Sounds almost as distracting as the guy singing off key next to me on Saturday. I run without tunes but really wish I had them. Decided it was time to work on my focus.

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Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.

Ahhhh, strange denizens of the treadmill.

1. Feels-the-urge-to-grunt-or-yell-a-syllable-like-"go!"-to-himself-every-three-minutes guy. He sucks. Huge.

2. Eat-a-gel-every-five-minutes-even-though-he's-only-running-25-minutes guy. Gotta have ENERGY! I bet he had a full plate of pasta last night, too.

I am sure he then went and did curls with weights so heavy that when he dropped them they made that "boooommm" that resonates around the whole gym.

Now I remember why I bought a home gym unit.

Anybody have experience dealing with Running backwards on the treadmill guy? He says he does it to work "other muscles" but unless he plans on running his races backwards i dont see the benefit. If you know this guy i could use some help.

Oh by the way, he is also a card carrying member of the lets have an hour long conversation in the locker room about our training with our wangs out club. Yep, there are about 4 or 5 of them and they just seem to love each others company. If you have experience with them, i would love some help.

Why aren't you running outside?

My local Y has that guy too.
But what I want to know from the slowtwitch women is what is the deal with ladies setting the treadmill to the maximum incline and then doing a 'fast walk' while holding onto the console for dear life for 30 minutes straight?
Maybe it isn't everywhere, but at my YMCA that is what 90% of the women do. They come in, get on the treadmill, crank it up to max incline and walk away. What purpose does that serve?

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NOT a fan of the spends-45-minutes-with-my-wang-hanging-out-in-the-locker-room guy.
But, he sure beats the two guys I saw ducking into the shower together the other morning (giggling like schoolgirls).

Anyone else ever get freaked out by runs-really-far-back-on-the-treadmill-(as-in-ALMOST-falling-off-the-back) guy?

We don't have that club at our YMCA but we do have a guy that loves to walk around towel-free and talk to anyone and everyone that comes into the locker room. He'll be in there when I go in for a swim and he's still there (talking to someone else) when I get back to the locker room 30-45 minutes later...

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Ann Arbor Triathlon Club

Follow me on Twitter

Are you in Ann Arbor? I swear to god I saw the exact same thing last week...and see my post above about the spends-45-minutes-with-my-wang-hanging-out-in-the-locker-room guy.

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Ann Arbor Triathlon Club

Follow me on Twitter

Now I remember why I bought a home gym unit.

So you can run backwards faster than you should at max incline for five minute intervals while holding onto the handles and eating gels every few minutes before walking around naked for way longer than you should without having to leave the comfort of your basement?

As I'm off to the gym on my lunch hour, this thread has brought back not-so-fond memories:

* The Wang Guys: We have them too. Usually the older guys who love to walk around the locker room with nothing on and groom in front of the mirror for hours...slap a ton of baby powder on the twins, stick Q-tips in their ears, examine what came out in great detail, etc.

* We had one guy swim in his transparent tighty whities. I kid you not. As I was walking into the pool, he hops out of the jacuzzi and the old ladies who were sitting there where quite shocked. He then DIVES into the pool and swims a couple of laps in the lane next to me. At this point, I'm trying to rationalize that yes, there is chlorine in this pool and it is probably taking care of any schmegma this guy is trailing behind him and that really, tighty whities aren't that much different than a swimsuit...but dang: I don't want to see your package.

* Ditto on the lug nuts who drop the heavy dumbbells. These are usually the really big dudes so I don't have room to make fun of them. That's reserved for the guys who bench press for six hours and have big chests, rounded shoulders and tiny little bird legs.

*

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The Outdoor Journey: latest article - Profile of SlowTwitcher: Dr. Jodi Thomson

Interesting Saturday at my gym.

First, as I'm puffing along on the rowing machine (nicely located in back so not bothered by any of the treadmill antic guys), I am bothered by unbelieveably loud grunts from the free weight area, I mean like a tennis player x 100. When I'm done I go around to see who's making all the noise, I figure its gotta be some huge super fit dude, nope so fat sod.

Secondly, the cops were walking what was probably Mr. Wang Exposer out of the building.

You forgot the guy who spends 30 minutes on the leg press machine- nost of it sitting. 5-7 45 lb. plates per side. legs move about 2 inches during rep.
Extra points for heavy droppers using dumbells- doing flys with about 80 lb. dumbells.- just let 'em go when done!

We have psych-up for five minutes guy. He does a whole routine, shadow boxing, jumping, yelling before hitting each machine. Guy has bingo arms, bird legs and a gut, but gets bonus points for his mohawk.

Two annoyances for me. The first is the "coach" and secondly, sweaty-hairy guy without the towel....

[reply]

* The Wang Guys: We have them too. Usually the older guys who love to walk around the locker room with nothing on and groom in front of the mirror for hours...[/reply]

I had an interesting variation on that guy last winter. He was shaving in front of the mirror wear nothing.... but a heart rate monitor. I cannot figure this one out.

How about:

"I carry a gallon jug of water with me all over the weightroom" guy?

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Ruble Triathlon Coaching Average of 30 coached PR's per year
Florida Triathlon Camps Train in North Americas winter training destination
Ruble Racing Events Midwest Triathlon Racing
Ruble Timing Midwest Event Timing

How about Ultimate Fighter Guy- lots of sparring/karate kicks between reps?
How about stretch everything possible between lifts guy? Ours even stretches his fingers and re-folds his towel. Gets about 5 min of actual work per hour.
We also have an interesting woman- she is small and fit and fond of the standing multi hip flexor/adductor/abductor machine. She puts on max weight and the thing lifts her a foot in the air when she lets the bar down. Looks like she is going for a ride with every rep!

Speaking about the walk-around-with-the-wang-hanging-out-and-clean-my-ears-and-examine-and-tonic-my-hair-guys, could someone please explain to me why this person must dry off (all body parts, mind you) with a hair dryer??? I mean, wouldn't it be much easier and faster to dry the twigs & berries off with a towel???

And if anyone has an answer for this - could you please explain why one has to do it while staring at self in the mirror???????


Please - I'd love to know, because it ruins my appetite every time I see it......

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"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

Ahhh....we cant let the newbies miss my "Open Letter to the YMCA" from Feb 05...

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

These guys also always have their gym bag with them at all times.

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Proud Founder of the Jamis Mafia- Daring to be different.

But what I want to know from the slowtwitch women is what is the deal with ladies setting the treadmill to the maximum incline and then doing a 'fast walk' while holding onto the console for dear life for 30 minutes straight?

What makes you think that the slowtwitch womens (TRIATHLETES) would know the answer to this? We can't magically read the minds of others just because they have the same type of reproductive parts.

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Awww, Katy's not all THAT evil. Only slightly evil. In a good way. - JasoninHalifax

 
Becuase that burns more calories according to the machine....duh :D

I dont buy that? Where do you think the aliens got their communication ability on Independence Day? This no doubt was contrived by some genetic female communication system that we men know exists...but cant yet figure out. Your minds are all connected somehow....I know it...

