Poll: DNF's? How many?

I have raced over 100 events of all types over the last eight or so years. I have even broken a frame and walked the MF over the finish line (after a nasty crash in a crit) so I could say I did not DNF. But today, I did.

It was frikkin’ cold, 36 F and rainy/sleeting. I was on the last 9 mile loop of an 18 mile bike ride. I picked the wrong equipment (deep front, disc rear- it did not appear to be windy when I was getting the bike ready), as evidenced by my front wheel starting to drift when I got into the tuck. It was raining so much that my rain jacket was soaked. But where I lost it was when I could feel water going into my cycle shoe. My toes were already close to being numb, but I started to feel the uber cold going up my ankle and into my leg. The course volunteers saw I was struggling (as I looked fatigued) and motioned me into the car.

I did not feel quite as bad, as the local hero whom had raced four (forgot to say “Hawaii”) Hawaii Ironmans was warming up in the car. I still felt like a schmuck.

Who has war stories to tell?

It happened to me last year. I trained all year for my first Ironman, I was in great shape and DNF’ed. Many that I trained with and always beat finished. I have dealt with this all year, it just eats at me, I have no idea what happened.

Oh yes–

IM Cal 2000: DNF, throwing up on the bike, ended up in the medical tent around mile 93 on the backside of the bike course. Great care by the Marines.

Full Vineman 2000: DNF, heat stress. 97F and nearly half the field was DNF. Medical was really, really busy that day and night, including a couple of hospital transports.

IM NZ 2002: DNF, injury. Tripped and fell while running 4 days before the race and wrenched my back. Did the swim and one lap of the bike on race day, but had severe back pains, so called it a day. Way too early in the season to screw the rest of the year up.

Ultramax 2002: DNF, throwing up on the bike (did I mention I have nutrition problems?). Ended up in the medical tent (again).

IM NZ 2003: DNS. Never made it to the starting line due to (1) some tumors which led to surgery a month ago and (2) auto accident in early February–dizziness and neck/back pains which led to no swim/bike/run for nearly 2 weeks. At least I had a fun trip to NZ not racing, instead spectating. And, had to drop out of 1/2 Cal and WF LC. First race will probably be UVAS in mid-May.

Already signed up for IM NZ 2004. We’ll see what happens. ha

So far I’m at 0 for my DNF count. I’ve been racing tris since 1990 and have done 2 ironman races (hopefully a third this year if I can get a spot at Muskoka!) and running races for 12 years prior to that. The closest that I came was a marathon in 1998 where my quads cramped so badly that I couldn’t run and had to hobble the last 7 or 8 k to avoid spasms. Very humbling. The other close call was a bike crash just before transition about 6 years ago that messed up my ribs so breathing was painful on the run. When I was a track runner I saw too many guys DNF when they weren’t racing well and it became a habit for them. I know that for some really long races/injuries it is the smart thing to do but I just can’t bring myself to do it and hopefully won’t be forced to any time soon. How about that guy who did the ride at IM Australia with no shoes… bet he felt like doing a DNF a few times during the day.

LA Tri, 2001. Got absolutely drilled by a big wave while trying to get through the surf line, lost my goggles (yes they were on under the cap) and I was out. I wear contacts, and I needed my goggles as I couldn’t swim for 1500 meters with my head up. I crawled back up onto the starting beach, announced my intention to withdraw to the volunteer, put a shirt over my numbers and rode the course, then handed in my chip at the finish line and cheered my friends in. It bothered me at first but two days later September 11th happened, which put my triathlon problems into perspective. The following weekend I did Pacific Grove, thereby getting back on the horse quickly.

And, because this story may elicit a response from some who (rightly) feel that you shouldn’t enter a triathlon without the necessary skills, I freely admit I had not adequately prepared myself for what was my first ocean swim triathlon and I did not know how to get through a surf line. I used the day as a learning experience, although my neck and back hurt for a long time after that drilling!

