I asked Santa for a P3 Carbon, but then became concerned that I might not have been good enough this year. Then I though about it more, if you put a pair of Zipp 909s, FAS carbon cranks and HED carbon bars, it is all carbon, so it is very much like a piece of coal. I just wanted to pass this nugget on to all teh naughty boys and girls who may have thought they could not get a new bike from Santa.

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"When I first had the opportunity to compete in triathlon, it was the chicks and their skimpy race clothing that drew me in. Everyone was so welcoming and the lifestyle so obviously narcissistic. I fed off of that vain energy. To me it is what the sport is all about."