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

My bad,,,I only asked because I've only seen one guy ever doing that and I figured it was a female thing.
Not that any of the triATHLETE women on this forum would do it, but I just thought maybe you had an inside track on why other women do ;)

You know, like maybe one day at the gym one of the 'steep walkers' would tell you to quit doing your long run or your tempo work or intervals and tell you that you could be saving a ton of time and or effort by letting you in on their secret. My best guess is that is has something to do with tightening up the rear end and is just for looking good in tight outfits and is not meant to help them qualify for Kona. Maybe it's localized to my Y. Maybe they're training to be on next years expedition to Mt Everest. Anyway, it's funny that on any night you can go in and there will be 4-5 treadmills in a row pointed to the sky with women walking away at 4mph!

But I guess it's better to look at fit women walking up to nowhere than naked wang guys that never leave the locker room and never workout yet are always there and naked for hours at a time! (They must be a requirement in most health clubs as everyone seems to have them!)

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Hahaa...nice.

Or how about the punk kid who comes in from the basketball courts wearing jeans and trys to run on the treadmill? He usually lasted about 3 minutes at 8 mph. Seeing this display of "unfitness" was always the highlight of my workout

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Ruble Triathlon Coaching Average of 30 coached PR's per year
Florida Triathlon Camps Train in North Americas winter training destination
Ruble Racing Events Midwest Triathlon Racing
Ruble Timing Midwest Event Timing

One word: Ipod.

I purposely wear the ugliest clothing, baggy stuff if lifting, don't do my hair etc. This way you just blend right in with the walls. I get the hell out of the gym asap and use my music to ignore the loud grunting of the guys using 80's on incline press with form so bad it would be illegal in a more enlightened society.

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___________________________________________________
Team Medique Powered by Silber Investments

They are targeting their butt is all I have come up with?

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Ruble Triathlon Coaching Average of 30 coached PR's per year
Florida Triathlon Camps Train in North Americas winter training destination
Ruble Racing Events Midwest Triathlon Racing
Ruble Timing Midwest Event Timing

That is disgustingly delicious.

When I find myself overeating on Thanksgiving day, I will picture what I just saw this morning...... oh, great - now I guess I'm skipping dinner tonight.....

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"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

You must belong to my gym. I notice he almost never touches the weights.

There's consistently a guy in the weight room at the Y that takes a long lat-pull bar and swings it at a padded wall. I think this is softball "batting practice" because the guy is about 40 lbs overweight, but is constantly swinging that damn bar every week. I can't imagine a more jarring exercise. The guys cartilage must be in ruins.

Then there's the couple where the guy "knows all about weight-lifting" and puts his newbie petite girlfriend on the incline leg-press with 200+ lbs! I only noticed after the girl started saying, "Shit. Shit. Shit." as she was slowly compressed by the load. I was happy to see that one of the YMCA staffers took issue with it and told the girl she was going to hurt herself. I guess smashing the wall is ok.

I love these threads! I've seen backwards running guy on the treadmill before as well as they guy who looks to see how fast I am going and then wanting to "race" me on his treadmill. I've also seen the guys that drop the heavy dumbells - there was a guy at the local Y that I used to go to who when he'd do flys with the biggest dumbbells on the rack would yell out in agony with each rep like his nuts just got caught in a vice.

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"You can never win or lose if you don't run the race." - Richard Butler

Now I remember why I live in Floriduh. It's going to be a brisk 70F when I go out for my 7 miler tonight!

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Sure - rub it in. Heat wave in Chicago and it's only 55, not to mention dark and misting......

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"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

I thought our uteruses (uteri?) were for locating lost objects ("Honey, where is my ....?"), not for mind-reading.

;)

hiya, Katy!! how ya doing?

powergel on a treadmill just sounds expensive (not to mention rediculous). glad nobody was ON the stairmaster - or were they??


.

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"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

Why aren't you running outside?

Doing something in the gym is always last resort for me. My preference is to always do it out side.

It was quite cold yesterday morning( -3C when we started) but we got in a pleasent 4 hour ride.

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Steve Fleck @stevefleck | Blog

Chip, perhaps this is why Mr. T once said, "You don't need a gym. The World is your gym!"


"Be somebody. Because if you ain't somebody, you're somebody's foo"

Dan
www.aiatriathlon.com

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http://www.aiatriathlon.com

I have no clue as to the accuracy of this but I hear that the whole backwards walking/running thing is supposed to be far better for maintaining mobility in the elderly that walking/forward. Guess it is very big in China.

My personal favourite, does one 30min PT session a week but
is never to be witnessed again dude

Oh yes, the Uterine Tracking System....

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Awww, Katy's not all THAT evil. Only slightly evil. In a good way. - JasoninHalifax

i like the guys that come in to the gym wearing what would appear to be street clothes. except that they throw on some sneakers or maybe some lifting gloves, which i guess makes the ensemble gym worthy. i was beside myself watching this one guy hammer on the elliptical with a short sleeve button-down and black jeans. at least he still had all his jewelry on :-P

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"Pops trippin'. He want me to ask for my bike back. You know i wouldn't trip."

Yes, the local gym is a strange world. Recognize most of the characters cited here. Backwards running guy, sit on leg press guy, steep incline lady (they always hold on to the rail, if you hold on to the rail isn't that the same as if the thing is level, like maybe you could sit in a recliner but have a treadmill turn under your feet, i dunno), cloppy old runnin' guy with headphones on treadmill (why does he yell? turrets? is he watching Fox news?), naked old guys in the locker room (so I'm getting to my locker and there's this dead ringer for 'ol fat bastard' on the bench, he slides over to give me room leaving this wet, slimy trail, I change standing up, I hope I didn't offend), but (no pun intended) bar none best was the guy who shaved his whole body poolside then jumped in the pool to rinse off, got out, oiled up, shaved, back in the pool to rinse, had to complain about that one.

Gotta go, late for a pilates class.

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Jim_n_La
...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but only until it kills you - Cousin Elwood

It was 72 for my lunch run today, my shirt was a little wet around the collar when I finished.

Back on topic, I go to a university rec center and no matter what time of day the same 3-4 older wang guys, I assume they are professors, are always having a STIMULATING intellectual conversation about some quantum efficient market hypothesis big bang history philosophy theorem. Why is 1-2 of them always sitting on a bench and the other one(s) standing 6 inches from their face?

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Brawndo's got what plants crave. Brawndo's got electrolytes. And that's what plants crave. They crave electrolytes. Which is what Brawndo has. And that's why plants crave Brawndo. Not water, like from the toilet.

OMFG!!!

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

Pool Guy might take the cake as worse offender. That letter to the Y was really funny.

They come in, get on the treadmill, crank it up to max incline and walk away.

I see that too. Don't understand. My favorite is the 3-minute muscular endurance workout:

1. Walk 1 minute
2. Set the speed to 8.5-9.0 & run like crazy, 1:45
3. Walk 0:15
4. Hit the showers

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king of the road says you move too slow
KING OF THE ROAD SAYS YOU MOVE TOO SLOW

Not a lot of scary naked going on in the women's change room at my gym but we have "Tammy Faye" who takes up the all counter space in front of the mirror to do her make up. I swear she has enough stuff to do the entire cast of a Cirque du Soleil show.

