Not the kind in Chicago (though the bastards are probably getting ready to take over that narrow shouldered town). I’m talking about the kind that the hilarious Stephen Colbert is trying to warn us about. The running gag on that show makes me laugh.
But look out! Those damn furry things are"godless killing machines without a soul".
Episode guide here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Colbert_Report_episode_guide
Those damn furry things are"godless killing machines without a soul".
Somebody really should tell that to the protesters who were out the other day in opposition to NJ’s recent bear hunt. One lady there said, “We’re out here to save lives. We can’t stop ant bears from being shot, bur we’re going to try to help any bears we find in the woods that might be wounded,” or something like that.
Lady, that’s a bad idea.
No no no, our gentle friends would NEVER maul you when you are benevolently trying to mend their wounds. NEVER EVER!
And a bear from NJ? That thing would have knife blades and rusty scrap metal mutated onto its paws, Freddy Kruger sytle. And it’d have a really dumb sounding accent, bada bing bada bear.
Lady, that’s a bad idea.
http://snltranscripts.jt.org/90/90abadidea.phtml
Somebody really should tell that to the protesters who were out the other day in opposition to NJ’s recent bear hunt. One lady there said, “We’re out here to save lives. We can’t stop ant bears from being shot, bur we’re going to try to help any bears we find in the woods that might be wounded,” or something like that.
Lady, that’s a bad idea.
How do you tell the difference between a New Jersey Bear and a Vermont Bear?
The New Jersey bear has PETA buttons in it’s poop.
it reminds me of a lady who was trying to protest the running of the bulls several years back. She was in the road trying to stop the people who were going to hurt the poor, defenseless bulls. All the runners got by her, when to her dismay, one of those poor defenseless bulls attacked her. Obviously he did not know that she was a friend. He gored her and she was pretty seriously injured.
I commented that she was suffering from mad cow disease.
Episode 109:
“Shave off your body hair and put on your bike shorts. You just grabbed the yellow jersey in the Tour de Truth.”
Need we say more?