Your swimming stroke sucks because your last bike fit sucks?

Fixed (I shuffled some things...)

12. All of the advice should have been written in pink font but we're too lazy to actually change the font color. Unless, of course, it was good advice. Then normal font color was on purpose.

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Take a short break from ST and read my blog:
http://tri-banter.blogspot.com/

#3 can't be true otherwise Canyon would release their aero data and Lionel Sanders may have won Kona had he not been on a Louis Garneau apparently???

not bad ... but just google urban dictionary slowtwitch for another good take.

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What are you people, on dope?

—Mr. Hand

Thanks for posting, i had no idea slowtwitch had made it to the Urban Dictionary. :)

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"Anyone can be who they want to be IF they have the HUNGER and the DRIVE."

This just made my day

Any pain you have is easily diagnosed and correctable through community advice thereby negating the need to see a real medical professional.

"The Rules" are a super dumb gimmick

You must add Zwift at least 3 times in #9.

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Team Zoot So Cal

Karl wrote:

You must add Zwift at least 3 times in #9.

Yes, or Trainer Road. And if it doesn't get kudos on Strava then it never happened.

13. A triathlon event consists of 6 events:

• Swim
• Transition
• Ride
• Transition 2
• Run
• Make excuses

#7. Nutrition. Or lack thereof. Nevermind, just take BASE salt.....that's all you need anyway.

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Pink? Maybe. Maybe not. You decide.

Nutrition is a subset of Excuses.

Where’s T3?

12. Use the search function (even though it sucks!)

# There is no budget. The more money you spend, the faster you go.

I have worked extremely hard over the years and may be able to dispel this theory. Only a few more years and thousands of dollars to go.

# It's all about the illusion of looking fast whilst racking your bike before a race.

I'm not

Great way to start a gloomy Monday rest day.

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All I Wanted Was A Pepsi, Just One Pepsi

Team Zoot, Team Zoot Mid-Atlantic

Probably best to have T3 straight after the run, then you can save all of your excuse making for one session at the end...

Back when I used to golf I was taught to have your excuses in line before you started. For example, while warming up at the driving range make sure to mention your sore back, lack of sleep, etc. With that in mind, maybe T3 should actually be prior to the start of the race. Perhaps a porta potty?

12. You must post at least one thread about Lionel Sanders, any threads about any other pro Triathletes you must attempt to derail on subject of Lionel Sanders.

The only ones that count

http://www.velominati.com/the-rules/

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

Rule #1: There is a special Circle of Hell for those who fudge their Training Logs

In my mind this is how they're laid down

First Circle: People Who Fudge Their Training Logs
Second Circle: Bike Thieves
Third Circle: Race Bandits, Bib-Swappers, Bib-Copiers, and Those Who Take TWO Finishers Medals
Fourth Circle: Dopers, Course Cutters, and Other Assorted Cheats [may include people having extramarital affairs with a Coach or Running Partner, but not always]
Fifth Circle: Gamblers, Sportswriters, and People Who Make up Charity Scams
Sixth Circle: Sports Agents
Seventh Circle: Team Owners
Eighth Circle: League Commissioners
Ninth Circle: Al Davis ... Alone for now, but saving spaces for Jerry Jones, OJ, Joe Buck, The Krzyzewski/Pitino/Calipari Triumvirate and Roger Goodell

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

13. out of mortification, avoid posting about how the search function actually works great after you actually try it!

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Dan Empfield
aka Slowman

that's gold. didn't know that. my favorite part:

OP: How can I improve my running? I run 2x a week.
ST #1: Run more. You'll get faster.
ST #2: Do you have any data to support that claim?

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Dan Empfield
aka Slowman

For every PT/MD/STer who says there is absolutely one single and perfect way to do anything [and they have the data to support it], there is another PT/MD/STer who will say that way of doing whatever it may be, is completely and absolutely bullshit [and they have the data to support it, as well]

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

coffee on the keyboard, nice one

Busted for course-cutting, shamed, and never heard from again







Oh, you meant the actual T3

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin

13. You have to be in love with Lionel Sanders. He is the Messiah of Triathlon and he is here to defeat the European domination. Also if he doesn't win a race, you can always find the excuse on Slowtwitch.

I don't know man, i think most guys would need to refuel and rehydrate before they're ready for a good T3 performance. :)

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"Anyone can be who they want to be IF they have the HUNGER and the DRIVE."

only one to add

A1 - my search for a "forever" tri bike ended when I bought my Cervelo P1, my wired Powertap rear (with a Bike Builder wheel cover), and my Zipp 404 front (featuring the proven benefits of the toroidal shape). I learned all of that when I signed-up in September 2009. I doubt anything has changed since. seriously, who needs more than 9 rear cogs? IMR???

7+ year old gimmick website. That was lame then, and sad now. That and Bikesnob and other crap like that are well left in the past, where they belong.

I could make an easy argument to add Art Briles to this circle

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When all is said and done. More is usually said than done
Ba Ba Booey

And the entire MSU Athletic department [all sports, all coaches, staff, everyone]

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"What's your claim?" - Ben Gravy
"Your best work is the work you're excited about" - Rick Rubin