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Taking the family to an IM...
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I've got my first IM coming up in a few short weeks. I've trained hard and got a fairly good handle on swim/bike/run now and i'm reasonably confident of getting around it. The part that worries me the most now is what to do with the family on race day.

I'm middle-aged with a wife and 3 school-aged kids. In a couple of years i've gone from being a typically dull & overweight office worker to being quite a sportyhead so my family has had to get used to "Where's dad?" "He's out for a run/on the trainer/swimming/eating the entire contents of the food cupboard*" *Delete as applicable.

So far I've done a handful of running races, Olys & 70.3s and i've learned that the family's attention span is limited to (very) short events. Typically I would cross the finish line beaming, and tell them my awesome time to which they'd reply "Great, you've been ages, can we go home now!?". One of my kids even nicked my water off me at the finish of my first 70.3. So I don't tend to take them with me anymore.

So.. the Ironman. This is the culmination of months and months of training, a massive life goal and all that, and i need to take them with me if only to prove to them that it actually happened, and to involve them in the spectacle and scale of the whole undertaking and to provide closure at the end of a year of putting up with dad's new all-consuming hobby. There is a risk that if i just go off by myself and come back in a couple of days looking tired and broken then it will diminish the whole thing for me in relation to the family and it'll be a case of "Hi family, I'm an Ironman!" "Great, now can you mow the frickin' lawn". But on the other hand taking them with me and making them stand around for 12 hours is going to test their love somewhat.

Unfortunately the IM in question is September in Wales, so it might well be raining, so sending them off to the beach is not necessarily going to be an option..

What do you all usually do with your families at Ironman? Just point them at the park and ride and let them get on with it, or manage them like a family day out and add a ton of stress to an already ton of stress situation...?
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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Find some fun activities for them to do during the race, near the finish line. Tell your wife what time range to be at the finish. Then, hopefully, they all get to see you finish, and everyone had a good day.
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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One of the reasons that I picked IMLOU this year is that my husband and parents can hang out in bars and wait for me. Of course, that probably doesn't work as well with kids. My husband typically finds things to do when I am racing such as going to nature preserves or even napping in the hotel. He drops me off at the start and shows up at the end. Sometimes I see him in between, but not always.
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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We always have a family vote b/f on where to go for an IM and I don't get a vote. That way they are someplace they chose and want to be. They usually love watching the start, and coming out of the water isn't THAT long. Then, they go do something fun for 5 hours. They usually check out T2, and then go have fun for 4 hours again. My finish times are *usually* quite predictable and they enjoy that. One of my mantras is to always feel good enough to go to dinner with them and/or be fun to be around. What ever you do don't complain about your race (we all want to be faster!).

David
* Ironman for Life! (Blog) * IM Everyday Hero Video * Daggett Shuler Law *
Disclaimer: I have personal and professional relationships with many athletes, vendors, and organizations in the triathlon world.
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [happyscientist] [ In reply to ]
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happyscientist wrote:
One of the reasons that I picked IMLOU this year is that my husband and parents can hang out in bars and wait for me. Of course, that probably doesn't work as well with kids. My husband typically finds things to do when I am racing such as going to nature preserves or even napping in the hotel. He drops me off at the start and shows up at the end. Sometimes I see him in between, but not always.

^This is my/our outlook. I'm driving up on Thursday. My wife flies in on Saturday. She can hang out with friends' S.O.s and watch as much or as little as she wants to. She's been to some of my HIMs.....but not all of them. I actually don't think triathlon is much of a spectator sport.......especially long course.
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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Remember: This is a race for you, but it's a vacation for them. Look up area attractions that will keep them busy. My kids really like watching the racers, but that only lasts for about an hour or two. That is a lot of unclaimed hours in the day.

Look up movie theaters, museums, amusement parks, special events, etc. That way they have OPTIONS that they don't have to feel responsible for. Make it so that their entire weekend doesn't "need" to be all about you, but it can be if they want. If your SO realizes "We have 3 and a half hours and the kids are burned out...now what?", they've got a nice menu to choose from.

