Random office place quotes

The Coffee Shop
1

I just heard a doozy, I don’t know the context of the comment, which is why it is so funny to me:

“And so I look at Bob and say, 'Let’s put some bacon and eggs on that and we’re done!” and then everyone nods their head in this eerie way to express both agreement and satisfaction.

I can’t explain it, but these are the people I work with.

2

My fiance does recruiting for a hospital. this is a “resume” that someone sent her.

“I have done one year of answering telphones foe a company call Alliance One. Answering calls taken messing.”