Wow. Sounds like you need address these issues with both soft-tissue work and re-education/strengthening.
On the soft-tissue side, you could do this yourself, but having someone work on you may be more effective (and more $$$). I would find a good ART practitioner or chiropractor (many of them use ART-esque techniques) or massage therapist. Have them loosen up everything that’s tight. It might take a while, but it has to be done.
If you want to do the soft tissue work on your own, I highly recommend a book by Clair Davies…I forget the title right now…something about Self-Massage for Trigger Point Massage. It will help guide you through self-therapy. One issue to note, you cannot fix your QLs and psoas/rectus femoris independently, they must be “fixed” together. Every time you work on one (via massage or stretching), you must work on the other to effectively correct your anterior pelvic tilt.
On the neuromuscular re-education side, I would start with two exercises, box step-ups and belt squats.
Box Step-Ups. Get a box or stack a few “step” bases (used for aerobic step classes) to a height slightly lower than your knee, or about 12-18". Wearing shorts, grab a marker and draw an X on you kneecap. Standing in front of a mirror, without using any additional weight (aside from body weight), slowly step up on the box. The goal is to slowly and very controlledly raise and lower yourself by stepping up on the box with your knee (as visualized by the X on your kneecap) remaining aligned with your foot. If you cannot control your knee from moving around (it should not move at all), lower the height of the box. I’ve had to do these with a mere 6" step up. Trust me, you will progress quickly. Once you can do these unloaded, you can start to hold dumbells to add resistance. Note: the greater the distance between you and the box (i.e., the more directly your foot is under your knee before you start stepping up), the more you will use your glutes (including your gluteus medius, which is probably part of your issues). The shorter that distance (i.e., you farther your knee is jutting out beyond your foot before you start stepping up), the more you will use your quads, which you probably don’t want to be doing here, as it will not help correct your issues.
Belt Squats. Grab a belt…like the belt you would use on your jeans. Wrap it around your thighs just above your knees. Adjust the belt diameter so that your knees are about the width of your hips and that as your press your knees outwards (into the belt), the position of your knees doesn’t change. Now, with your hands on crossed on opposite shoulders, squat as low as you can, while pressing your knees outwards into the belt. Slowly press yourself back up. This should be done slowly and controlledly. Never lift or move with momentum, but rather with control. Start doing this exercise very conservatively. Your glutes will probably be pretty sore after the first couple times you do this.
Just my two cents. PM me if you have question.
Good luck.
They massage the tender areas and teach me stretching techniques. My advice would be to go to your doctor and you should be in good hands; they are the professionals, right?