Following on from tom’s thread do you think there is a possibility you could do this?
If you do, they weren’t that significant.
Edit: Sorry…read this wrong…thought you asked if you’d give up a sig. other for triathlon.
No.
Tri a balancing act of 3 disciplines. So is life, but of far more and significant ones. My wife and daughter have much more import in my life than excercise. IMHO, if you give up your SO for tri, the relationship is suffering already.
A true Sig Other wouldn’t/shouldn’t ask.
If she asked that from me… that would make her my un-significant other…
If I had to, very likely yes, but I might be resentful for a long time. As long as I had an outlet of some sort (i.e.: running or cycling standalone) then I’d be OK with that.
But in general, they shouldn’t ask because most of us if we gave up tri would want to find some other outlet, and it would be a case of trading one for another.
AP
I’m not talking about them asking you to give it up, but if you had to for the sake of your relationship.
The question is, how would one get to this point in a relationship in the first place? Unless you are(1) talking someone who is in a relationship, then takes up tri. I’m thinking (2) someone who is a triathlete and enters into a relationship already as a triathlete. If you are talking the second case, I’m with Paulo.
Okay…so the situation doesn’t involve them asking you to give it up then I would presume that there is some other reason you would do so voluntarily. That person becomes very ill and requires your constant attention or if you’re a parent then a lot of the previously shared duties now fall on you. If this is the case I am afraid it becomes a no brainer. If my wife needed me to give it up to help her out…I’d miss you guys like hell but some things matter more to me. That is one of them.
S.O. was there long before my tri obsession, and will be there should it ever end. My family is my life, triathlon is just a hobby.
Dennis
dennisr has it right. Triathlon is just a hobby, a game. My wife would never ask me to give it up but if it was my wife or triathlon then bye bye triathlon.
Depends. I met my wife while I was taking a hiatus from triathlon and focusing on getting my career kick started. So she really did not get to see the toll that triathlon can have on a relationship. However, she is absolutely supportive of my training as much as 24 hours per week, so long as we do not miss date night. I in turn do not complain about her antiqueing/junking/flea marketing. However, if there was ever any indication of a life altering health issue I would give it up in a second to be by her side.
Frankly…outside of some really otherworldly circumstances…if it comes down to a choice between ANYTHING and a relationship…you have to ask yourself the question whether the relationship is working in the first place…
The answer is NEVER an either/or situation.
Why is it an either/or question?
Dont give up your sport and happiness for another person - ever.
-g
Gee, I wonder why you can’t maintain a relationship.
I have done that… aug 2003… gave up cycling for a long distance relationship. I became so mean and miserable, I signed up for IMLP and that broke us up. I was in hawaii with him working the race and was a “bitch” all week, it was tearing me up inside to watch that when I knew deep down I wanted to be there. That’s when I signed up for placid…He didn’t agree with Ironman, it was going to take too much of his time away… Obviously not the right guy for me. But tell you what, I will NEVER do that again, lesson learned. Actually I think i got traumatized, and now I have no patience with these poor non tri guys I go on dates with.
I can honestly say, that’s a question I almost wouldn’t mind having.
My current question is, would I give up triathlon to get a significant other?
oh man, you nailed it… that was my whole post about “how to fit dating in your training program…” Being single is really not that bad:-)
Probably. Relationships first, obsessions come second. I will think carefully before putting my family through my IM training program again, although lately my wife has grown a bit tired of me slacking off and suggested that a half IM is quite OK.
My brother is a different story. Before I got obsessed with this triathlon think we were into sailing in a big way: we owned a 40’ racing boat together and that took a lot of time: every weekend throughout the summer. He being a ladies man (I’m the family man) there was a familiar pattern to his relationships, from initial excitement through to the coming out for a bit of fun at Cowes week all the way to the “it’s the boat or me” ultimatum. I think the idea was that rather than sailing offshore in the weekends he should go shopping with her or something. He used to bounce this off the crew, seeking their opinion: you can guess what we said, the boat won all the time.
When he met his wife her approach was different. She insisted on coming out on the boat and learning all about it and supporting him in what he was doing. I guess she worked out that it was important for him and if she wanted to make something of it, she needed to be part of it.
Of course, now he’s got three children under four years of age and doesn’t have time for anything at all. The boat’s sold and the house smells of nappies.