Hmm. Be advised that my ability to sound like I know what I'm talking about is highly trained. But that doesn't mean I really do know what I'm talking about.

1. I found that Reports of swimmer deaths due to lightning strike fall apart under closer inspection. So I would go looking for the source material re. the Malibu Beach death. For example, IIRC, the most often cited source of "lightning killed someone in a US swimming pool" turned out to be a guy that a heart attack when lightning struck the ground near the pool. No indication of electrocution. For someone to be hit while swimming in the ocean he'd have to have been a concentration of a millennia of bad luck. For electricity to kill you, it has to go thru you. Electricity seeks a ground. If the ground is on the other side of you, lets say you're standing on the ground hanging on to a ground rod, then a bolt of lightning might find it's way to the ground rod thru you. That would be bad.

But if you're in the middle of the ocean, your immersed in a great big zone of ground potential. So there's no need to go thru you to get to ground. Ground is everywhere. In fact, because of galvanic skin response, you're actually kind of an insulator in a big zone of ground potential, just not a strong insulator. Sure, if lightning struck right next to you, the voltage would be briefly so high that it might go poorly for you. But having high voltage right next to you is not an immed death. Think about a bird sitting safely on a high voltage wire. It comes back to.....does the electricity have a reason to go thru you. The answer to that depends on the precise scenario, but if you're in the water, I'm thinking "no".

2. I used to carry my whole sheaf of papers in my swim bag. But that was a while ago. I couldn't tell you the exact date of the sources. Certainly after 2000 tho.

3. No. It's a mistake to attempt to apply logic to a largely emotional issue. I don't think that folks aren't likely to risk dicking around trying to divert lightning from a pool. Because we've become so litigious, we're hugely risk averse. Modern lightning protection measures are probably all building code and architectural "best practices" stuff based on 50yr old science. Personally, I think the best you're going to be able to do is to put together an information packet like I did in an attempt to show an adult just how low the level of risk really is. Help them take a look at their insurance policy too. They've probably not read it carefully, and few folks can accurately parse a sentence anyhow. See if you can't get the pool honcho to agree to something like "pool open unless lightning 2mi away".

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"If only he had used his genius for niceness, instead of Evil." M. Smart