so there’s a party going on right now in my frat house. i’ve escaped to my room for fear of making an ass of myself. here’s the situation:
i’m relatively sober, and i’m pretty convinced that a cute young lady is interested in me. very interested. and the feeling is mutual. however, one of my good friends is clearly interested in her, and keeps making moves, which she doesn’t repel. i do, however, get the impression that she is only dancing, hugging, etc with him to make me jealous (because, for example, she keeps looking at me while doing so).
now, this friend of mine rarely finds luck with the ladies, whereas i generally get along just fine. nonetheless, my sex-drive is pretty well ignited by the looks this girl is giving me. is it wrong for me to pursue her?
now, by the time most of you respond to this, or at least by the time i read your responses, it’ll be tomorrow. decisions will have been made, and action will have been taken. i’m just curious to know what you all think of my situation?
Vidaeboa:
So cute…turning to your ST friends for advice.
Okay - here’s Mom’s advice…Is it wrong for you to pursue her? No. She’s not in a steady relationship with your friend or anyone else for that matter, right? You’ll never find out unless you act on your feelings. I hate the “trying to make someone jealous routine” chicks play, something I’ve never understood about my gender. The best way to is to be straight forward, sweet, honest, and yourself. If she’s still interested in playing the field and is just flirting with you to see what kind of a reaction she gets, then she’s immature and not ready for a steady relationship. Perhaps all you’ll get is a one-nighter or perhaps you’ve found a great friend/lover.
The rest of mom’s advice…wear your condom and why aren’t you studying for finals?
Good luck…can’t wait to hear the outcome. Gee, I almost miss the drunken frat parties.
FootballMom 
Dude, here’s the thing to do. Play wingman my friend, and help this dude score any way possible. This will give you great points in the friends department, which will come in very handy, because trust me - some day soon there will be a way hot chick you want to score with, and she is going to have some ugly cock-blocking friend getting in the way. That’s were you buddy can “jump on the grenade” for you and let you into the promised land.
Why do I feel like this is one of those beer commercials with Owen Wilson. “Make the most of the moment” - jackattack.
yes, its morning unless your in cali and the party is still going at 5am…this happened to me in the ol Beta house my friend, I went for the girl, lost the friend. At least the way thingwere I lost him. BUT, If he didint know you saw him dancing with her, thats your chance. AND, you can always act drunk and blame it on the booze!! ( a joke, drink responsibly)
Hmmm, well, best to let your friend have a go in this case. Ultimately, it isn;t up to either of you guys- it is up to her. She’ll sort things out.
In the interim, you will appear (and actually be) quite the gentleman if you conceed to your friend in this case. Later, should you cross paths with the young lady once again (likely you will if she is interested) then you two will prolly hook-up to some degree, and you’re all the bigger man for it.
It’s always best to be the better man. It’s not always possible- but its always best IMO. Good luck- you don’t have any problem attracting fans my friend- you’ll be fine.
I love footballmom, and I am being totally serious.
Please never leave this forum, we really need you here.
man, that’s quite a dilemma. so what happened?!
i guess an update is in order:
i decided to back off and just observe some more. she was spending about as much time flirting with him as with me, and i came to the same conclusions as before - there was a good chance that she was flirting with him to get to me. lots of contact when she was dancing with me, much of it “naughty”. when we had a minute alone, i said “so i guess my friend is digging you. thing is, i am too”. her reply was “are you digging me, or my hips?”, then she laughed and went to the other side of the room.
at this point, i realized that i had ABSOLUTELY nothing to gain from the situation. whatever her intentions were in the long run, she was clearly trying to mess with my mind, and frankly, who needs that? i was tired and sore from my workout and very much in the mood to sleep. so i went to my room and did that.
i do know that she didn’t get with my friend, and since she lives next door, there will definitely be more opportunities for things to happen in the future. for the time being, though, i think i made the right choice.
it seems to me that i followed everyone’s advice, even though i didn’t read it until the morning: i was straightforward i was gentlemanly believe it or not, i was my friend’s wingman, up until that conversation… for example, i kept other guys from hitting on her, and while this may have helped me as much as it did him, it definitely did help him
to answer your questions, footballmom, i would’ve used a condom, and finals were over 2 weeks ago
Ypou’re the king. just like Bond.
I think you did the right thing. Remember “the Tao of Steve”
1.Eliminate desire. Women know when all you want is to get laid.
2.Be excellent in her presence. Whatever you do well, do it in front of her. Just make sure you do it naturally, and make sure you don’t screw it up.
3.Withdraw. If she’s interested, she’ll come to you.
Thanx Tom! That’s a real compliment. Everybody needs “mom” now and then.
Unfortunately it’s going to take the Football Boys another ten years or so to realize that I’m actually smart and not just an overconcerned dork.
Don’t worry, not planning on going anywhere, this forum is too much fun.
Vidaeboa! Mom’s proud of you!
One thing I thought about this morning while swimming…young women realize somewhere between 15 and 25 they have this incredible power. Flirt with your eyes, “accidently” rub your breasts on his arm or chest, wiggle the behind a little, and males suddenly are falling overthemselves to do something for you, espcially when alcohol is a part of the equation. It’s a VERY powerfull feeling and dangerous weapon. Sounds like your female party friend is discovering her woman power and is exploiting it to see how many men she can get to follow her around. Fortunately you’re a very smart young man (with smart ST friends) and you listened to the good voice in your head.
Glad finals are over. What’s up for summer?
That movie was TOO funny! We would watch that after swim practice a few years back! From a girls perspective, it is ineresting to read your comments. I love reading about the male mind… especially about the triathlete male mind:)
Would you like to read my mind? (wink, wink)
Lurkers unite, rule the world
“Flirt with your eyes, “accidently” rub your breasts on his arm or chest, wiggle the behind a little”
if i didn’t know better, i’d swear you were there that night… that was a scarily accurate observation!
i don’t know how smart i am; i think my instincts are good, as are my intentions. as for the smarts, i think those go out the window whenever i see a pretty face. i can’t help it!
to answer your last question, i’m at school for the summer, working in a biomedical engineering lab. it’s a pretty cool project, too, we’re trying to use electrodes implanted into people with spinal chord injuries to stimulate their muscles in such a way that they can use modified squat-racks and stationary bikes.
Benn there. Friends come 1st. Stay out of the way!
“as for the smarts, i think those go out the window whenever i see a pretty face. i can’t help it!”
That’s exactly what I’m talking about! Very powerful weapon if used correctly. Used too much in the wrong situations, she’s labeled a skank. This is why great men like Kobe Bryant are in legal trouble…“Little Elvis” thinks he’s got a chance at some action and logical thinking goes out the window.
While reading that my heart was pounding, I used to know a college aged chick, good as it gets these days.
“jump on the grenade” - heh, too funny…too true sometimes
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Mom, speaking of drunken frat parties, Hairy Legs and I were discussing the logistics of getting an ST quorum together after Keauhou and getting our stories straight! And from the sound of the new run course we will need a lot of cold carbonated beverages to recover… weren’t you working on a Slowtwitch banner to help in the rendezvous at the luau?