It’s time for me to hit the power button and hard re-start this summer. Back in March, I had grand plans and a schedule of tris to do: the 5430 series in Boulder, Xterra Colorado, Ass Over the Pass, Triple Bypass, Leadville, and a few others. To date, I haven’t competed this year. At all. I’m 15 pounds up in weight. I’ve got hair on my legs. And I’m to the point of calling this summer/fall a complete athletic wash and starting over with an eye towards next season.
What happened? Life, I guess. A family member became terminally ill with cancer, and ultimately passed away (just this week). I suffered a ridiculous but debilitating back injury that kept me from working out for nearly the entire month of July. And my marriage is in serious jeopardy of falling apart. Life, you might say, intervened (thanks, IronCLM, for coining that phrase, which to me is so very apropos).
I’ve reached the point of closure with loosing my step-mom (who was married to my dad for 20 years … after he lost his first wife – my mom-- to cancer after 17 years of marriage). My injured back seems to have healed with no lingering affects. My marriage … well, the jury is still out. This summer has made me feel like Job. I’ve come to two opposing conclusions: 1.) triathlon is insignificant in the grand scheme of life and how to live it; and, 2.) triathlon – or, more broadly, physical activity, exercise – is crucial to the process of a balanced life.
I’m so ready for the fall so I can put this summer to rest and begin again. I’m registered for a summer IM next year, so I’ll have the structure of serious training during my re-boot.
I feel your pain, though I haven’t had to deal with anything like the loss you have.
I was on track to go to nationals, and had scheduled a tune-up race in Moses Lake, the only Oly length race I’d done since… July '06. Got married in March. That’s good. Bought a house in May. SHould be good, but strapped me financially. We moved in the same weekend as the Moses Lake race, so I scrubbed that one. Finances said that I couldn’t afford the weekend in Portland, even though I was already registered for it (I signed up the day registration opened). In fact, the only race I’ve done since we moved in was 5-Mile Lake sprint. So a month ago, I strain my PF in my left foot. Thankfully that’s pretty much healed now. But the same day I went in for the initial diagnosis on that, I also visited my doc that’s treating my colitis. It was just a “how’s it going” visit, and to get me on a different taper for the prednisone I’ve been on for what seems a lifetime, but I can’t taper too quickly or I flare up. Well, the VERY next day I start to go into flare, like the power of suggestion or something. And so I get a week and a half of swim concentration, and then the flare gets so bad that I haven’t done a workout at ALL in over a week now. Feel like I’m starting over…
Sad to hear, if things dont go the way they should.
But exercising (not competing) is a habit, that I can’t shut on or off. Even if I had a bad days missing my scheduled training due to long, boring and useless meetings, I will still brush my teeth, eat, drink and run. It might not be a training run, but it is a “habit like brushing my teeth” run, which - even with no training effect - helps me to clear my mind and put things into perspective.
It is not like swimming for me - which is always a kind of artificial exercise - but running (for me) is a habit, that I keep up, even if other things go south, because for my wellbeing it is as important as brushing my teeth.
I’m very sorry to hear about your step-mom and everything else. I was so happy to see last fall go and I can tell you, things will get better. Like adal said, keep up the working out…it really does help.
I so feel for you and know exactly what your going through.
My mom is currently in hospice due to cancer. She has been suffering in Hospice care for nearly 5 months now. The Dr’s and Nurses don’t know how she is going on as she is. She hasn’t eat’n or drank anything in weeks but yet she keeps on. It’s been draining on my family for many months. I skipped IMCDA this year due to this. I havn’t trained much at all this summer. I was able to get an Xterra in about a month ago but blew up and had a dissappointing race. Have only run twice since then.
With all that said, I guess it is a small price to pay for honoring and supporting someone who has done everthing without a blink of the eye for me my whole life. There will be other summers, and many more days for us to train.