I think she's related to the woman who takes up all the bench space in front of the lockers and glowers when you ask her to move her stuff so you can get at your locker.

One day, there I was at the gym, minding my own business in the pool area.

I had finished shaving, and jumped in the pool for a quick rinse. A few minutes later, this scrawny little bastard shows up with the manager...

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"You'll find a slight squeeze on the hooter an excellent safety precaution, Miss Scrumptious."

"I can live with doubt and uncertainty and not knowing. I think it is much more interesting to live not knowing than to have answers that might be wrong." -- Richard Feynman

Classic. Almost as good as the "Strange Denizens of the Pool" thread, but not quite... :)

We've had multiple sightings of this one dude who stands there spreading lotion over every square inch of his nekkid body wearing nothing but a very ratty looking ball cap, and watching himself in the mirror while doing so. WTF? Put some damn underwear on, fer gods sake. Nobody wants to see that shit.

Last time in the pool I sighted heinously unbalanced dude...you've all seen him...he only breathes to one side. The side he breathes to gets the arm whipping up into the air and coming down like a depth charge, while the entire other arm barely exceeds 1" above the water. He also likes to wait at the end of the pool, and after a 5 minute rest, take a huge push off the wall and race you to the other end, then die while holding on while you continue on your merry way.

Spot

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Taco cat spelled backwards is....taco cat.

The other day I am at the gym running at a nice pace nothing to hard core. I am wearing shorts and a t-shirt. On the treadmill next to me some 20 year old gets on with a full sweatsuit, hoody and all. He cranks the treadmill up to 10 mph with no warm up. At this point I slow down to make sure I don't miss anything. After about 45 seconds he must be starting to get hot because he reaches down to remove the hoody. I actually stop running at this point. He pulls up quickly while still running 10mph. The hoody gets caught on his head. He hits the deck and the treadmill shoots him tumblinh out the back about 12 feet till he hits a stairmaster. Hoody still stuck on his head. I am laughing my ass off and feeling kinda bad but not bad enough to stop laughing. He pops up rips off the hoody and jumps back on the treadmill. Runs for 30 sec more and calls it a day.

At our gym, we've got the skinny lady who skips the stairs and takes the elevator upstairs to use the treadmill and stairmaster. After she's done, she takes the elevator back down. Always.

Wonder if she has acrophobia.

don't forget the guys who load up a ton of weight in a squat rack, only to perform 1/3rd of the squat, nowhere near as low as they should be.

and the guy who sweats like buckingham fountain, and never carries a towel, so you have the privelege of cleaning it off before you use the bench, we should feel so honored to clean their sweat.

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Tigers love pepper, they hate cinnamon.

I have seen this too many times. A lot of teens, early 20's like to hit the gym in their go out clothes to get that 'pump' before a big date. Awesomely pathetic.

In fact, one of the gyms I belonged to was most busy Friday and Saturday nights from like 5-7, and almost everyone one of those guys fit the description above.

How about the old guy that swims in a bucket hat (picture John Candy in The Great Outdoors) and never gets it wet?
Saw that in a YMCA in SW Florida. He was pretty slow but he was out there doing it! He was even chatting up the lifeguard while swimming.
Funny stuff

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"thoughts become things, choose the good ones"

How about the people that don't know what the big black line on the bottom of the pool is for? Or the guy that thinks he should be in the fast lane during lap swim? ARGHHH.

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"thoughts become things, choose the good ones"

By any chance do the women you see doing this have a big chest? One of my friends who has had two boob reductions but the girls just keep on coming back (although she is pretty tiny otherwise) complains that running hurts her chest no matter what bra she uses and she swears by the steep incline walk up the treadmill. It allegedly burns close to as many calories as running.

Or how about the rec center that closes off three full lanes of a four lane pool for three old ladies doing water aerobics? Can't they do that in the kiddie pool??

Not really. :(
I will say that the majority of women that do this though do look to be the more fit ones in the gym.

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My personal fave: the guy who gets on the stairmaster, turns it all the way up, and supports his entire body weight with his elbows on the handrails while his legs spin furiously through the air beneath him. I'm pretty sure he just lightly brushes the step with each foot strike.

We had a little guy for a year or so, would squat down in the shower, pull out the razor and give himself a nice close shave.

I usally hauled ass out of there ASAP.

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Listen, Lupus, you didn't come into this life just to sit around on a dugout bench, did ya? Now get your ass out there and do the best you can.

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This quitting thing, it's a hard habit to break once you start.

hahhaha this thread is great. We have an infamous lady who is a personal trainer at the gym back home. I think she's eastern european or something (heard her talking once). Nothing wrong with her or her workout or anything, but she's got a reputation for being kinda butch (manly, buff, etc.). I mean if you could imagine; her calves are bigger than her upper legs. I saw her doing calf raises one day and I swore right then she probably could beat josiah middaugh running up a hill. Nothing I've seen that's too weird at our school gym, except from the span of when it opens (6:00) to about 3:00 there's maybe a total of 30 people who have visited and done their workouts. From 3:00 to the latest I've ever been there (maybe 7 ish) there's about 300 people who have come.

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"I like to start out slow, and then taper off."

-Doug Thorne (TVHS XC)

If you have the gloves, foot covers, and something over your face/ears, you are good to go.


I go outside no matter how cold it is, though in DC it can get to only about 0 F (and -20 or -30 F with windchill and apparent wind)- so not too bad. I lost a weekend or two last winter due to the bums not clearing the roads of snow but that's it.

I don't know where R10C is so I realize you can get super cold some places.

Although probably not the types you are talking about I know 2 women who do something like this.

1. Lady doing tris as part of a weight loss strategy. Overweight, has had problems running more than every other day, so one of the days she does 30 minute walk workouts with 4 minute intervals of putting up the slope as high as she can stand. Gets her heart rate up, works her legs and is reasonable practice for walking the hills at local races.

2. Lady 2 is over 50 and has problems with arthritis in hips and knees. Does the same workout for much the same reasons.

I signed up for the fitness center at the local junior college where I was taking summer school a few years ago. It was disturbing to see older women there who get on a stairmaster/stationary bike or whatever only to stop as soon as the begin to perspire, because they dont want to get smelly from working out.

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Tigers love pepper, they hate cinnamon.

Thank God we are all perfect !


Re:
"You forgot the guy who spends 30 minutes on the leg press machine- most of it sitting. 5-7 45 lb. plates per side. legs move about 2 inches during rep. "

This is actually a legit power training method called Static Contraction Training.

How about the guy that shaves his legs in the sauna?;-P

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Gary Geiger
http://www.geigerphoto.com Professional photographer

TEAM KiWAMi NORTH AMERICA http://www.kiwamitri.com, Rudy Project http://www.rudyprojectusa.com, GU https://guenergy.com/shop/ ; Salming World Ambassador; https://www.shopsalming.com

I have a buddy that use to do something similar, he was a triathlete but more into mtn. biking, problem is he never trained for any of it. Whenever we'd go for trail riding he'd have to stop every so often to catch his breath but he'd make it look like there was a something wrong with his bike, problem was I knew plenty about bike mechanics to know nothing was indeed wrong.