Make sure the SO can make the kids feel like the weekend is about them as well. That way they want to continue going on "these cool race trips".
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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I'm not accusing you of anything, but it sounds like you're really hyped for this (which is great), but the rest of the family doesn't care that much (which is neither great nor bad - it's just personal preference). Have you asked your family (or at least your wife) if they want to go? If they don't want to (and again, it sounds like they don't), then why not let them monitor you online? Except for a few seconds during the race you won't know any different, and they can spend the day as they wish.
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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If they don't want to go don't take them.

They constantly try to escape from the darkness outside and within
Dreaming of systems so perfect that no one will need to be good T.S. Eliot

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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [len] [ In reply to ]
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len wrote:
If they don't want to go don't take them.

x2.

Pink? Maybe. Maybe not. You decide.
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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Try perusing triwivesclub.com. They may not have anything IM Wales specific, but they have a lot of ideas if you root around in their web site. One thing that I remember seeing is staying at a hotel on or near the course. This gives them a convenient headquarters and resting place. Scout out activities that are in walking distance and have a plan. They can track your progress on the IM app. You might want to prepare some expectations based on various pacings, so they might have a better sense when/where to look for you once they see your progress on the app. From your perspective, the day needs to be all about you. If your family wants to support you, that will be a big plus. If they hate being there, it won't be good for them or for you. If you go into it with a plan and it looks like fun for them -- its win win. You really will only have a few chances all day to see them, so that means for them they can have the rest of the day on their own.

P.S. Do not get worried if they do not show up at an expected point in your race. They are dealing with a lot of logistics and may have just mistimed getting there. There is very little likelihood that they need your help and worrying about them will neither help them nor help your race.
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [hugoagogo] [ In reply to ]
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Is there a trihusbandsclub.com?? I get it...triathlon is male dominated, but geeze, I could never get my bf to read a website called triwivesclub, even if it does provide good info.
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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My family came with me when I did IM Wales in 2014, the kids were aged 15 and 18.
There's plenty to do around Pembokeshire in the days leading up to race day.

On race day itself I'd encourage the family to get up early and watch the mass start from the cliff top, its a fantastic vantage point and a great sight to see.
Then pick a spot in the town centre and they can watch everyone running through town carrying their wetsuits to T1.
The bike is a bit boring for spectators unless they can get down to Saundersfoot where there is a steep climb which is full on TdF mode - fantastic!
The run is 4 loops and winds itself up and down through the town centre so get your family to take up a position outside a decent café, or one of the numerous pubs, and let them watch the suffering.

Its the best atmosphere I've ever encountered at a race, the whole town really goes for it...enjoy
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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My family comes with me to my races. They make it very stressful for me, 3 kids, but my wife wants to be there, kids don't. I usually end up at race morning 10 minutes before transtion closes. Last year we left the 15 and 5 y/o with Grandma back home and my wife brought the little one to race. Made it a lot less stressful and she loved walking all day and tracking me, the crowds, the cheers,....She really enjoys the atmosphere.

http://www.sfuelsgolonger.com
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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RCCo wrote:
I've got my first IM coming up in a few short weeks. I've trained hard and got a fairly good handle on swim/bike/run now and i'm reasonably confident of getting around it. The part that worries me the most now is what to do with the family on race day.

I'm middle-aged with a wife and 3 school-aged kids. In a couple of years i've gone from being a typically dull & overweight office worker to being quite a sportyhead so my family has had to get used to "Where's dad?" "He's out for a run/on the trainer/swimming/eating the entire contents of the food cupboard*" *Delete as applicable.

So far I've done a handful of running races, Olys & 70.3s and i've learned that the family's attention span is limited to (very) short events. Typically I would cross the finish line beaming, and tell them my awesome time to which they'd reply "Great, you've been ages, can we go home now!?". One of my kids even nicked my water off me at the finish of my first 70.3. So I don't tend to take them with me anymore.

