Tom,
I am with you 100%. I feel like I am the luckiest man on Earth! My wife amd I did not even meet until we were 37 (each our 1st marraige). Now we have our third child on the way. This is truly a dream come true for me that I never thought would happen. Now, I certainly don't think the dream will ever stop, but I am sure that others have felt that way too.
Good thing she and I both have past experiences behind us, have matured, and are right for each other. I don't think relationships are 50/50...I think they are 90/10 with BOTH sides having a responsibility for the 90. You can't have and eye on the exit door, or wandering eyes, or rather bike than hold hands to make it work. I tell my friends that you have to "flip the switch" to there are no longer any options other than to do what is best for your spouse and family. You CHOOSE your attitude about it so that is the way it is and you have to enjoy it. We also discuss these issues daily so that we stay fined tuned in order to prevent having to take it in for a complete overhaul.
There was other talk about an alcoholic spouse, and that is terrible - the worst of the worst - and thank God they have moved on; but, that did not just happen over night. Either, they made a mistake by getting into that situation OR it progressed gradually. Could it, or the cause, have been prevented with constant fine tuning? I don't know. I can say I really don't buy the "we just grew apart," "we're just not compatable any more," etc.
You are right, our society is a bit of a mess. That is scary as a parent of young ones. I believe it is a results of declining values, decreased personal responsibility, lack of spirituality, and increasing fast paced lifestyles in which every one wants something new including new spouses. It becomes a pervasive and acceptable attitude in society that is tough to change and is very dangerous. I think all we can do is, just like an Ironman, keep putting one foot in front of the other, do what is right, what is good, and not give up.
Lastly, it may be just a fantasy, but once found it is fantastic! Be patient and uncompromising in the process....Good Luck and keep the faith!
David
* Ironman for Life! (Blog) * IM Everyday Hero Video * Daggett Shuler Law *
Disclaimer: I have personal and professional relationships with many athletes, vendors, and organizations in the triathlon world.
I am with you 100%. I feel like I am the luckiest man on Earth! My wife amd I did not even meet until we were 37 (each our 1st marraige). Now we have our third child on the way. This is truly a dream come true for me that I never thought would happen. Now, I certainly don't think the dream will ever stop, but I am sure that others have felt that way too.
Good thing she and I both have past experiences behind us, have matured, and are right for each other. I don't think relationships are 50/50...I think they are 90/10 with BOTH sides having a responsibility for the 90. You can't have and eye on the exit door, or wandering eyes, or rather bike than hold hands to make it work. I tell my friends that you have to "flip the switch" to there are no longer any options other than to do what is best for your spouse and family. You CHOOSE your attitude about it so that is the way it is and you have to enjoy it. We also discuss these issues daily so that we stay fined tuned in order to prevent having to take it in for a complete overhaul.
There was other talk about an alcoholic spouse, and that is terrible - the worst of the worst - and thank God they have moved on; but, that did not just happen over night. Either, they made a mistake by getting into that situation OR it progressed gradually. Could it, or the cause, have been prevented with constant fine tuning? I don't know. I can say I really don't buy the "we just grew apart," "we're just not compatable any more," etc.
You are right, our society is a bit of a mess. That is scary as a parent of young ones. I believe it is a results of declining values, decreased personal responsibility, lack of spirituality, and increasing fast paced lifestyles in which every one wants something new including new spouses. It becomes a pervasive and acceptable attitude in society that is tough to change and is very dangerous. I think all we can do is, just like an Ironman, keep putting one foot in front of the other, do what is right, what is good, and not give up.
Lastly, it may be just a fantasy, but once found it is fantastic! Be patient and uncompromising in the process....Good Luck and keep the faith!
David
* Ironman for Life! (Blog) * IM Everyday Hero Video * Daggett Shuler Law *
Disclaimer: I have personal and professional relationships with many athletes, vendors, and organizations in the triathlon world.