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A friend will give you an alibi, a best friend will help you burn the body.

.....and then there is the guy that pees in the shower....

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I shall never misuse Rex Kwon Do
I shall be a champion of freedom and justice

As Kramer once put it, it all goes into the same place!!!

My wife once had a woman next to her in the locker room insert a "feminine product" with once foot on the bench. I believe she did complain.........

Sorry I had to go there......

.

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"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

I've got two, but you have to keep in mind that this is a corporate gym so the only people that go there are employees in my building (50 story building in downtown Denver). I see these people all the time outside of the gym.

1.) Overweight older guy who works out without a shirt on. Typically hops on the elliptical for 30 minutes or so, works up a good sweat, does his rounds on the nautilus machines, and off he goes to the locker room. Gets naked, sits on one of the two benches in the locker room and pretty much hangs out for another 10-20 minutes before hitting showers.

2.) I think this guy is actually pretty cool because I can't do what he does, but it's weird nonetheless: Middle-aged man who seems moderately fit comes in the gym, goes to one wall, does a handstand and walks on his hands around the room (400 S.F., max) for about 10 minutes, gets back on his feet (beet red face) and calls it a day.

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Existence precedes Essence.

Yea, our master's group has to share 3-4 lanes with the water aerobics ladies, somehow they all manage to gravitate toward our lanes. The kicker: lady says 'could y'all not splash so much, it's getting my hair wet'...lady you're in a pool, it's possible you could get wet. Who knows with my PF and bum hip I might be joining 'em next year, some of 'em are kinda cute, hey where's my free coffee?

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Jim_n_La
...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but only until it kills you - Cousin Elwood

[reply]
As Kramer once put it, it all goes into the same place!!!

My wife once had a woman next to her in the locker room insert a "feminine product" with once foot on the bench. I believe she did complain.........

Sorry I had to go there......

. [/reply]

I think it was actually George Costanza, and the line was "It's all pipes!"

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Some are born to move the world to live their fantasies...

https://triomultisport.com/
http://www.mjolnircycles.com/

ok - whatever. thanks for taking the fun out of it......

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"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

Let's see, have only had a couple moments inside this year, but in the short time I have become re acquainted with.

I am going to pound my knees into oblivion on the dreadmill dude. - He is so freakin loud and he can make it sound like he is running on a tin roof.

I am pushing 20 watts spin girl while I read my Cosmo. - Total waste of a machine. She might be on there for an hour, but in the process gained some weight from the Luna bar she ate earlier.

It's November, but honestly my George Hamilton tan is natural. - I have seen beef jerky that looks better then their skin.

There are 15 other showers available, but I am going to take the one next to you dude. - Where has the etiquette in this country gone?


There are obviously lots more that I met last year, but haven't seen yet this year. I am sure I will be forced to re acquaint myself with them.

Confession: that might have been me. Sorry, nothing I can do about it. I just have a hard strike. (but my knees are fine.)

Is Run-Really-Far-Back-Guy tall? I always seam to be running way further back on the dreadmill then most, but I'm 6'4" any closer and I hit the front. Maybe my treadmill form sucks - which could be why I hate it so much.

Anybody have a Spinning Barbie at their gym? You'll recognize her as the one with more makeup on than a kabuki actor cranking 130+rpm while ignoring the instructor. Fun to watch though.

My favorites where the people in spin class who are spin instructor zealots. If the instructor says "faster" they go up to about 200rpm and bounce all over the place. if the instructor say to lean forward over the bars they have their butt sticking up like a centerfold.

One other type is the jewelry women. You know the ones who do a legit workout wearing big earrings, rings, etc. I must confess my wife used to wear here rings until I finally talked her out of it...but then it took her two years to understand why I take off my wedding band when i train or race.

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Proud Founder of the Jamis Mafia- Daring to be different.

I'm 6'5" and run WAY farther forward than this dude. I'm not exaggerating when I say that he is an inch or two away from face planting.

My YMCA is over run with old-saggy-sack-guys. It's not bad enough that we have to deal with old naked guys parading around but we also have old-dry-your-asshole-by-bending-over-in-front-of-the-wall-mounted-handdryer guy. It's just unbelievable.

odd side note:I had a buddy who we swore was doing the same thing, but just "felt bad/dizzy/sick/whatever". Turns out he had enlarged ventricles in his brain, putting pressure on his brain stem. Some surgery and a giant scar up the back of the neck later, and he's placing in local races...

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If I don't, who will? -Me
It's like being bipolar in opinion is a requirement around here. -TripleThreat

After swim practice last week, I headed into the shower for a quick rinse.... stopped dead in my tracks... did a quick about face and rapidly retreated back to my locker and the exit door...

... a woman had pulled a chair up under the shower and was sitting in said chair with her feet propped on the wall, legs spread wide, shower aimed right in between, while masturbating.

I'm gonna start changing in the men's locker room.

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Good thread. Let's see what we've got here...

1. The guy that fights for the closest spot to the front door so he doesn't have to walk very far before working out.
2. The guy that sits on the changing bench naked and then sssslllliiiiiiddddddeeeeessss over when he sees he's in front of your locker.
3. At the university gym, there are the gum poppers and loud phone talkers on the line of exercise bikes. Several do a good workout, but there are a couple of them with the resistance set on 1 and turning about 60 rpm while spending most of the time talking on the phone (and making sure everyone hears how important they are that they have people to talk at constantly).
4. The indoor track at the university gym has two lanes. Inside lane for walking and outside lane for passing. There is always some pair of friends who just have to take up both lanes and get irritated about all the people that try to pass them by.

Of course, working out at the university gym has it's benefits.

1. Olympic size pool where I haven't had to even share a lane in 3 years.
2. Full-size, permanent locker storage.
3. indoor track, grass field, and university caliber track
4. 4 separate weight rooms (2 of them sometimes have classes in them)
5. $4 a month dues

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You're not stuck in traffic. You ARE traffic.

You must know my fiancee!

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"I'm Worth A Million In Prizes"

OK - I think you win - that's horrendous....

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"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

And I'm gonna start changing in the women's!!

We have the weightroom attendent who wants to carry on an extensive conversation while I'm in the middle of a set. We also have this guy who stands in front of the mirror and does dumbbell bicep curls...without the dumbbells, no weight at all. And he does them really fast. I don't get it.......

I think it's uterussies ;-)

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Jim_n_La
...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but only until it kills you - Cousin Elwood

Wow!! How old was she??

I just knew that sorta stuff was going on in there and what about sorority houses with those pillows fights in their undies, that's true too isn't it?

By the by, you're welcome in our locker room anytime. Funny story (well sort of funny), I went to small grad school where the just built gym only had locker rooms for guys, no problemo until a female showed up to work out and decided what the heck I'll shower with the guys and she did! well there were separate showers shortly after, one of those coed things that didn't quite work. And boy did I have some clever things to say to that girl later that afternoon when I was finally able to pick my jaw up off the floor, course by then the moment had passed (honestly I couldn't remember anything about her but t*ts, I suppose I was caught staring), but next time baby I'll be ready.

