Anybody watch “The Sopranos” last night? I was intrigued by the actions of Tony’s cousin Tony (part placed by Steve Buscemi). Just when his dreams were about to come true, he beats the crap out of his business partner and goes back to a life of crime.
Has anyone ever done that (snatched defeat from the jaws of victory) in a job, relationship, training? I know I have. Why do we do it? Is it because we are afraid of living up to the expectations of others? Is it because our own poor mental self-image doesn’t allow us to become what we are really capable of? Or, is it because that when we get close to getting what we thought we wanted, we realize it isn’t what we wanted after all?
Its called sabotage and my wife can tell you all about it. It gets down to the fact that one believes they don’t really deserve something. . .so. . .sabotage.
Yes–exactly! Is your wife a psychologist?
Took a seminar one time in which the speaker talked about there being two types of fear: 1) fear of failure and 2) fear of success.
People who have a fear of success will often sabatoge themselves usually due to feelings of not really deserving the success or fear of coming out of a comfort zone that they have been living in and having fear of moving on from there. This type of human behaviour is not that uncommon. It was quite an interesting seminar from what I remember.
yes, but do those who sabatoge themselves do so by beating the crap out of someone trying to help them? Off topic, do any of you watch “Deadwood” afterwards?
Sabotage for me was drinking and other misc illicit activites. It was a built in excuse for subprime athletic performance.That way it really wasn’t me not succeeding b/c I was hungover or something.
It’s easier emotionally to fail if it’s not your direct fault. You could always blame it on something else.
A good book to read about this is “No More Mr.Niceguy” by Dr.Robert Glover.