YOU HAD ME AT HELLO!!! ;)

.

Have you ever seen the kind of weirdos that hang out online at free websites likes craigslist and Slowtwitch? That's just asking for trouble.

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http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

No lies! just misunderstanding...


"I am an outdoors type of person." Really means: I train in any type of weather. If it's raining, snowing, 90 degrees w/100 percent humidity, or winds gusting at 30 mph. I don't want to hear any complaints because I will still train in it and you're just a big wuss for complaining about it.

"I enjoy riding my bike." Really means: with or w/o aero bars, alone or in a peleton, I don't care. If you can't do a spur of the moment 30 miler then you're not my type. I will let you draft, but if you can't hang and I drop you - I will see you later. I am a capable mechanic, but don't expect me to change your flats or tune your bike. You need to learn that on your own.

"I enjoy jogging." Really means: Let's run hills until we puke. I have just as many shoes as you only mine are better because they are functional and all look the same.

"I enjoy dining out." Really means: I enjoy eating out, in or anywhere else I can find food. Don't be shy because with the amount of food I eat, you can have that main entree instead of a salad and you will still look as though you eat like a rabbit in comparison. Don't get your limbs too close though as I may take a bite out of you. Most importantly don't expect any taste off my plate unless you can bring omething to the party like more food. Eventually though if your not burning 4,000 calories a day your going to plump up and have a terrible complex due to watching me eat deserts and not gain any weight. Friends and family will eventually decide not to dine with us anymore due to my horrid table manners. Oh, and don't ask me any questions during breakfast, Mid Morning Lunch, Lunch, Afternoon lunch, dinner or Recovery Dinner as it does not lend to efficient food intake.

"I enjoy quiet walks on the beach." Really means: Walks on the beach warming up into an 8 mile run and then plunging myself in the ocean for a 2 miler. If you get in my way you're going to find out what mass start is and let me assure you that you don't want to find out.

"I find fulfillment in charitable work." Really means: If I am not racing, I am volunteering and I expect you to be there along side me as I stand out in 90 degree weather for 8 hours handing out sports drink to cyclists going 20 mph. Just stick the ol' arm out there and hope it doesn't get taken off.

"I enjoy sharing quiet moments together." Really means: It's taper time. Just back off because I am strategizing and in a pissy mood because I am worried about my "A" race and can't workout.

"I am an active person." Really means: Aside from my 40 hour job, and the 8 mandatory hours of sleep a night. 10 hours a week are devoted to me during the off-season and 20 during race season leaving us 4 hours. 2 of which are spent inhaling food and you not talking to me, so let's make the best of the 2 hours we will spend together on average each day. If you are a licensed message therapist or doctor this would make the most optimal use of our time together. Nutritionist is also acceptable, but I probably already know just as much as you.

"I enjoy road trips and leisurely drives." Really means: You have your choice of Wisconsin, Idaho, Florida, California, Arizona, and Canada, but don't expect to do much site seeing. If I get enough support from you we might be able to include Hawaii in there.

"I enjoy site seeing." Really means: Lets grab a mountain bike and get our HR's up to 90%. There's plenty of time to look around on the descent as trees and bushes whiz by you at 40 mph.

"I like stimulating conversation." Really means: while we are running, we can talk about food. Then we can talk about how we decided what to wear on this run based on the temperature at start time versus the temperature at the time we expect to finish, how horribly out of shape we are, how many miles we did last week, and how many we will do this week and next week. Then we can talk about food.

"I enjoy relaxing soaks in the tub." Really Means: I'm going to stop on the way home and buy two bags of ice, throw them in the tub with some water, and sit in this torture chamber for 30 minutes.

"I'm interested in photography" Really Means: My camera is permanently perched a tripod in front of my trainer. I obsess over taking photos of my bike position and analyzing them to get the perfect setup.

"I'm into in technology" Really Means: My HRM and bike computer are my best friends. Until you can give me some hard data that can improve my training, don't bother trying to buddy up to me. You could one day break into the top three if I find you as entertaining on long runs and rides as my mp3 player.

Watch this one go downhill. fast.

http://forum.slowtwitch.com/..._F1/SINGLE_P2154391/

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<If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough>
Get Fitter!
Proud member of the Smartasscrew, MONSTER CLUB
Get your FIX today?

Swimfan: WIN!

Khai: I hope that thread stays alive. I can't wait to watch it go to major FAIL.

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Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

A guy who likes sex?

That's just crazy talk.

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Over 4.5 years bike crash free.

I donno the intelligent and sexy part but I think i can help with the rest... ;-)

I picked out the problem qualification for you.

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There is no justice, there is only me. -- Death

I was married for 15 years to a man with a temper--not violent, but would rant and rave and swear and basically make an ass of himself over just about anything. I won't do that again. That isn't even negotiable. I just am not understanding why it's hard to find what is on my list. Do you think women taking better care of themselves then men? Do the guys have the same complaints?

I just don't think NO temper is possible. A slow temper, an easy temper, but not not temper. I can understand not wanting to deal with a quick temper though.

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There is no justice, there is only me. -- Death

Well, yes. I suppose everyone has a temper of some sort. I just can't tolerate the yelling, out of control type.

But sometimes women deserve a spank or two...

I can't stand the rant. It gets really frustrating when he starts to rant and get in a "mood" about the dumbest stuff, IMO. Security checks at airports, yelling at other drivers, standing in line, basically anything that is an inconvenience has the potential to piss him off. It doesn't happen every time but it is really annoying. I just ignore him now, no need to get sucked into his vortex. I hate it though. I've taken a much more zen approach to all of this after working on it. The only thing that gets to me is stupid drivers. Everything else just rolls off my back.

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Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

But sometimes women deserve a spank or two...

Sometimes a woman *enjoys* a spank or two...

Only if they have been naughty! And dressed in a school girl uniform...

Hey, I'm all for a good costume or two, but "school girl" is out (I've got 2 girls who wear one to school every day).

I can imagine how hard it is to find someone these days. I think Dan and Monty should organize a singles training weekend at Xantusia for all the single ST'ers!! Or, maybe Rappstar can add another forum for singles to meet on Slowtwitch.

How old are you???

If that happened, I bet fulla would be the first person to book his spot.

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http://trainingoferic.blogspot.com/

You should take the reverse tactic and learn to love the rant! I rant all the time (at least when I'm driving). I'm very rarely actually angry, but ranting is an easy way to blow off steam and usually it's funny (at least to me).


Rant on!

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<If you're gonna be dumb, you gotta be tough>
Get Fitter!
Proud member of the Smartasscrew, MONSTER CLUB
Get your FIX today?

T too don't know much about this.Anyway u do according to your wish
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lara

Online Dating

Whats that?????

Your future girlfriend.

Hahaaaa.....!!

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Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce

Hi
I am new to this forum. I don't know much about this forum. My friends told me about this then I saw it. I think your site is providing information about Intervention on Cocaine Addict. I think this site is to be acknowledged to the younger and all the people. I fully recommended this site to all the people.But I don't like it dating in personally.
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For more information please visit the the link.

Online Dating

I was watching some documentary type show today on "dating nightmares". They had a segment about online dating and the dangers and fraud associated with it. Then it's time for a commercial break. E-Harmony ad comes on. Hahaha. Timing FAIL.

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Awww, Katy's not all THAT evil. Only slightly evil. In a good way. - JasoninHalifax

Nice! Love it.

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Jen

"In order to keep a true perspective on one's importance, everyone should have a dog that worships him and a cat that will ignore him." - Dereke Bruce