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Jim_n_La
...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but only until it kills you - Cousin Elwood

You gotta love the psyco dad who now that middle school football is finished over sees his sons weight routine, with a copy of flex magazine and Arnolds Pumping Iron....who shouts at his son not to be a wimp (or worse) and then proclaims to all in hearing range that his kid is going to make varisty as a freshman...(which is cool i guess if he is ready to be hated when his son is an adult).
and my second favorite is the pool nut man/woman who is always old and fat. This is the person who hasn't replaced their speedo like swim suit in 20 years. Sometimes the sight of this makes me leave the pool and wish that i was a runner and not a swimmer.

I got a nice chuckle about your "sorority girl pillow fights in underpants" comment!

I am surprised no one has mentioned... "the nail clipper". Guy standing with foot on counter snipping away and cutting flying all over the place. Can ignore most things but not that one.

Stupidest thing ever seen in a gym was guy getting off one machine while being distracted by gorgeous woman across the room and stepping right into sharp edge of another machine, resulting in cut scalp bleeding profusely.

Damn, did I feel like an idiot.

OK, this is something of a non sequitur, but if you haven't seen this yet you have to. It's treadmill-related.

It's the treadmill video by OK Go. Unbelievable. The best part is it's a continuous take; how many times do you think they had to film this before they got through it perfectly?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pv5zWaTEVkI

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Outside of my bike, my running shoes are my favorite things. Inside my bike, it's too cramped to run.

Gotta say, I laughed out loud at that one!

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"I'm Worth A Million In Prizes"

Oprah reccomends pumping up your treadmill walking by adding an incline. I can't imagine walking on a treadmill for more than 5 or 10 minutes as a cooldown (and God forbid one of these treadmill walkers switch to an elliptical!), but plenty of ladies take her advice. Yes. Oprah's exercise tips. If it works for Oprah, it could make you 175 lbs too.

But hey, she's run a marathon and I haven't, so maybe incline walking is the key we're all missing out on.

My personal favorite is this:
-person who walks up to a treadmill covered in all my stuff- towels, powerbars, water, ipod etc
-sees me on the floor at the back of the treadmill bending over trying not to throw up after an insane ramp test
-does not notice that my treadmill is still going 12 miles an hour (and making a lot of noise)
-then gets on the aforementioned treadmill thinking its stationary, gets fired off hte back into me onto thet ground, and then looks at ME like im the weirdo

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Proud member of the Guru Cartel, EH!

"I'm gonna start changing in the men's locker room."

F*ck that! Send her to the men's locker room and make everybody happy!

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"I'm Worth A Million In Prizes"

If I may repectfully disagree:

You see, women are actually the more evolved of our species; it's in the Bible. Whenever God created something, the next thing He did was better; Day and Night, Heaven and Earth, Oceans and Sky, Birds and Beasts and Fishes, etc. until He created Man. Then he took a moment and created Man 2.0 - the upgrade which is now called Woman.

Frank Zappa[/b] interlude: "In The Beginning ... God made three great mistakes ... First, was called 'Man' The second was called 'Wo-Man' The third was The Poodle."

Now women are a superior model to men because of one great thing ... symmetry. They don't have any odd appendage that seems to just be stuck on as an afterthought. All exterior features are paired up nicely left to right, and for every graceful curve to the front, there is a corresponding arc in the rear.

The symmetry extends down to the genetic level in the XX chromosome pairing.

Being the more highly evolved creature is what gets the female human (ovo sapien???) into trouble. As in every popular science fiction story of the 50's and 60's, what do all alien visitors form more advanced civilizations have in common??? ... That's right - telepathy!!! Our women have it, but they can't yet control it. They hear other women's thoughts all the time, which is why arguments can erupt anytime two or more are in the same room.

Face it guys, as more and women take higher and higher offices of power around the world; as cloning becomes as routine as a trip to the dentist; we will be relegated to the station of pets (at worst - or sex toys, at best) reserved only for the very wealthy.

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

Ok, I have to join in.

Does anyone have a too much cologne guy? I know we've all encountered someone like this before but he goes to my gym and its really obnoxious. His stench lingers wherever he has been for HOURS. I've also noticed his workouts are a bit strange.

On practically every machine or lift I have ever seen him attempt, he always does innumerable 1 rep sets of the maximum weight. He just holds it grunts loudly for a couple seconds and then lets it go with a crash. He stands around for a while, reeking of cologne, drinking and chatting. Then back to the 1-rep and hold. Every time. Unbelievable.

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Erik
Strava

Don't forget "The Garlic Lovers", "The Cumin Clan" and "I Really Shouldn't Work Out Being As Drunk As This, But It's Better Than Being Hungover"

I also enjoy the guy with the Navy Seal T-shirt who does "Retro-robics" ... jumping jacks, squat thrusts, and the like.

Not the cologne guy, but this is another guy that's at every gym in America.

He who goes to the dumbbell racks, grabs whatever weight, and stands inches in front of the racks to do whatever workout (usually lateral shoulder raises, to take up the most area). He effectively shuts down the entire dumbbell rack.

This guy pisses me off more than anyone else. You need to know proper gym etiquette.

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Existence precedes Essence.

One guy, covers multiple scenarios:
First he shows up at the pool with 10 minutes left in the lap swim time. He sets his giant beach bag full of God-only-knows bythe locker room door.
Swims his hairyness in his 1970's PE class style speedo for 10 minutes, then hits the shower.
After his twenty minute shower, he's a no towel kinda guy. The clincher, is when he stands, wang out, on the bench for conversation time before he dresses....I guess to keep his feet clean?

This thread would make a good December challenge. Points awarded to all who have the following in their gym:

1. Too much cologne guy/gal. 5 points. 10 points if it's in the pool and you get to taste it in the water when you swim buy.
2. Insane short duration, intense "I'm gonna race you although you are doing 1+ hrs and I'm only doing 3 minutes" on the treadmill guy. 5 points.
3. Naked locker room guy that is there when you start your workout and still there naked when you leave guy (or gal) and you never see them workout. 3 points.
4. Naked guy/gal that blow dries body in inappropriate way with hand dryer. 10 pts.
5. Naked guy/gal that sits in puddle of own sweat/shower water without drying or towelling off first on locker room benches and leaves squishy ass print right in front of your locker when they get up. 5 points.
6. Masturbating girl in shower. 100 points. Must also provide location and typical dates/times for proof;)
7. Super incline treadmill walkers. 5 points.
8. Psycho spinner people that think they could out ride Lance A but probably don't own a bike. 10 points.
9. Takes-up-space social chics that look great but never actually use the machines and or never break a sweat. 5 points.
10. Old droopy guy in shower room that takes chairs out of lounge and sits and washes and shampoos with chair in shower so they don't have to stand. 20 points.
11. Swimmers that do not have any individual sets of anything over 25 yds/meters at a time but still want to race you. 15 points.
12. Swimmers in inappropriate attire in the pool. Examples included in my pool alone: nasty crack whore looking super skinny lady that wears a super skimpy string bikini to her baby and me swim lesson with daughter, dude who swims in sweat pants or baseball pants yet wears a swim cap for better hydro-dynamics, anyone swimming in whitey tighties, swimmers in suits that are see through and well past their prime and people (usually women) who wear t-shirts over swimsuits. 5 points each.
13. Muscle heads that hit the cardio equipment for no more than 10 minutes at a time and brag about how intense they go and what good cardio shape they are in. 3 points.
14. Anybody that has seen someone do something stupid and fall off a treadmill. 30 points.
    

