Last week my husband placed an order for himself at REI.com. There was a travel pillow on sale he purchased for me as well.
I really loved this. This type of gift is way better then any birthday/christmas present, because it was thoughtful and unexpected.
Sometimes he does this when he is ordering other things, he got me socks once, because he loved the brand, he wanted me to try them.
I also love it that he keeps all of my bikes in great shape. when he upgrades components on his he upgrades mine as well.
I however, have no idea if I do anything that my husband appreciates.
my husband is “service” oriented. so he likes it when i do extra things around the house, or rub his feet, or do a chore that we’ve both put off (like scrub the bathtub), or cook a special meal. he appreciates the effort and this makes him “feel loved” or appreciated.
the good thing is that it doesn’t cost much, the bad thing is that i work my ass off. LOL (just kidding…sort of.
for me i like to spend quality time together. so i like it when we go to a movie, go to the bookstore, or go out to eat, even run errands together. time away from the house and our businesses, specifically. doesn’t have to be any big whoop, but i just like to go do things together and hang out. so many times we are busy going our own ways…so i wouldn’t really like it if he sent me off to the spa for the day, as an example. i’d rather just hang out with him and go to the bookstore, if he wanted to do something special with/for me.
so think about what your wife’s “love language” is, and that will be helpful to you.
and BTW, if you haven’t read it already, there is a book about the 5 love languages. this is a good concept to be familiar with, IMO.
According to the book, the languages are: gifts; acts of service; quality time; words of affirmation; physical touch. if you know the other person’s love language, the rest is easy.
As some other have said, i like to make sure her bike is always in good working order and clean. I try to upgrade some parts occassionally. Instead of buying flowers I like to buy a potted plant every once in awhile. It lasts a lot longer, usually cheaper, and they can look nicer.
I read somewhere that the people who do big wedding proposals (skywriting, sports events, ect) have a higher divorce rate. It said something on the lines that the expectations that are set forth with the extravagant proposal cause problems, because the guys do not live up to them.
Give her a “night off”, by solely cooking, doing the dishes, taking care of the kids, baths, put the kids to bed. We usually split it up, but I know she appreciates it when I do it all and let her just relax and play with the kids.
Do the laundry … especially the kids laundry.
My wife prefers “date nights”, where I arrange the babysitter, and have the night prepared.
The “purchases” don’t mean so much as the action, at least to my bride. Don’t get me wrong, my wife like most women always enjoy new jewelry, but it doesn’t mean as much as what I’ve typed above. She scrapbooks, so anything from the sentimental area, she’s already covered in that respect.
My wife appreciates it when I take care of the kids (without complaint) so she can go to all day scrapbook parties, maybe once every 2-4 weeks.
I also will take my wife’s vehicle and fill it up with gas, vaccuum it, wash it, etc.
I will say that surprise flowers (for no holiday reason) at work (i.e., in front of the other women) are always appreciated.
I think that falls in line with the idea that some people put more thought/effort into the ceremony/event, than they do into the actual marriage.
It’s an easy slope to slip on.
Our challenge is remembering that we are lovers, and not just get into the daily routine of being “co-parents”. Date nights, especially those completely arranged by me, are among the most appreciated. It’s not so much appreciated when I think we should have a date night, and then expect her to cal the babysitter, get everything ready, etc … in short, it’s more work for her than just a regular night.
The simple things along the lines of “not putting me first” are the most appreciated.
I just gave my girlfriend who is thinking about doing tri’s this season (she’s a runner) a certificate for a triathlon/duathlon race entry fee. She loved it. Frame a picture of you two so she can keep it at her desk at work, something simple.
We’re talking about a woman, right? This is easy. Since all women are Spawn of the Devil, and feed primarily on the souls and sorrow of their prey, here’s a list of some nice little gifts for “her”:
Buy a set of small decorative bottles. Spend a month or so filling them with your tears. One should have tears from pain (cut yourself, stub your toe, etc). One should have tears of sadness (think of a dead pet or something). One should have tears of fear,…you get the idea. She’ll appreciate the thought, the variety, and the healing taste of your emotional pain.
Go to the store, buy glue, construction paper, glitter, etc. Cut a large piece of red paper into a folding heart shape. Decorate as desired. Extract your own physical heart, place it inside the folding heart “card,” and present it to her. Preferably with steak sauce.
Use the Microsoft Word template wizard to draw up a nice gift certificate. Fill it out for something she would value: your insignificant human soul.
Buy her something shiny. Really anything will do. This is their greatest weakness. Start off with paperclips or something cheap. You don’t want to go overboard right off the bat.
I’m celebrating my 25th wedding anniversary tonite. Hey I’m not sure what you do to make this special. We got married young, I laugh when I see these people talking about separate accounts, shoot we had no money to argue about. Made it easy.
Everyone is different, my wife never had any jewelry growing up, so I’ve given her a lot. In the last few years though, we haven’t focused that much on stuff. I gave her all I thought her fantasies were. Beach house, big rings, no need to work, etc. I am assuming it went ok.
We’ll see, as in we decided not to celebrate the event on the actual date. Keeping the love alive:-)
One year I surprised my wife with 20 dozen roses on Feb 15th and joked I wouldn’t have to do it again for a long time. I got some strange looks carrying the bouquet home on the bus. She laughed and figured out exact what I was up to.
( She used to do dry flower arranging and the day after Valentine’s Day the flowers were almost free. It gave her lots of stock to work with)
Tonight is my husband’s game night with his friends. He’s usually out until after I go to sleep so I don’t see him until tomorrow. Tonight he called me just because. He wanted to see how my day went and to just touch base. Whenever one of us leaves work or wherever we happen to be we call the other and see if anything needs to be done on the way home. Pick up something at the grocery store, dog food, whatever. It is little but we we don’t do the call I feel like something is missing from the day.
It is the little stuff. Calling just to day you love her and see if she needs anything at the store. Simple but thoughtful.
The wife and I like to do little things that make you feel like they are thinking of you. We will do things like she will hide candy/gum with small notes all over the house so that while she is away on a trip I will find one, like under the 2 pairs of underwear in the drawer so I will see it on the 2nd day, or when I hid some pink running socks in the pocket of her running jacket, or dark chocolate squares in her purse or coat pockets so she will have something for the metro ride in to work.(I hear women like dark chocolate) I also do a gift of massage lotion and coupons good for a massage, that is a true winner for both of us.
