My kids and my new dog. I am so wanting to get where I was. Since I started running at 12 till I joined the Air Force my parents would buy me a new pair of running shoes at Christmas and my Christmas afternoon 10 miler in the new shoes was the joy of my life. The ability to just say "Hey I am going to go run 10 miles" and feel great at the end was incredible.

So I guess what keeps me attempting, not much going right now, is the pure joy of knowing you can do what others can or won't and the independce that brings.

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customerjon @gmail.com is where information happens.

I thought I knew. But I now realize that I know very little about myself. Needless to say, all this non-training time is letting me figure out a few things:

- Having grown up poor, and I mean dirt poor, I will *never* let my family want for any of life's necessities. Period. I will never let myself get to a position where I have to live that life again (motivation & drive). I have had to work tooth and nail for everything I have.

- Having been horribly hurt by people I love, I find it incredibly difficult to let people "in". I have seen myself make choices that allow me to survive the emotional battlefields, but often at a very high cost. This is difficult to live with. However, it is a factor that motivates me in my life, albeit not in a terribly positive way - it is purely a survival mechanism.

- Sustenance is a hard one. I get a lot of it from hubby, K, some aspects from friends, some from work. But I know that I am lacking in this area - I don't know what I need to be completely sustained, to be completed. One day I will figure it out.

AP

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"How bad could it be?" - SimpleS

Most of my days are hectic with work, wife, kids, workouts, etc. I really enjoy the half hour each night when I sit on the couch, put my feet up, drink 2-3 beers and mellow out. That's my daily "oasis."

Beer and chicks

• Finishing a hard workout when I didn't want to start it in the first place
• The smile on my girlfriend's, my friend's and family member's faces
• Love
• Music
• The forest and meandering trails
• The ability to laugh at myself and to be with others who can do the same

My spirit has been crushed to the point where it is fed through a tube.

In reading the second paragraph of your post I am reminded of something written by Viktor Frankl while he suffered in the Nazi concentration camps of WWII.

Frankl was tortured, his family gased to death. He lost everything. At least, there was the appearance that he had. What Frankl came to realize was the axiom that, "Between Stimulus and Response is our Greatest Freedom: Choice."

Frankl came to realize that his circumstances could not influence his inner self; his self-awareness. He clung to the fact and the knowledge that we choose how we feel. Feelings are not imposed on us.

Once you know that you have the power (or at least more ability) to decide how you feel about something, how to consciously choose to respond.

Now, we're all human, and as such certainly susceptible to the frailties of human emotion and "feelings" we make be at a loss to fully understand or explain. So be it.

However, understanding the degree of control we have over our own reactions, while simultaneoulsy accepting the utter lack of control we have over those around us is a huge step toward a less combative, more accepting existence. Once you know you decide how something will make you feel, then you are less fearful and more powerful. People can say and do anything they want to you: You cannot control what they do, but you can control your repsonse to it. And therein lies the key to being happy and feeling accepting and good about your life, experiences and surroundings.

-Sorry for the lecture... :)

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Tom Demerly
The Tri Shop.com

Wow, this thread really has me thinking.

1. Making a positive difference in someone's life at work.

2. Having my 4 yr old son copy eveything I do, the good and the bad.

3. Laughing

4. A good coffee

5. A good nights sleep

6. My mom, still makes me feel good when she says she is proud of me.

7. My wife who everyday suprises me with a hug when I am not expecting one.

8. A bottle of Ravenswood Zinfandel with some crackers, a nice blue cheese and some venison sausage

9. The beautiful memories of my travels of the Pacific Ocean.

10. A great conversation with someone.

11. A summer's night sipping on a drink talking about the past with family and friends.

12. The feeling of sweat pouring out of my body while on a long bike ride.

Yep. I can only control me and how I react to an event, a person, a situation. And yes there are times I have made a conscious choice to act or feel a certain way, and I'm OK with that. The part that's tough for me is the "what completes me" part.

And thanks. ;-)

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"How bad could it be?" - SimpleS

Good thread that I have been thinking about for awhile. So many things keep me going in life. A few:

My girls (accomplished 24 and 26 year old young women) and the good times we have shared. They are pushing me get my old ass back into shape and competing again.

That special thing the SO can do with a little hot water.

The thrill of topping out on a mountain (quickly followed by the realization that you are only half done)

The special moments of leading the life of an "outdoor athlete": a fawn playing in the Lake Michigan surf at dawn/having a Michigan rattlesnake scare the crap out off you on a trail run/ the morning mist rising over a mountain lake/sneaking up on Key deer while kayaking a mangrove island in the Keys/chickadees beside a cross country trail on a cold, crisp morning .

A really good book

Pulling off an audacious bluf in a poker game

A good glass of wine with a good Cuban cigar

Finishing a poem after 3 years of trying to get it just right

The list goes on and on............

now to get my dead ass training again

Family

Accomplishment

The relaxation of the early morning workout

The always present opportunity to meeting great people with a shared passion

Knowing that your effort might yield a longer, healthier life to enjoy family

Less guilt when eating!!!

... and as someone else mentioned good wine and cigars..... priceless



Peace

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"Bros b4 Hos, man" House MD

Team Aquaphor 06-08

Tom, I read that book. Awesome one by the way. I believe it's called "Man's Search for Meaning." Or something along that line. Highly recommeneded reading.