Here is the situation. She emailed me just now saying (among other things) the following: "I'm thinking of taking the girls Sat. afternoon for dress shopping. It will all depend on work schedule." (Now as a reminder this dress shopping experience is a result of the gift certificate she gave my 4 year old and 2 year old for Christmas "dress shopping with her"). I guess in her passive agressive way she is asking me if she can. I would like to be asked, directly. Asking in this way, makes it seem as if, again, I'm the bad guy if I say no. It irritates me that she assumes she can have them whenever she wants. I replied to her email and didn't address this statement she made as she had also asked other things I could respond to. So, just a few minutes ago, I received this: "If I don't work, and the weather permits, can I still take the girls to shop?" - "CAN I STILL" how do I even respond to this. Taking my girls is so beside the point. I'm so beyond her little ways of manipulation. My husbands ENTIRE family works like this. Rather than being direct, everything is always so backwards, hush-hush, don't tell the entire story, etc., etc., and I need to gain some boundaries so that they realize we will not engage in that type of craziness.
This may seem petty to some, and in a way I guess it is, but when you are dealing with this kind of garbage day-in-and-day-out it gets to be a bit much. So my options:
1. Do nothing and just answer her question. "Yes/No you can take the girls"
2. Answer her question & also tell her it would be nice to be asked (the wording in doing this option has me tripped up; I would want to be direct but very respectful.)
3. Ignore the email all together. Which solves nothing.
What the heck do I do?
Life is Short...Run Long