Your corporal punishments as a child

The Coffee Shop
22

Both of my parents were physically abusive. I was a straight A student, full scholarship to private school with a joint focus on academia and sport. National standard youth hockey player and later on X-Country runner.** “Never in trouble, never answered back.” **

My mothers favourite implement was a 2 foot wooden spoon. She broke it after hitting me with it for several years. I frequently went to school covered in bruises. Late 60s early 70s, for some reason it was acceptable.

I’ve got to ask, what in the world was she punishing you for?

My parents hated each other and didn’t care how much the kids got damaged. Only got married because she was pregnant. I was extremely clever at maths just like my father. She said I was too much like him.

23

My dad would say, “go get my belt.” There was no turning back at that point. I don’t remember my mom ever spanking me but one time, I was 15 or 16 and said something and she started to slap me in the face. I caught her hand and stopped her. The look I got was worse than any slap she would have given me and still scares me when I think about it.

Funny story, when we were very little, my brothers shared a room. They were going at it one night and mom went in their room and spanked them. As mom was walking out, my brother said, “that didn’t hurt,” mom went back in and you didn’t hear from him for the rest of the night. He regretted the comment.

24

that’s brutal.

I’m so sorry my OP wasn’t more sensitive to situations like yours which sadly too many experience.

25

more yikes.

my mother once had some unintended consequences with a wooden spoon. There was rowdiness that crossed her wrong in the kitchen and she slammed it on the counter with some force. The top broke off, spun, and hit my brother full in the face.

26

My dad would say, “go get my belt.” There was no turning back at that point. I don’t remember my mom ever spanking me but one time, I was 15 or 16 and said something and she started to slap me in the face. I caught her hand and stopped her. The look I got was worse than any slap she would have given me and still scares me when I think about it.

Funny story, when we were very little, my brothers shared a room. They were going at it one night and mom went in their room and spanked them. As mom was walking out, my brother said, “that didn’t hurt,” mom went back in and you didn’t hear from him for the rest of the night. He regretted the comment.

My mom didn’t have it in her, so her spankings with the wooden spoon and such became a bit of joke when were relatively young. My dad’s beatings basically stopped when I got big enough to stand up to him around age 15 or 16.

27

that’s brutal.

I’m so sorry my OP wasn’t more sensitive to situations like yours which sadly too many experience.

I didn’t read it as being insensitive.

I was over it 40 years ago. I am lucky it that it had no negative impact on my life.

28

that’s brutal.

I’m so sorry my OP wasn’t more sensitive to situations like yours which sadly too many experience.

I didn’t read it as being insensitive.

I was over it 40 years ago. I am lucky it that it had no negative impact on my life.

No negative impact, for god’s sake you’re posting on an obscure portion of a tri forum. That seems like it scarred you. :wink:

29

that’s brutal.

I’m so sorry my OP wasn’t more sensitive to situations like yours which sadly too many experience.

I didn’t read it as being insensitive.

I was over it 40 years ago. I am lucky it that it had no negative impact on my life.

Obviously don’t know you personally but you seem well adjusted. I find it fascinating how some people like you come from homes like that and are relatively no worse for wear while others come out as broken people that can’t be fixed.

My parents are still together and love each other. I can’t imagine how growing up like you did would have affected me.

30

In Catholic Elementary School, 3rd Grade, if I remember correctly, I was assigned a desk which - for some reason - wasn’t lacquered nearly as well as the others in our classroom. Instead of feeling ‘hey! why isn’t my desk as shiny as the rest?’ it occurred to me fairly quickly that the naked wood was a wonderful medium for pencil drawing

Between sessions of school work, I’d find an empty spot and draw little dinosaurs, or submarines, or robots*

“Randy! S*top *drawing on your desk! Clean that off!!!”

I went through quite a few little pink erasers trying to keep my budding talents under wraps

One day, I guess she had enough, and just blew up with fury and violence

While I was doodling mindlessly , she strode powerfully toward me, and quick as a bolt from Heaven, whacked me in the hand with a ruler. This was one of the wooden ones, with the thin metal straight-edge

As you would expect, the ruler snapped, but the metal edge remained in my finger - the middle one, appropriately

It wasn’t long before I was bleeding all over my desk

She ran to the bathroom, grabbed a roll of paper towels and started wrapping them frantically around my hand. Her panic subsided quickly, however, and I was sternly told to get more towels from the boys room, to clean off my desk AND the floor, to go stand in the corner until the bleeding stopped, and then to scrub the desk & floor, again

There were also a few Hail Mary’s and Our Father’s thrown on top of the Hard Labor punishment, but you know you’re in DEEP shit when reciting the 23rd Psalm comes into play** - her way of saying “You’re lucky I didn’t *kill *you”

  • I hadn’t discovered Frazetta yet, so there were no naked women, thank GOD!!!
    ** I was allowed to read from the classroom Psalm Book, as I hadn’t fully memorized it yet
31

Yeah, I got “belted” just once. Probably around age 10 or so. I never forgave my dad for it all the way through adulthood.

It didn’t help that I felt the event was purely accidental for a 10 year-old. I was playing some of his jazz records, and left a few of them on a shelf by a window. Sun was coming through the window and melted the vinyl on a few. I had had no idea that vinyl melted so easily, nor was I warned. And these were not valuable records - just regular jazz standards.

In retrospect I feel bad about my response because my being slightly distant from him for the rest of our lives probably hurt him far, far worse than the one belting hurt me. Not hostile. Always very polite. Just not “friends.”

