i would love to change it, but my local training group threatened bodily harm unless i address myself as whineyass in all public forums and personal communications!! i'm not sure how to remedy this one. i am definitely no speed demon. i could change mine to "slow whiney ass" or "short whiney ass" (due to my massive 5'5'', 140lb frame). feel free to offer suggestions (i have a feeling this could get out of hand if too many people read this--luckily i have no pride!)

whineyass (for now)

ok in honor of your friends you may keep your name. be warned if at any point you whining seems to threaten mine i will smite you heavly. i will tell you all about loosing my bicycle. i can go from thirty to three in 2.4 seconds. ;)

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

so I am not the smallest here? 5'7'' and 135lbs...

what would think of miniclydesdale for a new nick?

Nah, Francois...you'll always be more of a thoroughbred than a clydesdale!

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Quid quid latine dictum sit altum videtur
(That which is said in Latin sounds profound)

That's not small, but it is skinny! :)

I'm ~5'-2" (for some reason I've shrunk an inch in the last two years) and 135lbs.

There should be a specific division for short people at races - the "Mini-Me" division. It only makes sense because of our shorter stroke/stride-length.

that sounds fine to me--if i even begin to whine these days i will get shoved into oncoming traffic if we're running, heavily squirted with water on the bike, or just flat out pummeled. they don't do anything to me in the water because i come close enough to killing myself without any help when i enter the water. i like the idea of the mini-clydesdale--according to those online body mass index calculators, i'm overweight!! and i also second the idea of the mini-me category. too bad i can't think of a category i'd actually be competitive in!

whineyass

insert smart/funny/inspiring quote here

Shame be upon you both. I condemn you. You are condemned. There shall be no whining. With strength and endurance go forward into the valley, the Energy Lab, the helix at Wisconsin. Bring credit to the creed of triathloners, praise be upon them. Through your efforts you shall be cleansed of whining. Only through rigorous training can this whining be purged from your ATP fuel system and cast to the bowels of hell. I compel you to do ten long rides with no saddle of any kind and promptly repsond to all posts inquiring about athletic brassiers, praise be upon them. May your bike fit you well, praise be upon it.

excuse me trijihad911! i think you are assuming a little with that whiner rant. maybe if you knew jesus more instead of that who ever you worship... sorry sorry temper got me there, you see i got this rash. it really itches. i asked my mom what do about it and she said go see the doctor but i don't want to drive all the way down town.
american idol is coming on and just have to watch mr. personality after that. i went for a run this morning and my knees hurt. i used up all the ice in my freezer last night when my sister, my brother in law and thier boys came over for dinner. my wife burned the ham again. i tell her to keep an eye on it and all she does is yack yack yack. anyway i'm out of ice and would have to go to the store to get some. but the traffic is so bad in our nieghborhood. i mean who designed the streets around here the french? any way my knees hurt too bad to even walk across the parking lot at tom thumb. i won't go to albertsons any more because those people are so rude! yesterday i was getting some food for my dog. god training this thing is a nightmare! all it does is chew. sure it is only an eleven week old puppy but for god's sake can't it get a grip? anyway i was buying dog food and the punk kid who took it out to the car for me was like fronting major attitude. was it so far out his way to carry the 5 lbs. bag for me? i mean god i really messed up my shoulder on monday helping perfecto change the blade on greg's double deck mower. why did i have to change the blade? why couldn't hector have done it? greg always makes me fix the equipment. he says he only trusts me because i'm the only white guy on his regular cure. what a nazi! last time i get on his crew. you know day labor ain't so bad as long as you smile a lot and get friendly with the guys. you know let them make fun of you spanish and pull your wieght. god is hard to pull your wieght with these guys. man they just don't stop. hector goes to college at night and works the crews during the day. if he ain't making me look bad by out producing me on the turf he always wants to talk about the physics he is studying. i mean i love a good talk about quantum membranes more than the next guy, i am so tired of string theory. i mean come on the membrane idea is much more complete. anyway we had the mower up on jack stands and the blade is like frozen on the spindle and we are soaking it with zep 40 and banging the hell out of it with hammers. well get the idea to skip the hammers and use this iron rod we foud in the scrap heap behind the wharehouse we where working and tried to just bang the hell out of it with that. it woked knocked it right off but raming that much iron at such a wierd angle really did a number on my shoulder. so back to the orginal point, trijihad911, i don't see where you get off saying we are a bunch of whiners. your just up tight like that tom d guy. what a work that guy is. 'oh look at me i missed a chance to play in the wind tunnel' cry me a river mr d. yesterday at work the day shift didn't make one of the beds so i had to do it! like i don't have a hard enough time getting that rembrant program reading 01 or ekg. who wrote that program? no one who ever studied sleep i can tell you that...

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

I condemn you. You are condemned. I cast stones and shoes upon you. I worship only Slowtwitch, praise be upon it, and all the fervent followers who make the pilgrimage to this hallowed forum, praise be upon it (and them too). Do not do evil unto the followers of Slowtwitch, lest you suffer the rath of a thousand barking hounds. Hounds chasing your wheels, hounds in your spokes. Hounds from Dan Empfield's (praise be upon him)house, the sacred land of Xantusia and its desert paradise.

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Tom Demerly
The Tri Shop.com

You think you've got problems I can't even figure out to spell this darn word. this goofy spell check thing only tells me that I am whining wrong and it complains i've got really really really; bad grammer. To top this all off all anybody is doing in really bad context is whining about things that they whine about. So why don't you whine about something important like why in the world the Midwest is flat but the rest of the world isn't. or is it? because i've haven't left the midwest in a really long time because i don't have any money. Speaking of no money because i don't have any money I can't wine and dine so i guess i'm stuck just being able to whine, or is it wine. I don't know I'm just so confused, but if you were any kind of poser you wouldn't be whineing about things that matter, or would you, I don't know the world is just so confusing. Is it because the world is not flat, or did I already say that? See I can't even make sense of myself, maybe everyone should just feel sorry for me. Especially good looking girls.

This entire forum, perhaps even the entire triathlon community is now dumber for having read this thread.

oh look is so much smarter than i. you jay are a...ow!
my new puppy is nipping at my foot. i love this dog and all. it's tons of fun and cute. but why does it keep chewing and chewing? i mean i have all these dog toys and it just loves socks. why do so many sock makers leave such a large seam bunched on the toe box area? i mean defeet soesn't have it. why can't the other sock companies do it. it's just right fair. sometimes socks go on sale at a great price but have that seam. so i don't buy them and miss a great buy...

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

tom you forgot to post as trijihad911. you just started talking like trijihad911. the joke was that trijihad911 was your alter ego. see now that you have said your condeming rant in your tom post you have ruined the joke of trijihad911. it's like my bosses at work. they make us use the piece of trash rembrant software but want us to take notes and write reports in ALICE protocol. yo can't do it. ALICE is the best sleep study program ever and it is easier to read and understand the data from it's protocol. my bosses on the other hand won't pay the extra c-note per terminal for ALICE. so i have to try and change protocol. i can't do it. my number aren't coming from ALICE. what am i supposed to be somekind of computer...

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

eeh gad. I'm a moron. But you already knew that...

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Tom Demerly
The Tri Shop.com

your still my hero. well not as much as dan. well maybe you are more of my hero than dan. i must think about this.

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

You are no longer condemned. I welcome you into the palace of Slowtwitch, sit at the arm of Dan and Gerard and Frank, praise be upon them, and eat of the fruits of the desert palace, Xantusia. Bask in their tents. Sample the 1,000 virgins guarteed you in this paradise. Praise be upon you.