I'm sure more could be added but the gym where the lady was not master of her own domain in the shower is going to be hard to beat.

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[reply]After swim practice last week, I headed into the shower for a quick rinse.... stopped dead in my tracks... did a quick about face and rapidly retreated back to my locker and the exit door...

... a woman had pulled a chair up under the shower and was sitting in said chair with her feet propped on the wall, legs spread wide, shower aimed right in between, while masturbating.

I'm gonna start changing in the men's locker room.

~~~~~~~~~[/reply]

What day and time was this, I think I will start showering in the women's locker room :)


.

Good, but you're letting the tri-geeks off the hook. How about the wannabe who works out (including weights) in full tri kit? We have one at our rec center and he's hairy and has a serious muffin top top that pokes out between his tri shorts and tri top.

What about the locker room phobic...they take their gym bag with them to each machine and then go into the bathroom to change into their street clothes before going home...I can't imagine what their cars must smell like.

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Ann Arbor Triathlon Club

Follow me on Twitter

Excellent set-up and delivery on that one! Never saw it coming...

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"I'm Worth A Million In Prizes"

Blah! You just reminded me that I forgot to do my lateral shoulder raises at the gym earlier. Seriously.

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"I'm Worth A Million In Prizes"

This isn't exactly related to winter-time gym antics but it does relate to gym class. I remember one fellow in junior high that, while showering after gym class, he would get a b**er and run around pissing on people in the shower. He'd always just laugh away.

OK, what follows is a (somewhat) guilty admission:

This is a year or so ago. I'm heading on to a treadmill. The one to my left is empty and on the one next to that is a guy in the middle of his workout. He has headphones on and is running hard with good form - clearly really working and in the zone. I like it - good energy. I get on my treadmill, put on my headphones and start running. I've been going for about 15-20 minutes and I'm feeling good, running hard, music jamming, in the zone myself. At that point a girl approaches the treadmill between us.

Now, it's important here that I point out that neither I nor the other guy realized that the treadmill was running. We would have said something if we did. Truly...

So she steps on and immediately falls on her butt at the end of the treadmill. So...

Still running hard, me and the other guy look over our shoulders at her. The girl looks back at us. He and I look at each other. We look back at the girl. She looks back at us. He and I look back at each other. And...

Continue our workouts.

Not a word had been spoken by any of us. Just the meeting of eyes, so telling.

At this point my girlfriend, who was a few treadmills down, hops over and helps her up. The girl left the area.

Now I won't make any excuses, but by way of explanation: the girl seemed fine. Based on her fall and demeanor afterwards she just seemed totally OK...like she was just pulling a damsel-in-distress bit rather than actually needing our help. And, really, I was having an outstanding workout. Of course, none of this stopped her from cursing us out to my GF later on in the women's locker room. I still wonder about how my GF never told her she knew me...

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"I'm Worth A Million In Prizes"

I got to cry false on that one man...everyone knows you cant pee if you have a boner.

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

Oh, he wuz peein'!!!

OK - Any Chicago area peeps here will know that I'm telling the truth when I say that EBC definitely has all the above - I'm not there anymore - but when I was..... serioulsly, the BEST rediculous-over-the-top-disgusting-rich-fake-wannabes ever collected in one location....

I know - someone's going to point out that I was once a member so........ sorry, beat ya to it.

But really - this gym was over the top!!!

I don't want to come out and say SPECIFICALLY what gym - but the initials should be telling..... Other Chicagoans - you know what I'm talking about???

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"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

"How about the wannabe who works out (including weights) in full tri kit? "

I go to spin class at my gym once a week, there is a girl there who comes in with full bibs/ team jersey and slaps her pedals on the bike. She has yet to make it through a whole class.

On an off-topic yet related note, coaching my son's soccer team years ago, I had a parent who showed up in full tri kit, set up his spin trainer and rode in full aero-mode on the sidelines watching his son play. I almost asked my son to crack him with the ball.

I am curious why you would feel this way. Sounds like a parent training for something but not allowing the training to get in the way of his/her family. When I coached high school hockey I had a dad set up his trainer at the rink during a tournament so that he could watch his kid play while getting his IM training done. Sounds like a good solution to me.

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Proud Founder of the Jamis Mafia- Daring to be different.

The trainer thing seemed more of attention getting than training. These were 5-6 year olds playing a 30 minute game, not an all day tourney.

[reply]I got to cry false on that one man...everyone knows you cant pee if you have a boner.[/reply]

Maybe that's something that happens as you get older. If you've ever changed the diaper on a little boy, you'll quickly learn that if you uncover a little stiffy that you had better cover it up quickly, because he's about to pee all over the place. Tis true.

I guess it all depends on how you want to look at it. I choose to see a parent figuring out a way to get his/her training in without missing a childs game. Obviously you don't.

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Proud Founder of the Jamis Mafia- Daring to be different.

Then there's the couple where the guy "knows all about weight-lifting" and puts his newbie petite girlfriend on the incline leg-press with 200+ lbs! I only noticed after the girl started saying, "Shit. Shit. Shit." as she was slowly compressed by the load. I was happy to see that one of the YMCA staffers took issue with it and told the girl she was going to hurt herself. I guess smashing the wall is ok.


This has got to be the funniest F-in' thread! I've been laughing myself to tears through the whole thing! I love it!

Hilarious! I admit, it's hard to pee in to a toilet with a stiffy, but if you're in the shower (as my jr. high 'friend' was), it's very easy to let it fly.

It makes my gym look pretty darn good!

Although in the womens locker room I have...

Lady who NEVER wears deoderant and she smells. And she admits she never wears it.."if you don't like how I smell, don't stand near me". And she never washes her hands after the bathroom. Ick.

Another lady who NEVER washes her gym clothes. EVER.
When she opens up her gym bag....the smell is enough to make me gag. I'm tempted to buy her a bottle of Febreeze.

The part that gets me...the 2 women are smart, educated and have good jobs. WTF do they not get about personal hygiene?

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Proud member of the Guru Cartel, EH!

Personally I'd take an extra 30 minute workout any time I could get it.

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Ann Arbor Triathlon Club

Follow me on Twitter

it is totally possible to pee with a boner....it just stings sometimes.

Being in Vegas, we have quite a few of the older guys with the wind-tunnel tested shoe polish back hair do's...straight out of casting from any Las Vegas mob movie. They have the obligatory gold nugget ring, velvet-teen track suit/leisure suit, and walk around like every pretty young thang is going to swoon in rapture.

My biggest peeve is not with the clientele however. It's with the Cracker-Jack box club certified "personal trainers." More than half of these clowns look like most of their exercise comes from bouncing on the couch while playing their X-Box and their diet is comprised of Snickers and Mountain Dew. At least the independent trainers look the part.

Ahhh...which reminds me of one more: The trainer who spends more time looking at himself in the mirror than helping his client.

*

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The Outdoor Journey: latest article - Profile of SlowTwitcher: Dr. Jodi Thomson

My God! It's the resurrection of the "Strange Denizens" thread! I haven't been into a gym in at least ten years, and won't after reading these horror stories. Great entertainment!

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My business-eBodyboarding.com

Off topic! off topic! Im not listening, la, la, la...

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Jim_n_La
...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but only until it kills you - Cousin Elwood

Hey, this is the off season - it's close enough!

Were you around for Kittycats "panty" thread?

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

I could be wrong but if you hang on to the console (and I do see the big incline people, both guys and gals, hanging on for dear life) doesn't that offset the incline? I mean theoretically you could sit in a recliner and somehow have a treadmill moving under your feet amd that wouldn't be considered walking at a 90 degrees. Of course it does take some effort to hold on so I dunno.