32

It wasn’t long before I was bleeding all over my desk

She ran to the bathroom, grabbed a roll of paper towels and started wrapping them frantically around my hand. Her panic subsided quickly, however, and I was sternly told to get more towels from the boys room, to clean off my desk AND the floor, to go stand in the corner until the bleeding stopped, and then to scrub the desk & floor, again

“he’ll clot, thanks be to the almighty father”

33

yeah. it’s sad that some of my clearest memories of my mom were her not living up to the (superhuman) standard.

34

Yeah, I got “belted” just once. Probably around age 10 or so. I never forgave my dad for it all the way through adulthood.

It didn’t help that I felt the event was purely accidental for a 10 year-old. I was playing some of his jazz records, and left a few of them on a shelf by a window. Sun was coming through the window and melted the vinyl on a few. I had had no idea that vinyl melted so easily, nor was I warned. And these were not valuable records - just regular jazz standards.

In retrospect I feel bad about my response because my being slightly distant from him for the rest of our lives probably hurt him far, far worse than the one belting hurt me. Not hostile. Always very polite. Just not “friends.”

I thought I was bad about holding a grudge!

Your description of your relationship with your dad sounds a lot like mine. I’ve gotten the impression over the last decade or so that he would like to make amends at some level, or at least have some sort of closer relationship, but who knows.

Probably just take it to our graves as is, which I’m fine with.

35

It wasn’t long before I was bleeding all over my desk

She ran to the bathroom, grabbed a roll of paper towels and started wrapping them frantically around my hand. Her panic subsided quickly, however, and I was sternly told to get more towels from the boys room, to clean off my desk AND the floor, to go stand in the corner until the bleeding stopped, and then to scrub the desk & floor, again

“He’ll clot, thanks be to the Almighty Father”

St. Janarius/San Gennaro
Patronage: blood banks/blood donors; Naples; volcanic eruptions; goldsmiths

36

My dad would say, “go get my belt.”

Never used a belt, only a hand … Until the year we first got Hot Wheels for Xmas

I can* still *hear the high-pitched whistle the section of orange plastic track made as it cut through the air

37

My dad would say, “go get my belt.”

Never used a belt, only a hand … Until the year we first got Hot Wheels for Xmas

I can* still *hear the high-pitched whistle the section of orange plastic track made as it cut through the air

In Puerto Rico where I grew up the weapon of choice was the sandal. My mom was like a martial artist with her sandals. As a matter of fact, Eddie Murphy has a comedy routine where he talks about his mom hitting him with a shoe from a distance like a ninja. I actually experienced that! My mom could hit me from across the room accurately with her sandal, it was actually pretty funny. What wasn’t funny was being hit with the belt. Didn’t happen often but when it did it was awful.

My dad only got physical with me once when I was a teenager and I definitely deserved it. I have mixed feelings about corporal punishments. My mom definitely took it too far, but I believe that helped me understand that some things were not acceptable. I spanked my kids a bit as I raised them but only until they were about 8 years old and only with my hands. After 6 to 8 years old corporal punishment is really just the parent getting angry and it doesn’t really teach kids anything other than bitterness. I’m not sure if I would advocate for corporal punishment but one thing I can tell you is that me and my siblings turned out just fine and my kids are model citizens. That could be in spite of spanking but I definitely feel discipline (with real consequence, physical or otherwise) is necessary to teach kids proper behavior.

38

No, my parents never spanked or hit. I was sent to my room as punishment.

That never worked for me - I was happier there; it’s where my books and paper & pencils and model airplanes and records and my imagination were

So I had to sit at the dining room table; the formal dining room table in the formal dining room, which we* never *used, being far too formal for us four rowdy boys

39

I used to get the wooden spoon from mom and go the belt a time or 2 from my dad. After that all it took was the threat and I would come in line.

I’m a step data and have never laid a hand on either daughter or son. I have raised my voice and scared them but that was years ago when it was appropriate. Daughter is 20 now and son is 17. Daughter all I have to say is I’m disappointed and it’s the end of the world to her and never really have to say anything. Son is a bit of a challenge at teen years and it’s more of removing things now like Xbox time, phone, shooting practice, etc and he gets the message.

I do believe that a good swat when younger is for sure in order and I deserved quite a few. Obviously not an abusive environment and that for sure is an exception but a little negative reinforcement has proven to be effective for hundreds of years. I’m not a fan of time out etc and believe that it’s inception and usage has had a negative impact on our society to a degree. There needs to be repercussions for bad behavior to act as a deterrent against future bad behavior. Ultimately it’s up to the parent to decide what that is and what is effective knowing their children the best.

Not condoning beatings or anything of the sort as that crosses the line and is a failure in parenting.

40

No, my parents never spanked or hit. I was sent to my room as punishment.

That never worked for me - I was happier there; it’s where my books and paper & pencils and model airplanes and records and my imagination were

So I had to sit at the dining room table; the formal dining room table in the formal dining room, which we* never *used, being far too formal for us four rowdy boys

I was happier in my room, too. I think my parents weren’t keen on making me suffer so much as changing the dynamics and helping me reset my behavior. When I was in my room, I loved cutting paper. I would cut and cut. My mom gave me old magazines so I could cut out pictures of stuff. Happy times!

In high school when I was grounded to my parents, I ran errands with them. We also went out to eat and had a lot of fun together. My mom and I ganged up on my dad and punished him in retaliation for when my mom and I were under the tyranny of my brothers and dad. Great memories!

Four rowdy boys sound hard for a mom. I’m glad you sat at that table. She did just fine.

41

I’m Asian, so my parents (mainly my mom) used a cane.

It only touched skin a couple of times, but the threat and sound of it swooshing through the air was deterrence enough.