When I changed from running to tri/du back in the early 80’s I adopted a personal No DNF rule. DNF’s had been a bugaboo of mine when I was running seriously in High School - dropping out of some key championship races while in contention, then having to deal with the “what ifs” afterwards. I didn’t want to have to deal with that anymore

Remarkably, I was able to stick to the No DNF rule for many years. There were a couple. A jammed rear deraillieur that I could not fix and a very sore calf in a low key race with a big “A” race coming up in a few weeks. Otherwise, I was remarkably lucky finishing 9 IM races twice that many 1/2 Ironman race and countless shorter races and many running races over the course of 20 years.

        Fredericia, 2001, Long Distace World Champs;  Did Not Start, broke my arm in a fall on my last long training day before my taper. 

        2003, Columbia Tri, Blackwater/Eagleman Tri, Will Not Start, My job has been kicking my ass since mid february, all the while I'm trying to train and solve this shoulder problem I'm having.  Went out to run Sunday and couldn't pick up my feet.  Cancelled the afternoon swim workout, decided to take a week of athletic rest(no workouts, still work like a dog) and withdraw from my first two major races of the year.  I still have hopes that work will let up in a month of two and I will have a good second half of the year.

Bunster: Time for a reality check my friend- I hope you get this. I have made a personal career out of f#$%king up the biggest adventure races in the world: Eco-Challenge and Raid Gauloises. Those two events were vitally important to me for a long list of deeply personal reasons. If I coulf have finished Raid Gauloises I would see myself as a different person. It bothers me deeply every time I think of it. But I did what I could and for every “failure” like The Raid or Eco Challenge I have a long list of good races in really tough conditions. Those make me feel good. Bunnyman- the stuff we do is hard: Really hard. Not just anyone can go out there and do it. Hell, sometimes WE can’t even get out there and do it. Sometimes you just get spanked. but let me ask you- isn’t that the point? If it was easy- would it be as valuable? I don’t know dude, this is a glass half empty, half full situation. But as I see it, you have a chance to make Lemonade out of Lemons here: The next race you just take it cool. Just cruise through it easy. When you cross the finish line you will be The Man again. You will have overcome. Teddy Roosevelt say it better than me, and yes, this is 100% from memory:

“The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena. Whose face is marred by dust, and sweat and blood. Who knows the great devotions, the great enthusiams- and spends himslef in a worthy cause. Who , at best, knows the triumph of high Acehivement, and, at worst , if he fials, at least fails while daring greatly SO THAT HIS PLACE SHALL NEVER BE WITH THOSE COLD AND TIMID SOULS WHO KNOW NEITHER VICTORY NOR DEFEAT”. Those, my friend, are words to live by. How do you choose to remember this when you die? What will you do with this expereince? Will it make you stronger? Better? Wiser? Here’s another pearl of genius from Stephen Covey: “Between Stimulus and Response is our greatest Freedom: Choice.” You will decide how this thing works on you. It is inanimate- it can exert no effect on you unless you allow it. You can use this to make you better, stronger, wiser and more peaceful. Will it always piss you off? probably- as a matter of fact, I hope so. Will it make you a more resolved person and athlete? I don’t know- the choice is yours. And finally, this line from the movie “Gladiator” that pretty much says it all:

Maximus to his lieutenant:
“Doesn’t an Army know when it has been conquered?”
The lieutnant to Maximus:
“Would you Maximus? Would I?..”

And from former President Richard Millhouse Nixon:

“You have not failed until you have given up.”

Don’t beat yourself up too much, B-man. It happens to everyone at some point. Its why we do what we do. If you are like most guys I know, your sporting life is about finding and pushing your personal limits. If you work hard enough you are going to find them and cross them some day. Sounds like this wasn’t even an “A” race for you. No sweat. You’ll be better prepared the next time you meet the situation. And you’ll likely be able to push through. Some don’t have the misfortune of having it happen in a race. My personal DNF had nothing to do with triathlon, but hit me hard nonetheless. Until I realized it was just “good training”