We’ve talked about these losers before here. They don’t even need to be mentioned because they are such tools, and yet, I have to bring them up again.
I’m talking about people who show up at the pool, get a lane, and then try to race you, after you do your flip turn, in your long set of 200s or 100s or 300s, in the middle of it, or start of it, or whenever. Then, they’ll rest after 25 yards, wait for you to reach them again “to make it an even race,” and blow it out again. Then, of course, they quit after doing 5-6 25 yarders. Hit the whirlpool.
They need to be kicked out of the pool, be given a “back blaster” from a samsonite chair, have their eyeballs scratched out, and be escorted from the swimming pool premises.
I called them “people,” but frankly that’s too gracious. They are more like dumbass pirates and pool fleas. It would be one thing to “tune them out,” but can you really tune these idiots out?
If there is a group of persons or species in swimming pools more low than this, please point them out. I will put into the pot: (1) The senior citizens/aqua exercise issue + (2) Child Pool Toys and Lane Invasions versus (1) dumbass pool racers.
Has anybody just stopped and asked: “what the f&*k are you doing?” Just out and out stopped and confronted them. We need to all get together and come up with a fool proof way to get them out of lanes and over onto the non-laned sides of the pools.
Okay, I’ll admit that I sort of do this. I wait for the other person (usually an elderly woman with terrible form who STILL is kicking my ass) to get about 10-12 yards out from the wall, then I go and see if I can close the gap. Usually I can’t. My goal is to motivate myself and hope that grandma doesn’t notice me tagging along.
At least, I thought she was an old woman. Booth? Was that you?
BTW, I wear jammers and sometimes even a sealmask.
This is just like the heavy breathers who tailgate you for part of your long run, but you don’t know if it’s worth screwing up your workout to drop them. Or the people who sneak up you on a long training ride and suck on your wheel. I think the proper response just depends on what kind of mood you’re in. Either drop them, stop dead in your tracks, or just ignore them. 9 times out of 10 I think you just ignore them.
Yeah, I saw you. I think I introduced myself to you, as “The Vortex.”
I always worry about people swimming next to me, given the massive “storm surge” and resulting bow wave I create against the gutters. People behind me get the “rebound” effect from the bow-wave —> gutter blast, and, like a stunned fish, many behind me just stop right there, and ask: “What was that?”
If you could have just gone a bit faster and reached my draft, all you had to do would be to hang on and ride it out like a surfer.
Perhaps during your next swim workout you might want to build in a few focus drills. You know, pretend you’re it’s a mass swim start. Or pretend you don’t own the pool. Or pretend that’s not a “loser” next to you but just some guy swimming, kind of like what you’re doing. Or are you not just “swimming” but TRAINING. Whattaya think?
Frank
Well, this doesn’t really bother me since I couldn’t swim that fast anyway and most “real swimmers” usually cruise past my training temp anyway. I think it is 'kinda sad though and I do notice it quite a bit.
I do greatly dislike the “water cows” though. I know I shouldn’t, but at my health club there are 2 large pools: the nice, 88 degree warm water pool and the 80 degree lap pool. You guessed it, they suck up 3 lanes of the lap pool to float around with buoyancy belts and moan to music while that lappers have to share lanes. Irritates the He&$ out of me, especially when they just stare at me swimming. One old geezer actually asked me why I swam so long without stopping (and I really didn’t, I was doing 4 x 400s). I told him that I just lost count and asked if he could tell me how many laps that I did
I have a similar pool near my house - I refuse to swim in it anymore. I drive out of my way to the sweet sweet long course pool downtown. It’s worth the drive. Everytime. I sually have a choice of 8 lanes, almost always half to 3/4rs empty. Plus 50m is the only way to go - if you have the option. Also the usual swimmers are pretty blunt about if you need to switch lanes and can’t figure it out yourself.
I still contend that the old people are far worse than this group, but…
Just stop and ask your new buddy, " I see you are a pretty good swimmer by you 25 pace. why don’t you join in with me in this set of X by X. " then wait for their dumb ass reply and laugh.
Be friendly, say “hey come share the lane. The set is 10x400…you can lead.”
The seattle times actually wrote and article called “lane etiquette” about how not to piss off the regulars at the pool. It’s posted at almost every pool now.
When that happens, do a sprint, like you’re trying to get past someone to get the inside line on the buoy. Then, on your next flip turn, slow down for fifty and get ready to smoke him when you get back. It’s a fartlek swim workout.
Better yet, switch to breast or butterfly and smoke 'em with a stroke they don’t even know how to do. I rather enjoy doing a 25 underwater on guys like that. Better yet, put your fins on and do underwater dolphin kick.
