I’ve decided I’m not. I’m not saying I’m always productive, but I always feel like I should be. So even when I’m not actively doing something I’m battling the feeling that I should be.
Anyone else?
I’ve decided I’m not. I’m not saying I’m always productive, but I always feel like I should be. So even when I’m not actively doing something I’m battling the feeling that I should be.
Anyone else?
I’m the same way, especially when I don’t have a long other forum activity to keep me busy on Saturday and Sunday.
I’m not. Unless we are on vacation where it’s warm and we haven’t planned anything, like Florida or the Caribbean. Then I plant myself on the beach all day and read or nap. It amazes my wife how I can’t sit still at home but on vacation I don’t do anything.
I’m great at it.
I’ve decided I’m not. I’m not saying I’m always productive, but I always feel like I should be. So even when I’m not actively doing something I’m battling the feeling that I should be.
Anyone else?
Nope. No desire to be good at doing nothing.
I’ve decided I’m not. I’m not saying I’m always productive, but I always feel like I should be. So even when I’m not actively doing something I’m battling the feeling that I should be.
Anyone else?
Nope. No desire to be good at doing nothing.
I don’t equate relaxing to doing nothing. Relaxing is doing what I want to do, not what I think I should do.
I cringe when I ask a coworker about weekend plans and I get a list of tasks they want to accomplish around the house.
I’m not. Unless we are on vacation where it’s warm and we haven’t planned anything, like Florida or the Caribbean. Then I plant myself on the beach all day and read or nap. It amazes my wife how I can’t sit still at home but on vacation I don’t do anything.
You just described my worst nightmare as a vacation. I’d go bonkers after 2 hours and probably drink myself to sleep.
I’ve decided I’m not. I’m not saying I’m always productive, but I always feel like I should be. So even when I’m not actively doing something I’m battling the feeling that I should be.
Anyone else?
Nope. No desire to be good at doing nothing.
I don’t equate relaxing to doing nothing. Relaxing is doing what I want to do, not what I think I should do.
I cringe when I ask a coworker about weekend plans and I get a list of tasks they want to accomplish around the house.
Welcome to my world.
I grew up on a farm where there was always something that needed done. We grew 2 - 3 acres of strawberries so they always needed weeded. Soybeans weren’t Round Up ready so they needed weeded. The garden needed weeded, The apples needed picked. The lawn needed mowed. The fields needed plowed, disced, planted, the cultivator run through them. Equipment needed maintained. Something always needed painted.
My mom’s favorite saying seemed to be, “if we rest, we rust.”
Since Wednesday I weeded the vegetable garden, weeded the strawberry patch, cleaned up the rose bed, moved new to me antique furniture upstairs, disassembled and reassembled a couch to get it to the lower level, mowed the yard with my neighbor’s mower, worked to find the electrical problem on my mower, cleaned up the blueberry patch and burned some brush, did some work on the travel trailer. Painted the walls in the basement with dry lock and started moving gym equipment to the basement so I can convert that room to a bar/speakeasy.
The weekend before fixed the shower faucets, installed shut off valves on the supply line to the master suite, changed the oil in both vehicles, …
But it is bothering me that I didn’t get the mower fixed and I didn’t get done with the camper. Makes me feel like I should have kept going last night.
Not doing something productive gives me anxiety. So sitting around during the day watching a sporting event or a movie drives me batty. I can’t just sit in my backyard enjoying it, I need to be doing something to it. That isn’t healthy. Don’t teach that to your kids.
No not really.
I grew up on small farm and I always had chores to do from a very young age and usually had an hour + work before catching the school bus and summer time was full time work no summer camp for us.
And being a baby boomer we had no choice and in the long run it is good.
But there can be some underlying issues like some trauma and ptsd which can cause this behavior.
It worked for me in early part of my life and when I went into the Navy it worked.
But it wasn’t until I was a round 60 I noticed I needed to be busy and complete projects,i kept giving myself to do lists and I needed to complete them and if I didn’t it created anxiety and frustration.
I have modified my to do list and it helps but and now I see the origin of my behavior.
Nope and the flaw runs in my family. I have noticed that my mother is the exact same way and I figure that’s where I get it from. I am not certain how much devices and connectivity play into how this flaw has developed in me as with the internet there is always something that can or needs to be “done”
I may start working on improving my ability to relax. It’s been on my mind as I especially noticed it when we took our first family cruise a few weeks back.
