X2 what Ursus said. IT'S OK TO ASK FOR HELP! Guys generally suck at talking about feelings but there has to be another way before you make a decision that is so final and so devastating for family. RIP Dave.
UrsusMaximus wrote:
I'll second a lot of the people on here saying that you shouldn't assume that just because someone is outwardly happy they are not inwardly struggling with depression. Depression can be very hard to reason with. It's something I've struggled with myself and even when I was at my lowest points I always "knew" my life was good, but how I FELT was very different. That is part of the hopelessness that comes with depression - you can look around and know you have everything you always wanted in life but feel that you are condemned to feel awful and worthless no matter what you have or how much others love you. Outwardly I come across as a very energetic and happy-go-lucky person; most people I know are pretty shocked when they find out I've struggled with depression and anxiety.
It could have been CTE or just plain old, garden-variety depression that came about through a combination of genetic and environmental factors that we still don't fully understand.
I'll get on my soapbox for a minute and say that I think as men we need to learn to get away from this tough-guy notion that mental health problems are only OK if you acquired them doing something "manly." There seems to be this prevalent assumption that athletes and people in other traditionally masculine professions (soldiers, etc) only commit suicide as the result of some sort of severe trauma, be that physical or psychological. They are just human and vulnerable as everybody else, and many, many of them struggle with the same issues as us mere mortals - there are as many explanations for it as there are people. It often has little to do with their profession.
As men we should all remember that it doesn't have to be this way - it's OK to ask for help. It doesn't matter whether you need help because you hit your head a few too many times, because you saw a little too much in Iraq, because you had abusive parents growing up, or because you just got unlucky in the genetic lottery.
RIP Dave.