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This is sort of a difficult thread to post, but here goes:
Ever since I have begun to train seriously for IM (14-16 hrs a week during base building) I (and my wife)have noticed a big decrease in my sexual drive. I am only 29 yrs old. It is not my wife, she is beautiful in every way. And, when we do engage, I perform fine, that is not the problem. It's just the fact that I don't have the desire that I used to have that bugs the heck out of me. Before December (when I started amping up my hours of training), my desire was there, but ever since the training picked up, I have lost it.
I am sleeping enough. I am NOT always tired. I do incorporate recovery weeks into my training. I am not over trained. I have plenty of energy.
Am I missing some key nutreints in my diet?
Thanks for you help.
Carl
LOL! I have the same problem. Here's my theory: The average male supposedly thinks about sex about 10 times an hour or so. But now that I'm training for an IM, I think about IM about 10 times an hour, instead of sex.
The IM is not like a half, only longer. Its much more than that. I find myself somewhat intimidated. I think about my training schedule, my diet, my equipment, I study about training theories, I train, I surf around to tri web forums like slowtwitch.com, etc. So now when my brain wanders off into manfog, it gravitates to thoughts of IM instead of sex.
I've heard it said that "a man's sex drive is like a microwave, but a woman's is like a crock pot." I think that's a bunch of bunk. I think the man's sex drive is a like a crock pot, too, but since we're thinking about sex all of the time, the crock put is always hot. Now that I think about IM all of the time, the crock pot has cooled off...
That's my theory, and I'm sticking to it.
Carl,
For what IM are you training that has you training 14 to 16 hours a week in february? If you think you are having problems now, can you imagine what it will be like by the time your race gets here? I think you need to rethink your training. Sex is a lot more fun than riding a bicycle. Your wife is a lot more important than your masters swimming team. You have to make this sport fit into your life, not the other way around!
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''Sweeney - you can both crush your AG *and* cruise in dead last!! đŸ˜‚ '' Murphy's Law
Hmmm, well, one thing: After a few hard days on the computrainer and/or riding outside there is some compromise of performance on my part. A few days off the bike and its back. When I'm training pretty hard sometimes my sex drive drops off a tad, and it may be because other things are on my mind. There does seem to be this point at which the training elevates my interest or "attentiveness" to sexual stimulous. During IM preparation sometimes I go beyond that point and I'm just thinking "Man, I need to rest- I'm baked..." Having said that I seem to be more susceptible than many men and in different ways to sexual stimulus. If I'm laying in bed with the FCP (French Canadian Princess) and her hair brushes over my face- boom! I'm there. If I get a glimpse of her tummy under her shirt: Bang! Time for a break. I would have to be pretty "overtrained" (or under-rested)for that stimulus to not exert an effect. My perfromance may be compromised to some degree, but the interest is there.
Tom Demerly
The Tri Shop.com
Is that because its the "new girl"? Sex is always better with someone you haven't had sex with more than 30 times!
Hey Carl - Is it you, my Boca partner? If it is, since it appears you are sandbagging the hell out of me with all your training (14-16 hours per week, ouch), then my intent is to circulate your post around the Firm, staff included! You probably signed up for IMF without telling me, just to show up, intimidated me and smoke me. Well, I'm on to you. If you show up to Greater Clermont, my intent will be to put on you a good hometurf whoop-ass. Buzz me if you need a place to crash.
And as for this sensitive topic of your's, is your wife seeking a child and you're just not ready? I seemed to have lost all drive after my wife popped on me the desire to have one more . . . and I thought we were done!
PS. How are you maintaining the billable hours with all that training time? I have fallen apart with my trial schedule.
Major props (first time I have ever used that word) for bringing up this subject. I've been thinking about the same thing as my sex drive has tailed off since training also. Something about getting up at 5 am to work out, then working a 12 hour day takes it all out of me.
I think it's also a bit of when it's a new girl its exciting but after a while it's like who wants chicken every night.
In the case of my previous girlfriend from a few months ago (the catastrophic breakup some Slowtwitchers read my posts about): She made a lot of heavy promises and commitments to me and was not able or willing to honor those. It is hard to be sexual with a person you have a looming sense is going to let you down in a big way. The girl I started dating after that relationship has been kind, open and honest. She hasn't made promises she can't/isn't willing to keep. We enjoy our time together and it is pretty "light and airy" right now. After we were seeing each other for a few weeks it wound up in the bedroom- even after some pretty heavy drama (Jerry Springer style) that unfolded one night between her, my "mean" ex and me. Anyway- it s easier to be interested in physical intimacy with someone who you don't think is getting ready to screw you over. That is why I am excited about the FCP (the fact that she's a total hottie helps too). But even with her, if I have done a hard Computrainer ride and am wasted I'm good with giving her a foot rub and hitting the hay as opposed to knocking boots. Sometimes a lot of training just takes the "edge" off the sex drive. That's probably pretty normal I think.
Tom Demerly
The Tri Shop.com
That must have been one interesting encounter with the three of you. The ex never cares what you do untill you move on. Good for you though Tom, everyone deserves happiness. Not dealing with ex's that are impossible--the best revenge is your own happiness!!
Total Jihad in my living room.
Tom Demerly
The Tri Shop.com
Did you get it on video? Women's boxing is very big right now!!
it's not rest or vitimins you need it's FIT. I can help you with that is $350 to much??????