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Jim_n_La
...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but only until it kills you - Cousin Elwood

I dunno. They're still walking...

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maybe she's born with it, maybe it's chlorine
If you're injured and need some sympathy, PM me and I'm very happy to write back.
disclaimer: PhD not MD

The old East Bank Club is still around? I sold them workout software back in the '80s, they gave me a tour of the place then, it was frickin' huge. The swimming pools were on, what, the 3rd and 4th floors? They had a nice indoor golf range, a few tennis courts inside, a yuppie restaurant and some other high end sort of stuff back then.

You know these threads always end up sounding like we're soooo superior to the ave gym denizen and what get's lost is at least they're walking or at least they moving something or 'fill in the blank', you gotta give most of 'em props for trying and many do stick with it (or to it depending) with varying results.

I was doing something pretty silly looking the other day, rolling on a foam tube for my piriformis (you know you're a geek if you what that is) and a guy from work I see on occasion walks by and jokess to another member 'I wouldn't take that guys advice on working out' and the guy he said it to (a trainer no less) replied 'I've seen him do some pretty tough workouts' Don't know what she was referring to but, hey felt pretty good...I like these peeps, so what if there's a few odd balls and the guy who shaves himself by the pool (you know who you are!) is gone .

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Jim_n_La
...what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but only until it kills you - Cousin Elwood

We have 2 70 year old guys that weight lift wearing speedo-like "shorts". There is a large group of 60-70 year old men that invades the Y weight room for 2-3 hours. They give unsolicited advice on strength training/exercising. They do more talking then exercising but they take up the whole room. Or at least they did. I haven't been there in over a year even though my pool membership pays for a membership there and for the pool. One of these guys does that max incline, hang on for dear life thing.

Our Y pool has a lifeguard that takes naps daily while on the lifeguard stand. She is pretty old (60ish?) for a lifeguard ut old enough that she should be falling asleep everyday. She also power walks around the pool deck. Not a stroll, a power walk. During masters swim, she is always talking to our coach, even when he is trying to talk to us/give us splits/etc.

We don't have too many locker room weirdos. Just the old ladies that sing in the shower really off key and so horribly that you can't even tell what song they are singing. And the occasional naked old lady sitting on a bench talking for 15 minutes. But they are harmless.

what about the "scream abuse at each other weight guys"

was in a gym once, 2 guys, they were doing incline flys, low rep big grunting stuff.
got to last set and they turned into abuse screaming guys

guy on bench screams: "arrrrrgh, go on, aaaargh"
his mate screams: " go on mate, push that fucker, go on"
guy on bench scream: "come on, I am fucking strong aaaargh"
hi mate screams: "go on mate, push it, push that fucker you are so strong you can do it"

this lasted for both their last set. I was the only other guy in the gym and really had great difficulty in not pissing my pants laughing based on the weights they were pushing and that both were 6'3+!!

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bikefitasia.com

Yup - still there. As big and bad as ever. 3 pools - main floor, 3rd and 1 outside. 2 are 25m and the other I think is 20.

To be honest, its the best place I've ever been to workout. The problem was you had to deal with all the people!!! Its one thing to be a casual exerciser, another to be there 110% simply to socialize.

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"I ain't never been nothin' but a winner"
Paul "Bear" Bryant
Roll Tide!!!!

We have a lady in our spin class like that. It's a 5:30 AM class and this woman has totally bathed in Calvin Klein Eternity - most of us have barely gotten the sleep out of our eyes and she smells like she's going on a hot date. Not only that, she's always, always late for class - like 15 - 20 minutes to a class that's only 45 minutes long - and leaves early to boot, never cracking a sweat. What is the point I ask??

The people who push the incline up to 5+ and then hold onto the front console are jolting their back so much they have to be increasing the chance of back injury. Doesn't it make more sense to walk quickly at an incline that you can handle without hanging on?

With all of the naked walking around and hanging out, along with the naked shaving and peeing everywhere, I'm happy to drive the 10 minutes home to shower in my own bathroom.

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Pain or damage don't end the world, or despair, or beatings. The world ends when you're dead, until then you're due for more punishment. Stand it like a man. And give some back.

I'm not sure what her locker room routine is, but there's one on my indoor track that I call "Living Death Barbie"

Apparently she has the world's oldest implants, because scrawny hagged-out 80-year old women shouldn't be that firm and perky.

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

Can I just tell you how high and mighty and arrogant you all sound. Let me tell you what I can't stand at my gym. First the guys on the treadmill that stay on it for more than twenty minutes at a time and have their head on a swivel, checking out every person that starts to work out near them to make sure that they are running faster than me when I jump on to do my wind sprints. Then I can't believe all the dirty looks that I get when I set up my treadmill for my "trekking" workout, whats wrong with a guy powerwalking at max incline at 4 miles an hour, it gets me sweaty. Then when I go get my lift in you should see how some of those holier than thou skinny minnies look at me when I max out on the pec deck, so what if I let a grunt or two out and really am I the first guy to float an "sbd" in the gym, c'mon sometimes when I'm at max effort one just slips out. Don't even get me started on the locker room. Are we really that uptight of a society where a man can't be nude in a men's locker room? I mean c'mon lighten up people.

Always a party pooper....oh, and a DECENT man can be naked in the locker room...during the very breif time he is going for a towel or pants to cover up, this time is less than 20 seconds.


I bet right now on some "IronMan' (the weight lifting site) they have the same thread going on about us jerks who stay in the pool taking a lane for over an hour, running on a treadmill and sweating on it...now that is just nasty. Queers in spandex who wont even try to lift enough weight to gain weight....


In the mean time, the the fun continue.

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

I think some one should check the forum rules about having more than one username.

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Pain or damage don't end the world, or despair, or beatings. The world ends when you're dead, until then you're due for more punishment. Stand it like a man. And give some back.

i have seen overweight older ladies who have boobs that are heading so far south, you can't even see the gut underneath. quite scary. in the women's locker room, the women who can afford to be wandering around naked never do, and the ones who shouldn't, walk around unashamed, lifting up the "girls" for baby powder underneath. i guess i should give them credit for being at the gym and not on the couch but really.....

fortunately, that is just when i am home for break. normally i am in my college locker room which is a much better situation!

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"What am I on? I'm on my bike busting my ass for six hours a day. What are YOU on?" - Lance Armstrong

My pool is ozonated, which is awesome for a number of reasons but the downside is that anyone getting into the pool with strong perfumes on seriously stink up the water. The morning aquasize classes used to be the worst (why put on perfume before getting into the pool?), the closer you got to the class the more you could smell/taste the scents in the water. Happily the masters swim has taken over all the weekday mornings leaving no space for aquasizers.

That guy must have a brother in Michigan. I see him all the time.

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"thoughts become things, choose the good ones"

1. Quote:

   Masturbating girl in shower. 100 points. Must also provide location and typical dates/times for proof
   Lets not forget the forum rules, pics or it didn't happen

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¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Uhumm... I guess you are posting in the wrong forum.

Wow, it certainly took long enough... I've been waiting... but I hate to disppoint you... no pics unless you can download from my brain the image I am desperately trying to erase from my head. You want proof, you'll have to wait and get it yourself. I'll give you the day and time (it was a Friday around 1:30 P.M.), but you'll have to find the place.

Trust me, it happened. If I'm going to make something up, or imagine something that didn't happen, I can assure you, that wouldn't be it :)