So.. the Ironman. This is the culmination of months and months of training, a massive life goal and all that, and i need to take them with me if only to prove to them that it actually happened, and to involve them in the spectacle and scale of the whole undertaking and to provide closure at the end of a year of putting up with dad's new all-consuming hobby. There is a risk that if i just go off by myself and come back in a couple of days looking tired and broken then it will diminish the whole thing for me in relation to the family and it'll be a case of "Hi family, I'm an Ironman!" "Great, now can you mow the frickin' lawn". But on the other hand taking them with me and making them stand around for 12 hours is going to test their love somewhat.

Unfortunately the IM in question is September in Wales, so it might well be raining, so sending them off to the beach is not necessarily going to be an option..

What do you all usually do with your families at Ironman? Just point them at the park and ride and let them get on with it, or manage them like a family day out and add a ton of stress to an already ton of stress situation...?

This is off the wall, and could get a bit pricey, but my wife did this for me and it was awesome. Last year, she did IMLou as her 1st IM. She hid about 8-10 little gifts for me to be opened at certain times throughout the day. They were a combination of funny/thoughtful. I posted them on facebook as I was opening them and by the end of the day, I had a huge following of people waiting to see what was next. For instance, at 8am, I opened a package that had a new pair of boxer briefs that had a little note that said "Here's a new pair of boxers, since you probably just crapped your pants watching me make that swim my bit*ch". A 4PM, it was a flask, that looked like a banana, etc etc. Anyhow, it was pretty cool, pretty fun and also very thoughtful. I think it was a good way for her to have fun but also show appreciation to me for putting up with the rigors of IM training. I'm racing IM Chattanooga this year and plan to do something similar. If my kids were going (they're not), I'd probably do something similar for them too, as they've seen me on the bike trainer late at night for 4 hours many times. I try very hard not to interrupt family time, but sometimes you have to get very creative and sometimes the entire family has to sacrifice a bit.

One thing about this though, it took alot of effort on her part to put it altogether, so it may be more work than you want to do. It also doesn't fill all the time, but it may help.
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [dprocket] [ In reply to ]
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The only races my kids will come to are Ironman. Usually because we are away and it's more of a vacation for them. They are usually pretty psyched at the swim start and finish, then usually go out to breakfast with my wife, maybe back to the hotel for a nap. Get up, have lunch, watch me come in on the bike. They will usually try to catch me on the run once or twice then usually go for some appetizers at a restaurant with my wife and parents. Or they go get ice cream. Or if the hotel has a pool, they will go back to the pool sometime during the day. Even as they get older 13 & 15 now, it's a long day. As long as they are there at the start and finish I'd rather have them go have fun for the day. Who wants to watch a bunch of people swim bike and run for 12-13 hrs.
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [mattr] [ In reply to ]
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Thanks everyone. Some excellent ideas and perspectives here. I think at least I will discuss the various options with them, from leaving some or all of them at home and going solo to inspiring them with the spectacle of the event and giving them ideas to fill up their day. At the very least it has to be more interesting than sitting around at home like any other weekend... I might let my wife read this thread even...
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Re: Taking the family to an IM... [RCCo] [ In reply to ]
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I've done 6 IM's and one that I DNS'd but went to the race anyway because we had a vacation planned around it plus my brother and sister were doing it as their first IM's.

IMFL - Family did not go. School.
IMTX - We live outside Houston so that was a no-brainer they would come. It was 90+ degrees and my then six year old son was miserable so they left soon after I crossed the finish line.
IMAZ - Family came the day after the race and we spent Thanksgiving week at Grand Canyon and Las Vegas.
IMC-Whistler - First year of race and was held at end of August. School started the next day so no family.
IMFL - Same as first time with IMFL. Interferes with school.
IMC-Whistler - Family came and had a blast at Whistler.
IMMT - Family came and had a blast in MT and Montreal.

Spectating an IM is an incredibly boring affair. I would only bring my family if there were plenty of things for them to do and it does not interfere with more important things like school. Whistler and Tremblant were the only two venues that I've done that I'd think to bring them to.

Favorite Gear: Dimond | Cadex | Desoto Sport | Hoka One One
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