A few things. Less padding is better. I know this sounds counter-intuitive, but more padding means more pressure on your lady bits. It may take some work to find the right saddle for you - everyone is built different.

Two - when you are sitting on the saddle, the only parts that should really be touching the saddle are the sit bones (the bones in your butt). A strong core will go a long way to helping, but basically you want to rotate your pelvis forward while you are on the saddle.