudes that are now commonplace that have driven me from group rides and swims.I do all my training alone and have done now for 20 years.

"Change is good; change killed the dinosaurs"

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

I've never trained with a squad but have done a few rides and runs with a buddy. But with anything, I recommend discovering your "why". You define success, no one else (especially in endurance sports!).

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80/20 Endurance Ambassador

Have a happy swim, a plesant ride, and a great run:):):) [speed does not factor in]

I think it comes down to mindset, and personality type.
For some people, this will be harder than for others.

For me, I do most of my training alone. I am not looking for external validation, just the knowledge that I can do what I put my mind to. As a... slower than average tri-tourist (I still don't think of myself as a an athlete), I know that I am not going for the win (in fact, IMWA is the only race where I can race to finish in daylight) - this brings a different mindset, IF you are willing to embrace it.
For me, I have has a few slow races (15+hr finishes) including concussion for one event. I had previously signed up to IMAus, and was unsure about even starting. One of my big drivers was knowing that if I was to finish, I would have completed every IM on the AusNZ calendar. So I managed to change my mindset.
I looked at this as a possible end to long course racing, that this could be the last full IM that I would do. So how to change what happens on the day?
Mindset. Step 1 - Keep a smile on my face, make sure I AM actually enjoying myself. This is more important than anything else. Placing/speed/what everyone else is worried about etc. these are not going to affect your race, focus on making sure you are enjoying your race. Because if you are not enjoying it, why bother?
(Step 2. Finish. Hint: I did :D)

With this mindset then changes how one approaches training.
Some need the rigor that comes with group training. But if you don't care about the actual time, and just want to have the best time on the day, it means that you can change how you think about training. You don't need to do 5am hill repeats in the rain, when you can go out at 8am and do a metric rolling hill loop instead. How you feel on a day to day basis should change how you train, don't feel like going for a long run? go for a swim, then have a brick run afterwards. change what you do, and (hopefully) remember why you started the sport in the first place. Training isn't the pain that gets you to the startline, The startline is the dessert for actually going out and enjoying yourself for week after week of training.

TLDR - ignore everyone else, put a smile on your face, and go for a run :D

You have no parkruns in Spain organise one. I have to say I really like the atmosphere of those and the one I do the fast guys volunteer a lot ie little egos. And no talk about gear.

What's wrong with talking about gear?? Gear is exciting and interesting.

Triathlon isnt about fun. It is about absolute suffering. You use it as a tool to punish yourself for who you are. Did you drink that extra beer at dinner? Did you look at that cute girls butt but you have a girlfriend? Did you say 3 slices of pieces but you went for a 4th? Did you pee in the pool? Then you must now cycle and run until you get so deep in the pain cave you have nothing left and turn into a robotic shell of a human Fun? Who has fun? You suffer and you suffer proper.

Don't forget the Shame

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

nothing wrong but the OP DOES NOT WANT IT , why force something on somebody who does not want it ...