I really don't see the logic in lying about height. It's kind of hard to hide the fact that in reality you're 5'7" when your profile said 6'! Being that I'm 5'8", I'm gonna notice!

Also I think if you're single too long, you can become sort of unrealistic and picky. In hindsight I think that I met quite a few "possibles" over the course of two years, but I would always find something wrong. I didn't like my husband at first either. I didn't dislike him, just no sparks. He kept talking about some race he was doing in two weeks and something called 'tapering' and gesturing with his hands and stuff. At the time I knew nothing about triathlon, I was a runner. But it was the hands that made me go out with him again, they were just gorgeous. On the next date I realized the rest of him was pretty nice too.

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Nor do I use punctuation in the way a child sprinkles glitter over a ribbon of glue on construction paper - Trash Talk

....my limited experience with internet dating was that you were looking for a needle in a haystack...

a whole lot of people, but very few quality prospects....you might be emailing and meeting people you would never dream of being involved romantically if you just met them in person....

so I tried it and dumped it fairly quickly...

My advice that I give for meeting someone (that I used myself):

Go do a group activity you have a passion for and keep your eyes open...for me it was running club, triathlon events, biking groups....I prefered dating athletes because endurance sports are a passion in my life....I used to joke that all the available women in these groups were all on a first date with me they just didnt know it : ).......I would then ask out whoever tickled my fancy...you know them well enough to know if you could be interested....keeps from wasting time with first dates of people you dont know....


I met the Love of my life at an Adventure Race that I put on....I would put on the events and then encourage the participants to socialize afterwards at a local restaurant...it was a good way to meet women I might be interested in....

My wife never did internet dating, but I highly doubt she would have given my on line profile a 2nd look...I am 17 years older.....I think that would have been enough not to even consider me...but "in person" was a whole different deal....

so my unsolicited advice to women who would like to meet someone: go to group things and be interested...you cant train alone, hang out alone or just hang out with your girlfriends and expect to meet someone....you have to mix and mingle in groups where men are present....

if you interested you interesting..

on the other hand if your bored your boring......

I think that nowadays the 'short' cutoff is 6' since the vast majority of ads I've seen when I was doing the online thing (I am so glad to be out of the dating scene) were along the lines of "6' or taller as I like to wear heels", I swear there were some ads with women about 5'2" or 5'3" STILL looking for over 6', guess they had 10" heels?

I also wonder about why putting an arbitrary height cutoff is seen as no big deal, but if a guy in his ad put 'must be C cup or larger, as I have big hands' he'd be lynched as a caveman: there sure are, or seem to be, a lot of double standards when it comes to dating (and let's not even start about women who on the first date ask you how much you make 'because they like shopping at high end stores', happened to me, more than once).

I never understood having a height requirement.


Then again, I figure at 6', if I had a requirement that I'd only date taller men I'd have missed out on dating some of the best dudes I know. By the same token, I never understood having a cup size requirement.

I DO have a requirement that he have a full set of teeth, or at most of 'em.

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There is no justice, there is only me. -- Death

 

men lie about their income
women lie about their weight

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don't just do something..... sit there

Lying about height always cracked me up. I'm tall, 5'10" and I'd put that down. So many times I'd meet a guy who said he was 5' 9" and he'd keep saying "wow, you really are tall" I quickly realized that a lot guys said they didn't mind dating someone taller, but really, it was an issue for them.

I like tallish women. My ideal height used to be somewhere around 5'7" or so. Now, I tend to go for the shorter girls because they want someone taller than them. I'm 5'10.75" on a good day.

That sucks about the money thing. I don't bring it up. I make good money, but I don't have money if that makes sense. I have some debt and I'm working my ass off to get rid of it. My retort to someone that has a nice house and drives a nice car is that all that proves is that they can spend money but it shows nothing about if they have money or not.

Just to share, I went on this first date about a year ago. On the first date, this girl would not stop criticizing me. Unbelievable!

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http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

I am with you on that one... I NEVER put my salary in my profile, nor discuss how much I make. If I'm asked, I just say my only debt is a bit of student loans and that I'm happy with my pay for my age and experience. I hope that's graceful enough. :)

I've tried the online dating thing off and on over the years. Here is one good experience, and one bad:

Good: I met my best female friend dating online. We dated for a little while but mutually decided we would be better off as friends. She actually ended up meeting her soon-to-be husband (from Australia - we both live in the States) online ironically enough, and I've become good friends with him as well.

Bad: I met a girl online in the military stationed in the Midwest. We started talking on the phone, and hit it off really well. Tons of stuff in common, best chemistry I've ever had, the works. She flew down and visited me for about a week, and both had an incredible time. Long story short, she made some "slip ups" and I found out she had lied about her age (said she was 23, was really 20 - no big deal seeing as I'm 27 - but lying isn't good), and was MARRIED. I had to slowly ease myself away from the situation as I wasn't certain of her mental stability. I haven't heard from her in a few months, thankfully. Just a cautionary tale!

