No.

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Dimond Bikes Superfan

yeah, could be Karen.

what would Dory do?

"Just keep swimming"

I dunno, I’m going to put myself in the moms shoes because I have a child who argues about the slightest physical activity even though he totally needs it. My son is a latecomer to bikes, he finally ditched training wheels in March (he’s 9). He was initially really jazzed about it and he was a bit too big for a 20” bike so he got to pick a 24” bike. He wanted a road bike like mine so I was able to get a good deal on one. He was so happy at first but before long he was refusing to go out and ride and it didn’t matter if it was on a bike path or around our quiet neighborhood. Now he won’t go unless I make him. If he were into any other type of exercise I wouldn’t care but he really doesn’t get out and run around with other kids. Every time we go out there’s a complaint about how long we’re going and he’s just trying to get the bare minimum (we have his Garmin reward him after 60mins of activity). So while I get not trying to make kids do stuff, I can sympathize if the mom is using swimming as one of the few physical outlets for the kids. Wish my son would want to ride more, I think he’s quite good for a novice (we do 11 mph) and cycling would be good for his adhd, but it’s tough to balance the making kids exercise for their own good if they don’t naturally like stuff

Not your responsibility to step in. Move along

Is she hot? is she single? Karen could just need a good "swim lesson" herself and you could be that guy haha

I wouldn't get involved from a parenting standpoint - nobody appreciates unsolicited parenting advice. I would, however, consider saying something if the kid is simply having a tantrum and not swimming but taking up a lane that someone else could be using. I find that inconsiderate when lanes are in demand.

Yes, please do and report back on how it went.

If you must complain, notify management and let them decide if anything needs to be done (probably nothing). If you need peace and quit to have your 'Zen' moment, buy your own pool or wear ear plugs.

No. Leave the woman alone.

How well can he swim? Compliment his ability, and bet him $5 that you can beat him in a 1 lap race. Let him lead, but make sure he has to work his ass off. Make it close, but make sure he wins. I bet you would change a life.

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Athlinks / Strava

First issue: You decided to have your 'zen' place at a public pool. No one has any obligation to work around you in order to keep you in your 'zen' state.

Second issue: Good for that mom. I applaud her for having the energy and determination to take the hard route, waking the kids up early and encouraging physical activity, instead of letting her children veg out in front of a computer or television screen.

Too easy these days to take the easy route with raising your children. It's a struggle every day, but a worthy one.

Don't be that guy. Keep your mouth shut. If you can't do that, at least offer a helping hand to the mom (free swim lessons, motivation for the kids, etc.).

Having been a swimmer for 55 years, as well as a coach, lifeguard, and USA Swim official at one time or another, as well as a USAT&F official and coach...

There have been parents like that since kids sports were invented and there is only one way to handle them - Shut them down as a person of authority - which you can't do because you have no standing.

When I coached track and cross country I told the parents they were to be quite and stay off the track, or course. If they started yelling I pulled them aside and explained I was the coach/official and they needed to let me do my job. That almost always worked, and when it didn't I found that peer pressure (other parents) could solve the problem.

When I coached a swim club the parents were not allowed on the deck, no exceptions. If you didn't like it take your kid to someone else. As a USA Swim official I have asked the head official to ask parents to leave or knock it off. I have stopped swim competitions for people like that until they got it together.

In your case you can do none of that and you have no recourse. You have to let it go. When it happens at my pool, and fortunately it doesn't happen often, I just tune it out. Sometimes I will stop and watch to see what is really going on, but that is just morbid curiosity. In the end I ignore it and do my workout.

Parents are one of the big reasons I "used to be" an official and coach, and why my plans to be a high school Mathematics teacher after I retired from the military didn't work out. Parents are always a problem in one way or another, and I raised 2 kids.

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"...the street finds its own uses for things"

Our kids dragged us to sports practices. I spent more time trying to talk my daughters out of swim practice than pushing them. "The 5:30 AM practice is not mandatory, would it hurt you to skip?". But no. I was the one whining and crying. It was so nice when they got their driver's licenses.

My son played several sports and was a D1 All-American in track and I never once had to drag him to practice. He took 7th and 8th grade off of organized sports because I couldn't stand sitting in a gym on nice days. We did spend the weekends hiking and spent many hours playing in the yard from the time he was teeny tiny.

My oldest daughter never had any interest in sports and we probably should have pushed her. She was never that physically active.

As others said, probably wouldn't work to say anything to mom. Unless you build a relationship first.

Seems like the best advice.

You want a 9 year old to ride a bike for 60 minutes? Re Garmin rewards? That’s a bit much for a 9 year old isn’t it? No wonder he argues about exercise .

As for the original post. Complain to management if anyone.

your commentary makes a ton of sense for an adult who already sent their kid to a coached activity

that said, sounds like the parent here is coaching the kid - so in this case, the parent is trying trying to play that role - let them be, its great the kids have a parent who cares.

stay out of it pal - parent is just coaching their kids. Not your place.

also hate the term "helicopter parent" to a parent who is just trying - what if they can't afford the swim team and this is the best the kid will ever get? Better than nothing right? Don't make so many assumptions.

Personally I don't think it's a lot, especially given his adhd, he has a lot of unused energy, and it's chill riding around our neighborhood, not like we're "training". He doesn't have any other physical activity outlets, not in school so no P.E., he's not really active with other kids. CDC recommends 60 mins of moderate to vigorous physical activity per day. So no, I don't think it's a lot. And like I said, I'd gladly let him do any other activity of his choosing, but he's not into anything. I don't want to be a sports parent, but I also think too many parents let their kids get away with way too little physical activity, and frankly that's how we're getting adults who are unmotivated to exercise (I should know, I spent way too many years being overweight). I think it's easy to make armchair parenting judgments, and certainly no parent is perfect, we're all trying to do the best we can for kids.

For 30 solid minutes she was tearing into the kid. For the same period of time the kid was fighting back tears. This is a repeat from a couple days earlier.. Neither my high school football coaches nor my upper classmen at my military college were this incessant with tearing people down. And for the record, my football team got ranked as high as 13th in the nation, so we were not a bunch of softies.
What she was doing is the definition of insanity- doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results.

Seriously you will just make things worse for the kid.

My mom was like that when I was under 12, total tyrant and abusive to the point of horror for other parents.

If any mentioned she should soften up, she would play nice to that person but take out the anger 2x on me afterwards.

The kid will suffer 2x for your virtue.

This made me sad....... I bet your mom was always "the helpless victim" too, when it was convenient. Yet berated her children till they froze still and couldn't breath.

When my brother was 9 (and I was 11) we rode our bikes from San Francisco to Los Angeles. I think a 9 year old can handle an hour...

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"I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 10, and I don't know why!"