Post up funny or interesting things you have "overheard", heard slip ups, or things that could not be unheard (or unseen).
First, wife and I were at dinner years ago on a date night at a local restaurant. Nice place. Kind of early to beat the rush and our oldest was really young at that point. The only other people there are a table of 8 or so seated at a big round table about 15 feet away. This mix of men and women apparently were local developers, and politicians, gaming on their schemes over dinner. You'd think the morons would at least talk in a way a little more conscientious of people being able to hear. I think this is where I lost faith in most any government at all hearing a bunch of local reps basically laughing it up about selling out some constituents angry about a rezoning in their area for another 50th grocery store within a mile of each other. Pretty much quote was "ah, don't care about those bozos, we'll get you whatever you need for your project". Burn, burn long and hot.
Second one, I'm in the shitter somewhere years back. Probably the airport. It's quiet. Guy goes up to the urinal while talking on the phone. I'm blasting some nice loud farts, and maybe even tossed in a childish armpit fart or two just to see what they'd do. Nothing, kept on talking even while they pissed. Then, mid piss, dude drops the phone into the urinal. Then a cuss storm that would make someone with tourettes blush.
Third one, just the other day I'm walking through the Easter candy section of Target and hear a woman in the most ice cold voice asking for stuff back over the phone "and that was a wedding present, I'm really going to have to have that back, like now". Whew, and the resting bitch face, yowza.
Next, file this one under "we're all racist to a degree".......I couldn't hear what kicked off he exchange, but a black guy had finished ordering at a McD and overhears something he doesn't like from the latino guys who rang up his order.......and responds with a tongue lashing en espanol muy lindo. The two guys look horrified.
Next, watched a 12 or 13 year old get clotheslined leaving a Target one day at full sprint and cuffed. Like, Terry Tate office linebacker style. The workers told me after I saw it that they had the kid on video at least 3 or 4 times coming into the store and loading a cart with the most expensive things he could find that weren't locked down. Dysons, electronics section, etc..... Then he'd literally just sprint out the front and into the woods or something nearby and go sell the stuff. How his parents didn't know, you'd have to be a moron. Oh Timmy, where'd the money for that $3000 in computer gear come from? Mowing lawns, right.
Last one I've got for now. Not sure what it was, I'm guessing a breakup/divorce/cheating phone call. I'm one car ahead stuck at a series of long stop lights of a woman talking on her phone. I notice that there is an increase in hand and arm gesticulations and eventually some body convulsions. This is getting good. About a minute and a half in at the first light, I see the woman hangup and throw the phone in the car somewhere and collapse onto the dash/wheel crying. Then, at the next light, hunts frantically for the phone and picks it up. Talks more, this time I had rolled my window down. I could hear the screaming and crying. By the end of it I really felt bad for her. I must have just witnessed a life changing phone call of some kind.
First, wife and I were at dinner years ago on a date night at a local restaurant. Nice place. Kind of early to beat the rush and our oldest was really young at that point. The only other people there are a table of 8 or so seated at a big round table about 15 feet away. This mix of men and women apparently were local developers, and politicians, gaming on their schemes over dinner. You'd think the morons would at least talk in a way a little more conscientious of people being able to hear. I think this is where I lost faith in most any government at all hearing a bunch of local reps basically laughing it up about selling out some constituents angry about a rezoning in their area for another 50th grocery store within a mile of each other. Pretty much quote was "ah, don't care about those bozos, we'll get you whatever you need for your project". Burn, burn long and hot.
Second one, I'm in the shitter somewhere years back. Probably the airport. It's quiet. Guy goes up to the urinal while talking on the phone. I'm blasting some nice loud farts, and maybe even tossed in a childish armpit fart or two just to see what they'd do. Nothing, kept on talking even while they pissed. Then, mid piss, dude drops the phone into the urinal. Then a cuss storm that would make someone with tourettes blush.
Third one, just the other day I'm walking through the Easter candy section of Target and hear a woman in the most ice cold voice asking for stuff back over the phone "and that was a wedding present, I'm really going to have to have that back, like now". Whew, and the resting bitch face, yowza.
Next, file this one under "we're all racist to a degree".......I couldn't hear what kicked off he exchange, but a black guy had finished ordering at a McD and overhears something he doesn't like from the latino guys who rang up his order.......and responds with a tongue lashing en espanol muy lindo. The two guys look horrified.
Next, watched a 12 or 13 year old get clotheslined leaving a Target one day at full sprint and cuffed. Like, Terry Tate office linebacker style. The workers told me after I saw it that they had the kid on video at least 3 or 4 times coming into the store and loading a cart with the most expensive things he could find that weren't locked down. Dysons, electronics section, etc..... Then he'd literally just sprint out the front and into the woods or something nearby and go sell the stuff. How his parents didn't know, you'd have to be a moron. Oh Timmy, where'd the money for that $3000 in computer gear come from? Mowing lawns, right.
Last one I've got for now. Not sure what it was, I'm guessing a breakup/divorce/cheating phone call. I'm one car ahead stuck at a series of long stop lights of a woman talking on her phone. I notice that there is an increase in hand and arm gesticulations and eventually some body convulsions. This is getting good. About a minute and a half in at the first light, I see the woman hangup and throw the phone in the car somewhere and collapse onto the dash/wheel crying. Then, at the next light, hunts frantically for the phone and picks it up. Talks more, this time I had rolled my window down. I could hear the screaming and crying. By the end of it I really felt bad for her. I must have just witnessed a life changing phone call of some kind.