~~~~~~~

How about "I'm not gonna dry off in the shower guy" He always has two towels with him but he only uses them after he has dripped a puddle into the locker room and on the bench. He soaks the carpeting, and bench, then prince of a guy that he is leaves his used towles on the floor.

Complete tool

http://www.xtri.com/...p;CAT=21&xref=xx

I hope this isn't ST heresy, but I found this article funny and it reminded me of this thread. Enjoy

OH BOY! looks like every gym has couple of those!

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It hurts so bad, it feels good.

I too had a run-in with "Naked-and-taking-too-much-time-putting-lotion-on" guy. I grabbed my stuff and changed at the next bench. But he doesn't hold a candle to one I never thought I'd see: I looked over to the sit-up mats at the gym and saw a woman doing crunches, on the phone (not that unusual, just stupid), with her f'n Bichon Frise snackdog on her damn lap. By the time I finished my first set, she was gone, and I forgot to ask at the desk if anyone had complained.

Of course, this is the same gym with the valet, so take with a grain of salt (24Hour fitness - Denver, University + 470).

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"All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us"

I have to add:

1. Obnoxious voice girl who talk on the phone while on the stair climber. Everyone hears all her problems every day for at least an hour. This girl is in great shape, but the gossip and her voice is annoying.

2. The guy I named "Spicy". He is of middle-eastern or near-eastern decent. His clothes, his gym bag, this locker, and his body all reek of curry and old cooking oil. No matter where in the locker room I go, or which row of lockers I choose, in he walks and picks a locker right next to mine. I can't imagine what he smells like while he is actually exercising.

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Twitter @achtervolger

Being only 5'6" that would be especially disturbing to me, on so many levels!!!

I saw a new phemonon Saturday afternoon. Apparently this dude forgot to bring soap for the shower, so he loaded his hands up with the pink stuff from the sink. He was pounding that pump like ... well ... never mind what it was like.

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

Perhaps this is a university specific trend, but I have been quite amused lately by a large number of "Mystified and Obsessed with Fluxuating Body Weight College Guys." These guys come in from lifting or shooting hoops and then step on to the locker room scale while fully clothed and wearing their basketball shoes. This ritual is followed by loud, obscenity filled comments about how they weighed a pound more just an hour earlier and then begin a sullen vocal reminiscing about how they used to weigh 172lbs last summer, but now weigh only 169lbs! Is this some sort of reversed eating disorder?

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Dave Stark
dreamcatcher@astound.net
USAC & USAT level 2 certified coach

WHY WHY WHY
do some guys think they have a license to come up to girls they don't know and give us advice about what we are doing?
I was just at the gym, very happy, minding my own business, ipod in ears, doing side raises off of the back extension equipment, when some random guy comes up to me and starts waving his hands at me. I take my ipod off, thinking he has something important to say, like the building is on fire, and he says, "I wouldn't do those if I were you. They'll thicken your waist. Those are the last exercises I would do for obliques." I am completely taken aback and don't know what to say at first, then somehow come up with the brilliant, "No they don't." He counters with "Yes they do" and I am thinking, do I really have to have an argument with some stranger? So I tell him I have masters and a doctoral degrees in an exercise related field, have been a competitive athlete for my entire life, and thank him for his concern for my girth, but really, I'm ok. However, being somewhat oversensitive, this ruins my night and I go home.
So shut up, guys who give unsolicited advice.

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Check out my IMLP Janus Charity Challenge Page
https://www.kintera.org/...&supid=247145789
Raising Funds for Myeloma Research in Honor of my Mom

LOL - tonight there was a girl on an Eliptical. I was on my rat wheel watching her TV sorta....

I swear to GOD that Ted McGregor was on her TV...I had to go up to her machine to get a better look. Pretty sure I freaked her out...LOL

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

Just wait for all those New Years resolution people to hit the gym in January. It is a hoot. Thats the only time I can really stand running 2+hrs on the dreadmill.

HTFU NICHOLE!

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What if the Hokey Pokey is what it is all about?

I'm pretty sure I saw a ~20 yo guy in a diaper the other day. Only caught it out of the corner of my eye and it took a while for my brain to process. I thought maybe there was a medical reason; but he seemed to have no shame as he was casually walking around the locker room, not that there is shame... oh wait, yes there is.

Where do you go to school?! Sounds better than ASU...

Naked Karaoke Guy - he knew every song, well, just the chorus, well mostly [he changed some of the words].

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

Not exclusive to winter time, but the guy who farts out loud during certain postures in yoga class. They don't call it Wind Removing Pose for nothing!

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"You can never win or lose if you don't run the race." - Richard Butler

I don't switch pedals, but I do bring my own bike seat from home and spin in a trisuit. Unlike your example I am there an hour before class and an hour after spinning continously.

Our club has tons of towels I don't know why so many guys walk around hanging out. I heard the theory that you can prove you are straight, because you can walk around a locker room without a boner. Personally with all those ugly guys I can barely walk around the locker room without losing my lunch.

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Swim - Bike - Run the rest is just clothing changes.

Haven't been to a gym in years, do all my workouts at home. Was on a business trip last week, went to run on the hotel gym treadmill. Noticed a guy doing some freeweights. Would do a set of shoulder flys, then go to the mirror, lift up his shirt and look at his abs. Then did a set of curls, back to the mirror to check his abs. Then I notice he goes to the ab machine. One you sit on and do crunches. Does two sets, goes to the mirror, pulls up the sleeve of his shirt and checks his biceps.

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