“In hack” is an “informal” punishment meted out by a ship’s commanding officer to an Officer or Chief Petty Officer. It means keep your ass on the ship until the CO thinks you’ve learned your lesson (or in my case some twenty odd years ago, until I qualified on submarines). It’s no fun but it beats the hell out of going to Court Martial or Captain’s Mast (another fun Navy seagoing tradition).
You know why you watch Top Gun? Cause you never know where it will be useful to know a line from the movie. This is a “no shit” story. The dude from the carrier, Maverick’s boss (I think it was the CAG) lives in Lake Placid. In ‘99 while I was trying run the marathon at IMNA, I was running up the…scratch that, I was walking up the hill along the river going back towards the ski jumps and there on the side of the road, standing with his dog was the guy from Top Gun (and Back to the Future, I think) He says “how are you doing?” I say “my ego wrote a check that my body can’t cash.” He laughs his ass off and then slaps me five. That’s why you watch Top Gun, because if you don’t then “you will be flying a cargo plane full of rubber dog shit out of Hong Kong.” (He cruised around town in Kelly McGillis’ car from the movie. Sort of a trip back to the 80’s to see)
I tried the “see if this counter can handle both our body weights” years ago, but I crashed and burned.
Nice story, though. I’m surprised you could think on your feet while so exhausted.
I have to admit that I cheated a little bit. I saw the guy in McGillis’ car a few days before the race, and said at dinner that night “I saw this guy today who looked amazingly like the bald dude from Top Gun and he was driving a car that looked alot like the one from the movie too.” The owner of the house we stayed at informed me then that he was in fact “that guy” and I therefore had 3 or so days to think of something to say. I was going to say something about the need for speed or something stupid like that, but at the moment of truth, the check thing just seemed to fit.
Now you’ve ruined the mojo of your story! Still, a good comment.
A buddy of mine was a waiter for Billy Joel and Christie Brinkley once, and he (on the cuff) came up with “A bottle of white, a bottle of red?”
Now you’ve ruined the mojo of your story!
JM, word of advice:
Never let the facts get in the way of a good story.
This is right in line with some questions that we have come up with on 5+ hour training rides…
So…here I am with a few buddies, and these are educated men mind you (I do NOT put myself into that category). We are riding back home from Lake Geneva Wi on a 100+ degree day…when one of them (CEO of the regions largest health system mind you) informs the crew that “Mr. Happy is dead”…so this rapidly goes down hill and my question (JUST a question as I am not that flexible)…
*“If you give yourself head…is that gay?” *- My answer is yes…far as I can see, if you are a man - and ever have a dick in your mouth - you are gay…even if it is your own dick. And if you could and you swallow…you are super duper flaming nasty gay - Maplethorpe gay.
Wow - does this ever belong on the Seinfeld thread…
Should I put it there?
Now I know why Tom doesn’t watch movies or TV (other than documentaries). He clearly has no capacity for appreciating good acting. 
Denise is definitely easy to look at, but wow! What a horrible actress! You’d think she could only get better after “Starship Troopers” (I can’t believe I paid to see that movie), but she really hasn’t.
It wouldn’t do amy harm, would it? Anything to keep it going…
*“If you give yourself head…is that gay?” *- My answer is yes…far as I can see, if you are a man - and ever have a dick in your mouth - you are gay…even if it is your own dick. And if you could and you swallow…you are super duper flaming nasty gay - Maplethorpe gay.
Wasn’t this a scene in “Clerks???”
Dante Hicks: Embolism in a pool, what an embarrassing way to die.
Randal Graves: That’s nothing compared to how my cousin Walter died.
Dante Hicks: How did he go?
Randal Graves: He broke his neck.
Dante Hicks: You call that embarrassing?
Randal Graves: He broke his neck while trying to suck his own dick!
Have I said I love IMDB?!!!