“Gone”, today’s editorial is up now at www.bikesportmichigan.com:
http://www.bikesportmichigan.com/editorials/0000073.shtml
This is the one Ian King, a Senior and National Honor Society member as well as an Eagle Scout and other assorted honors, edited for me.
Ian’s contribution made the piece more orderly, concise and readable. Let me know what you think.
Tom.
Well, then you both missed the fact that Mary could not really sit on a “thrown” as a princess.
Were you a prince last summer?
Damn.
Actually, as luck would have it, there are enormous punctuation errors in this piece. Everything was perfect (or as close to perfect as I could get it) until I e-mailed the word file over to IBS, our website administrators. When the Word file was copied the punctuation such as italicized book titles, etc., did not come through- so the thing is up right now with some errors. Oops.
I already sent Kim at IBS an e-mail asking her to fix it, but she is leaving for Hawaii tomorrow for Christmas so I would imagine she is pretty rushed.
Oh, I should have mentioned. The girl in photo in the ocean is Mary Fera, the girl mentioned in the editorial. I took that photo this summer at Punta Cana, Domincan Republic at Mary’s birthday party.
Nice editorial, Tom. I, too, am back in the town where I grew up and as I walk/drive around I think about the places I spent my childhood… These great bike trails in wooded area by my house-condos are going up at this moment. The little corner store my brother and I would ride to and spend our money on candy cigarettes (bet they don’t make those anymore!). I wouldn’t classify myself as nostalgic, but that editorial brought back a lot of memories. Thanks!
great piece, tom. when i was in 7th grade (i think) i bought herschel walker’s basic training book from the local book store and it got me hooked on exercise. 20 years later, into triathlon. i have no idea whether that store is still there or not, but next time i’m home visiting mom, i’m going to check. thanks again. justin
Thanks. I enjoyed working with Ian and Mary writing this.
Tom, Wonderful piece. It got to me and I don’t know quite why. Books have always been my way of “escaping” and while I never had a particular place to go or be, I can definetly relate. It made me think about the things I had read and done as a child. I remembered reading Swiss Family Robinson, finishing it, turning it over, and starting it again. Thanks for the memories.
And I think there is something about starting a sentence with “And” that is a no-no. But (and I think there is somethng about not starting them with “But”, also) if the intention was to retain the homey quality of your editorials, I think this does it. I wouldn’t want it completely polished–it would lose the gritty yet sophisticated quality usually reflected in your editorials.
Hey Monk,
I just PM’d you.
Yeah, Ian mentioned that. I do it for effect, but have been told many times it is a no- no. I though Ian dialed most of that out of this one. Was there still some of it in there?
wonderful essay, Tom. You got a whole novel into it…
Thanks Tom, this is a fantastic article.
Sure, I think that technically starting a sentence with “And” is improper, but, from what I can tell, you aren’t going for proper, you were trying to tell a story, which you did quite gracefully.
i am a lawyer and have learned that the best briefs are those that tell a story. And telling the best story sometimes requires the “rules” of grammar and punctuation to be broken. Sometimes sentences should start with “And” and sometimes contractions should be used. These things help the story flow and that, to me, is the most important thing.
Again, great article.
Very nice piece. I grew up in a rural setting. My “store” was the small lake I had the good fortune to grow up at. It is now almost totally developed and the huge ski boats the new residents are using have just ripped it up. Gone is the crystal clear water every day of the year. Gone are the huge areas of bluegill beds where I learned how to use a fly rod. Gone too are the fallen down trees the turtles would crowd on summer days. The body of water remains…but it is so different.
Sure you need an editor? I think there is a lot to be said for using good 'ole American talk when it fits and creates the picture. Writing which is grammatically correct is not always the strongest.
Great story Tom! Your writing always makes me visualize things…a mark of good writing I think.
Mike
Tom, nice piece. During my short stay in October I visited the Little Professor on a number of visit and came away with a purchase every time. What is it about us fat kids and books? I guess it is the ability to become whoever and whatever we wish.
I’m sure you are unaware that T E Lawrence is a Dorset man, iving some 12 miles from my current home. We often ride past his old home on the edge of Wareham Forest. The reason for this strange item being included is that (to my knowledge) T E Lawrence was never afforded a Knighthood. Therefore, as would be the case for Jack Ryan (is that the correct name for Clancy’s hero?) he is not entitled to be called Sir.
Tom, some decades hence (many decades, I hope) your store must close, too, and when it does I’m sure there are many people in Dearborn who will have feelings similar to those you have today for Mr. Fera’s store. You have contributed something to your community and I’m sure there have been kids inspired by the establishment you have created.
Really moving story Tom. You manage to capture what that place meant to you in a very meaningful way. A simple, nice, unaffected article, and a great pleasure to read.
Thank you Sir.
By the way, the girl in the ocean is Mary Fera (from the story) at her birthday party at the Punta Cana Resort in the Dominican Republic last summer.
Tom,
I really loved this piece, as I am still fairly young I do not know how many “store” will affect me in the long run but your article sure made me look foward to my future and reminded me to look back at some happy times in my past.
Dan
Tom, How can you compare anyone you like to Paris Hilton?