"you know you're fit when..."

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Swim. Bike. Run. Tacos. Not always in that order.
@ryan_hurley

Years ago I worked as a trainer at a high end downtown gym that was men only. Lots of stories from there about similar things.

The worst was the evening that the whirlpool had to suddenly be "closed" because two men had a party together (or something) and another member walked into the area and found a couple of loads of man candy in the water. Amazing how many high level corporate types are actually quite gay (not that there's anything wrong with that).

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Part of the Slowtwitch Strength Training Association. Picking up something heavier than a bike makes me happy.

Oh my. What IS the worst you seen? No, don't answer it.

depends on where you left them!

This whole thread is so funny.

The worst that has happened to me is having to walk through a cloud of hairspray because a guy was using way, way too much. But that doesn't compare to what some of the others have experienced.

This is quickly bleeding into the 4-year-old "Strange Denizens of the Pool" thread:

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My business-eBodyboarding.com

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https://lshtm.academia.edu/MikeCallaghan

http://howtobeswiss.blogspot.ch/

I've seen a guy sitting straddling the bench in front of his locker with nothing on, his junk all splayed out in front of him, intently reading the newspaper.

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"You can never win or lose if you don't run the race." - Richard Butler

I grew up in sports. Never have thought anything about neked bodies. Hell it's a locker room. I know it bothers a lot of people but never understood it. I can come in change, shower and never notice anyone else. I have to say I do go to my locker take off my clothes walk to the shower , shower, walk back to my locker , dry off somewheere and put my street clothes back on. In high school and college we would be exhaulsted and lay on the benches or floor and talk/rest/ recover and people were undressed half dressed, fully dressed never really noticed. Never saw anyone wrap a towel around themselves. Wehen young we would go to the swimming hole and strip down and swim. In the athletic dorm and training room many people were undressed.

Wow, too many weirdos to count, but the one that seems the most hilarious is the obese guy (really has to be pushing 300) who insists on weighing himself completely naked.

While maybe not the most horrifying or most offensive, it makes me laugh every time. One, you have to walk by the scale to get into the locker room, so it is hard to miss, and Two, do underwear really screw with the results of this man's weight?

All the way, if you let him.

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"I can eat 21 plus a deep-fried turkey!"

The worst for me was when one old guy said to the other, "I don't normally see you with your clothes on."

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speedySTATES

I'm not nudephobic at all, but parading around the locker room just makes no sense. Now if it were a co-ed locker, bow-chicka-bow-bow.

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I'm not a complete idiot, some of the parts are missing.

Kind of 'on topic'

"Male Restroom Etiquette"

http://z-studios.com/films/mre

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**All of these words finding themselves together were greatly astonished and delighted for assuredly, they had never met before**

It is said that when the Buckeyes would lose games, Woody Hayes would conduct the press interviews in the locker room nude... Clears out the reporters...

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When someone pulls laws out of their @$$, all we end up with are laws that smell like sh!t. -Skippy

Sally, you're just being a bit feisty since we found that T1 pic of you and posted it ;)

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When someone pulls laws out of their @$$, all we end up with are laws that smell like sh!t. -Skippy

Pretty humorous thread here. I can deal with naked old men, I now just fear staff infections from locker rooms. Some are nastier than you now. Started swimming at a new pool, with a far less than clean locker room....a week later got a staff infection. 1 week after that when I couldn't move my leg much, and the day before a race, got to have it cut open...mmmmm. Cover your cuts in the locker room or this will happen.
(leg picture deleted, sorry I guess that wasn't too appetizing)

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Ryan Borger - Denver, CO: Realtor. Former pro triathlete/coach. Cancer survivor. podiumproperties.com

Walked into the locker room at work two weeks ago. Turned the corner and was met by the backside of a goat....well that is what it looked like until I realized it was my 54 year old co-worker who decided to do the standing toe touch with the crack towards the door......

geasers sitting in the locker room hot tub nudie was the worst for me - only had to make that mistake once.

oh, and you don't have to set your man bits on the counter while you shave / use the sink. they'll be just fine hanging there for a few minutes.

Saw something earlier today that I hadn't seen before when I went to the pool across the street from where I work to get in a lunchtime swim. As I walk in the locker room, the first person I see has a dress shirt tucked all the way into his briefs so that the end of the shirt tails are sticking out the bottoms where his legs come out. Can't imagine that would be comfortable, but to each their own.

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"You can never win or lose if you don't run the race." - Richard Butler

Ummm... that's what normally happens in locker rooms.

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Running is a gift.

What about the dude that forgets his towel but doesn't realize it until he gets out of the pool, so he stands by the paper towel dispenser and dries off with paper towels.

Oh wait, that was me....

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Eat right. Get lots of sleep. Drink plenty of fluids. Go like Hell.

I came in from a swim at our local middle school pool, turned the corner to the shower and came face to face (or not face) with a 70-something year old guy bent at the waist, spread cheeked, hosing his bunghole. That gave me a nightmare or two

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Rather than look back and say "why?", look forward and say "why not?!"

OK - I have been wanting to get this off my chest now for a year or two.

I finish my swim and return to my locker for my towel only to realize I've forgotten to bring one. Now the gym has
towels available if you remember when you walk in...staffed at the front desk by the high-school girls. Not really an option at this point.

As it happens, the locker room is pretty much empty, and there on the bench is an only slightly damp towel with the
Rec center logo on it. I figure it was washed this morning and only used once... the odds are against the one guy who used it having
leprosy... I triple checked for any witnesses, grabbed the soggy towel and scurried off for my shower.

I just tried to make sure I dried my face with a dry part of the towel...

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" I take my gear out of my car and put my bike together. Tourists and locals are watching from sidewalk cafes. Non-racers. The emptiness of of their lives shocks me. "
(opening lines from Tim Krabbe's The Rider , 1978

My most memorable locker room experience was when I was in high school and was relatively new to the locker room "scene". No way I'm going to strut around the locker room with anything less than shorts and a t-shirt as a freshman. So after a basketball game, the ref and I were the only two people in there and I turn around to have the dude standing right in front of me, naked as a newborn ready to talk about the game. I said my fair share of "uhhhs" and "ummmms" b/c all I could think about was this grown man standing right in front of me with his junk staring me in the face. Been scarred ever since...

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Steve Johnson
DARK HORSE TRIATHLON |