I will call it Tibslandia and paint it lavender. I will be heavly armed and have hourly battle drills. I will build a shrine to ironclm on the second floor and declare it my only friend. I will quit triathlon and make the first floor the finest gym money can buy. I will take steroids like they where candy and lift heavy wieght in a wave pattren of lots of sets but never to failure. I will eat a lean high protien diet. This will allow me to pack on 320 pounds of muscle and be %2 bodyfat, all on a 6 foot frame. My mullet will become huge and flowing. I will not take a bride but will instead have a 4 times daily visit from the goat of my choosing. The walls will all be mirrors with wolves and eagles airbrushed on them.

I will look into the sky and see God. His blonde hair will be blowing in the solar winds. He will have on a pink izod with khaki pants and a sweater tied around his neck. I will hate him and he will hate me.



(points to anyone who can say where I got the last paragraph.)

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

Pulp Fiction?

the Bible

 
>>I will quit triathlon

I thought you have never done any races?!

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I have raced. Many times.

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

Ok Tibbs, it's killing me. Where the hell is that quote from!?

http://www.amazon.com/...-9524121#reader-page

The greatest opening to a novel ever. It might be one of the greatest novel ever. The scene later on when he and his wife get stoned off of Abe Lincoln’s morning breath is life changing.

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

Fantastic

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Those who know do not speak, those who speak, do not know.

I presume the suberb Tibbslandia will be in the state of Slowtwitchia?

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kiwipat

per ardua ad astra

Depends on Dan. Gunther will be my press agent and front man. I will not leave the house and Gunther will do all the communicating for me.

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

Cool. Can I be in charge of procuring winsome tri totty for you to feast on? All live on webcam, of course.

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kiwipat

per ardua ad astra

Your hired!

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

May Tibslandia be fully stocked with cold Shiner Bock's, the best beer in the Republic of Texas!

I'll have to check out the book, that quote is just too awesome.

Tibbs - I gotta ask why in the hell you're working at Brown? You really need to get your self that house, quite triathlons, and start taking huge quantities of drungs. Your Hunter S. Thompsonesque writing career thus in full swimg.

There are a ton a mags (Rolling Ston, Maxum FHM et al) that need your articles. We then will take it more big time with books.

I'm offering my driving services. Since I'm now sober I can get you around in safety, but I do have a good knack of having the weird, unusual and inane follow me. Perfect set up for drug induces hijinxs and general bizzar fun - I speak from experience having lived that life for almost 20 years.

We can get a big old caddie convertable with shark skin seats and lavendar finnish. We'll took around the country wreaking havoic (especially at the big tri events) and then return home to write the stroies of a way ward life in the fast lane of Americana.

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http://www.clevetriclub.com

rob reddy

Would you pay to read me? No you wouldn't. My writing is that of an 8 year old but with less skill a creativity.

YOur idea sounds way too great by the way.

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

you underestimate your self my friend

first the average american only has the reading ability of a 5 year old

second (and no offense) but with good marketing, a cool wraper and neato pubilc face you can sell 100% crap to americans at a huge profit

third weird and bizzar sells big time - went to see the Cure last night and it re-confirmed this theory

fourth there is no need for good 'gramatical' skills in today's mass literary society. even if there were we would sell you as advant guard the EE commings of the new mellenium (see I can't spell for shit and most everyone can figure out what I am saying - i've stopped trying)

fifth - with all the adhd, add, learning disabilities et al out there it is just a short matter of time before having and flaunting one of these maladies is seen as cool, progressive and very desireable.

write away brother -

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http://www.clevetriclub.com

rob reddy

Find me an agent you get 15% and become my driver and chemical chooser.

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.