I'm a big fan of sports/athletics for kids as a healthy outlet and activity.

Is that something that would work for her? Meaning it should be something she likes to do, and where she would be on par performance-wise with others. (If not, there could be other negative issues).

Wishing you the best of luck with a difficult situation.

I was a member of the Boy Scouts and they had a co-ed affiliate called Explorers which was for older kids and more oriented around specific interests and careers than the outdoor activities typically associated with the Boy Scouts. I have not been involved with it but have heard good things. Best wishes to her and your family.

https://www.exploring.org/about-us/


Exploring serves two different age groups, both coed. Exploring clubs serve middle schoolers, aged 10 – 14, in sixth through eighth grades. Exploring posts serve older youth 14 – 20 years old. The program model is the same for both age groups – hands-on and interactive character and career activities are facilitated by trained business leaders in your local community.

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The first time man split the atom was when the atom tried to hold Jens Voigt's wheel, but cracked.

I'm sorry your experiencing this. MH issues can be challenging.

My daughter is younger but we've had some success with art therapy and sports.

Sports seems quite hit and miss, the coaches can be transformative but also a nightmare.

Does she have any particular interests

I dont have a specific group to suggest, but in my neck of the wood, 906 adventure team/bike club offers some of this. Non competitive, focus on reslience and encouraging others.
Maybe there is something similar near you?
https://906adventureteam.com/

When I was 15, I came home from school to find my sibling having attempted to OD. Call for help. They had called 911, fortunately, they called back, and arrived to pump stomach, etc. 30 years of therapy, and meds.

Sports maybe... soccer, softball/baseball, volleyball, running, swimming, cycling

I better be careful or I will have to go to the other forum.

Very sorry for her, and her stress. And then for you all, as the stress and anxiousness over this does not abate.

I think the most important thing, whatever avenue, is connection. It doesn't matter what the group or activity, as long as she can find a few people to identify, connect with. Encouragement on good days, and safe healthy validation on bad days.

What does she gravitate to? Anything performance oriented, art, acting, music? From the very little you shared, she sounds expressive, so maybe this outlet helps her do so in safe space and find a personality match.

I commiserate with you. My now adult daughter had significant issues in her late teens. It was extremely stressful and difficult for all of us. We made it through, although not unscathed or unscarred.

We got her into MMA, which was a generally positive experience for her. We live in a very active college town with tons of gyms, youth activities etc. There was a wealth of options and we just had to find the one that resonated with her. It was good for a while and seemed to keep her busy and centered.

It wasn't a cure all, and things went off the rails for a few years after she graduated from high school.

None of her behavior was strictly logical. Even now, a decade plus removed, she can't explain why she did the things she did.

Good luck.

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"In case of flood climb to safety"

Thank you. It's really helpful to know that others have gone through this.

I'm replying to you as the last post, but thanks also to everyone for suggestions.

I think organized sports won't work, but individual ones might. She does ride her bike for around 30 minutes to an hour every day, not training but just to unwind. And we swim at our club for at least 30 minutes two or three times a week. It's a tennis club with an 50 meter pool, but she has no interest in tennis or racquetball or whatever that pickleball thing is. But the individual activities are good for her physical and mental health, but they don't necessarily provide the group community that I think she also really needs, especially since she's out of school for now.

That said, martial arts can provide a sense of community, as you're with peers and work with them. So that's a good idea. Knowing her interests, I think the same can be for art classes.

She has expressed some willingness for religion or at least some church with a youth group. But I know that for it to work with her, it would probably have to be some progressive mainline Protestant church. She's straight, at least as far as we know, but I know she'd be put off by anything socially conservative -- thus why Mormonism is out. (That's not a knock on socially conservative religions -- it's just I know they wouldn't work for her.) I've found a local UCC/Congregationalist congregation nearby that that has a high school age youth group that might work. Religion might not be for her, as my skepticism may have rubbed off. But if she's interested it may be worth a try.

I think I may be just venting.

The UCC youth group that you mention might be good. I like that church. They seem mellow.

Does she sing? I think singing in a youth choir might be a very cool activity. I’ve heard the breathing & posture requirements are good for a person. It seems hard to feel bad when you’re singing your heart out. It’s a community activity— both for practices & concerts. And maybe she could travel with it, a là Up With People.

What are some outdoorsy groups? NOLS? Outward Bound?

I'd second the martial arts and it is far more of a team in environment than would first appear, at least my experience of BJJ has been.

My kids go and we've moved clubs twice for various reasons but where they are now has been excellent for both the coaches and kids who attend. They are super supportive and the kids all work well together. It's been good for my eldest who is ASD - it's ideal in the sense she has to focus, it's complicated and is a combo of thinking, working with others and physically active

It's a balance between learning collaboratively and scrapping.

My youngest also likes stage / dancing / theatre activities which are a combo of individual and group activities. Perhaps that would work.

I’m sorry she is struggling.

I’m a leader of a 4-H club. Does she have any interest in training animals? My daughter is into dog training- but there are clubs for everything from chickens to rifle shooting.

We get a bunch of teens - and watching them grow over the years is amazing. There are a few that have to us in trouble spots that have grown more than I ever imagined.

My kids do a young farmers thing once a week - it has been an excellent experience looking after animals and working with others and there is no competition