Another one, but might me a bit more in the colossally stupid/lucky category. I may have posted this in the Fish thread way back when :

in Summer of 2017 I was training for my first Oly tri. I was working to remove a iron-pipe fence in the back yard, when the angle grinder bound in the pipe. The grinder kicked, and flew up out of my hands and slammed into my face. It felt like I'd been punched in the face with a baseball bat. I said a bunch of cuss words, and grabbed my face where it hurt. When I pulled my hand away, it was rather bloody. At that point, I realized that it was more than just a punch.

The angle grinder had hit me in the bridge of the nose, blade first. It sliced my nose, and bone diagonally from my right nostril to the bridge over my left eye. I had reconstructive surgery the following morning to mush all the playdough back into a nose-like shape. 6 weeks later I managed to do a mile OWS in the Mediterranean off the coast of Tel-Aviv....and, still completed my first Triathlon in September. I had to use a nose clip, the salt water burned my nose on the inside.

I do have several more. At one point our insurance company called my wife to find out if I was suicidal. I have never managed to make it a full decade between Tetanus shots.