So no REAL successes, but I suppose it doesn't help that I live in Mississippi! :)

But now you have a good story! haha. Wow. Chicks are crazy :)

I'm still surprised this thread hasn't turned into a dating thread. I guys not enough of the single mens are trolling around here haha.

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I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way

I really don't get how some of the dating sites actually have a line where you can put your income, maybe it's where I grew up (Europe) but in my book it is not really something you want to start talking about until the relationship is quite serious... for people growing up here in North America, is it really that common to be open about how much you make on a date? My g/f never asked (otherwise she wouldn't have become my g/f, hahaha) but I am wondering if she's the exception or something.

Nope on the salary info here. I've been dating QRMM for a few months and haven't told him how much I make nor has he told me. I think we both have general ideas, but it really isn't important to either one of us.

My boyfriend and I make about the same salary but we didn't ask each other til it got serious.

Most of my girlfriends are successful professionals and they don't ask how much a man makes on the first couple of dates. But they do WANT their potential dates to be AT LEAST making just as much as they do. Or as they put it, they won't settle for a guy who is not as "successful" as they are.

I've never asked about a guys salary...of course I was in the military for 8 years, and I could look up their salary. I don't care how much they make, but I enjoy doing certain things and hope a guy would like to do certain types of things too, and that usually means a salary of at least as much as mine is required (to ensure there's some savings going on too!) But you can usually tell w/in a few dates if they do or not. I'll probably get slammed for this, but if I see a guy who has 10 credit cards in his wallet and no cash, well, I'm going to assume he's in debt over his head.

Every situation like this creates an opportunity. I've been married forever, but a college friend of mine is divorced and uses the frequent online lying to his advantage. He has a semi-humorous dating profile that stresses the fact that his pictures are current, and he even posts closeups of flaws (just like when you are selling on eBay, etc. - He's got a receding hair line and posts close ups.) He claims that he's gotten great responses, and that it has cut down the number of weirdo responses he gets too.

Exactly what I meant to say. I like to do things (nothing extravagant) but to go out to dinner every once and a while to a nice restaurant, a vacation once or twice a year. If he can't chip in for that, then it is a turn off. I once dated a guy who didn't make as much as I did and was always getting the bill and taking him out. I came to really resent it because I felt like I was his "care taker" or almost like his "Mother". After 2 months, I broke it off. But to the point, I think successful working women want the same in a man and should not have to settle for anything less.

Having been married to someone who is rather lazy and whilst he could have made more than me, he makes far less, I was then the one to step up to the plate and make enough to support our kids.....So now, in divorce, I have to pay him (and the plan was for me to work part time and be home with the kids - HA)

So I now will not date someone who makes less than me - period. I don't need exact numbers, but I have no interest at this stage of my life with being with someone who does not make at least what I do (I don't make that much so the bar is not all that high). I am 46, and by this age anyone I am dating should be pretty well established in the world.

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cat
Sponsored by Suntheanine, Lycored and Celadrin
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>>But they do WANT their potential dates to be AT LEAST making just as much as they do. Or as they put it, they won't settle for a guy who is not as "successful" as they are.<<

Wow, that's pathetic. The guy I'm seeing is a teacher, so I know he makes less than me (and since he told me how much he's getting paid I know exactly how much.) He used to work in Silicon Valley in IT and decided to follow his passion. To me, THAT is success.

clm

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clm
Nashville, TN
https://twitter.com/ironclm | http://ironclm.typepad.com

+1. And well said!

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______________________________________
I know I'm promiscuous, but in a classy way

I can take care of that....

How YOU doin' ?

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Go that way really fast. If something gets in your way, turn.

+2

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"your horse is too high" - tigerchik

I would like to add that:

• This thread is a disgrace - can't talk a little female base politics yet talk about dating and how everyone stretches the truth?
• A huge part with dating is that many people believe they need to make themselves look better than they are during the courtship phase of a relationship - this is just stupid
• I know many women that are on dating sites just so they can meet some dude that will take them for a free meal
• I know many women that do it because they are board

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"your horse is too high" - tigerchik

+3!

Some of my very best dating experiences have been from the "online" world. Like with everything in life, just filter out the negative. Stay away from friends who've "gone cynical" on the whole thing - it could poison your experience or cause you to be paranoid about the people you meet. I found it helpful to try out different online dating services. If one isn't working (or you're meeting too many losers), try a different one.

I don't really know how much my b/f makes. It's none of my business. I doubt he makes more than me, however he A) doesn't have near the expenses I do and 2) is way better at handling money than I am. So really, I'm betting even if I make more, he actually has more.

You apparently dated a mooch. Even guys who make good money can be mooches.

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Awww, Katy's not all THAT evil. Only slightly evil. In a good way. - JasoninHalifax

Like I said before, one can make good money but not have any money.

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http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/