Relax what’s that? I fly dangerous airplanes, work a high pressure job where if we fuck up it would be all over international news, and again have signed up to suffer for 140.6 miles? (Yes I know it is self-inflicted.) I try to relax by gardening but even then I rush through it while planning ahead for the next high stakes adventure.
This paragraph hurt my brain, so I added the BOLDED parts to make it make sense.
I grew up on a farm where there was always something that needed **to be **done. We grew 2 - 3 acres of strawberries so they always needed **to be **weeded. Soybeans weren’t Round Up ready so they needed **to be **weeded. The garden needed **to be **weeded, The apples needed to be picked. The lawn needed to be mowed. The fields needed to be plowed, disced, planted, the cultivator run through them. Equipment needed **to be **maintained. Something always needed to be painted.
I don’t equate relaxing to doing nothing. Relaxing is doing what I want to do, not what I think I should do.
I cringe when I ask a coworker about weekend plans and I get a list of tasks they want to accomplish around the house.
… This. Relaxing is a state of mind. Washing the car on the weekend is relaxing to me. Others (many?) would say that’s a PIA chore.
This paragraph hurt my brain, so I added the BOLDED parts to make it make sense.
I grew up on a farm where there was always something that needed **to be **done. We grew 2 - 3 acres of strawberries so they always needed **to be **weeded. Soybeans weren’t Round Up ready so they needed **to be **weeded. The garden needed **to be **weeded, The apples needed to be picked. The lawn needed to be mowed. The fields needed to be plowed, disced, planted, the cultivator run through them. Equipment needed **to be **maintained. Something always needed to be painted.
LOL. To be or not to be. . .
Relax what’s that? I fly dangerous airplanes, work a high pressure job where if we fuck up it would be all over international news, and again have signed up to suffer for 140.6 miles? (Yes I know it is self-inflicted.) I try to relax by gardening but even then I rush through it while planning ahead for the next high stakes adventure.
What do you fly?
And to answer the OP question, I’m awesome at relaxing.
I have never been able to shut off. I have learned to manage it a bit better but it will always be an issue. I feel the most relaxed when I am doing something hard. Fortunately it is helpful professionally and my wife is very understanding because she has the same issue.
This paragraph hurt my brain, so I added the BOLDED parts to make it make sense.
I grew up on a farm where there was always something that needed **to be **done. We grew 2 - 3 acres of strawberries so they always needed **to be **weeded. Soybeans weren’t Round Up ready so they needed **to be **weeded. The garden needed **to be **weeded, The apples needed to be picked. The lawn needed to be mowed. The fields needed to be plowed, disced, planted, the cultivator run through them. Equipment needed **to be **maintained. Something always needed to be painted.
Yeah, well you need to be smacked.
Fuck, another thing added to my list of things that need to be done.
I’ve decided I’m not. I’m not saying I’m always productive, but I always feel like I should be. So even when I’m not actively doing something I’m battling the feeling that I should be.
Anyone else?
I’m pretty terrible at it. After a fair amount of self analysis, I know that comes from my parents / upbringing, and is part of my drive and work ethic. I don’t necessarily want to work as much / hard, but I need to get to the top of whatever particular ladder I’m on more than my colleagues and friends. The down side is also never being able to appreciate an achievement. I think it’s probably quite a common denominator in successful people. I have a best friend who is so laid back, and has seemingly zero ambition. He’s doing okay, makes good money, but has just floated into things. I managed him for a while and tried to promote him, but he didn’t want the extra responsibility that came with it. I envied him a bit, not needing that validation.
This paragraph hurt my brain, so I added the BOLDED parts to make it make sense.
I grew up on a farm where there was always something that needed **to be **done. We grew 2 - 3 acres of strawberries so they always needed **to be **weeded. Soybeans weren’t Round Up ready so they needed **to be **weeded. The garden needed **to be **weeded, The apples needed to be picked. The lawn needed to be mowed. The fields needed to be plowed, disced, planted, the cultivator run through them. Equipment needed **to be **maintained. Something always needed to be painted.
lol glad it wasn’t just me. I scrolled back up to see if it was a bot only to see it was a long time poster’s name.
I’ve decided I’m not. I’m not saying I’m always productive, but I always feel like I should be. So even when I’m not actively doing something I’m battling the feeling that I should be.
Anyone else?
FUNNY YOU SHOULD ASK. I’M RELAXING RIGHT NOW. WHAT’S YOUR PROBLEM WITH RELAXING?