OT: popping the question

Triathlon Forum
1

Reporting in from the UK - London to be exact.

I flew over from New Hampshire last week for a vacation to visit family and friends (to paraphrase Sam Malone “I love beer, and beer loves me”)…

…and to see my girlfriends parents. After a certain amount of sweating and going over my lines I am pleased to report that they are aware and happy of what I am about to do. My question is however how do I make it memorable? I don’t want it to be a story we tell at the end of dinner to make people laugh, I want it to be a good start to the greatest thing in my life. I know it’s not the be-all and end-all, but I do want it to be a good thing for us. She knows it is going to happen, so I need inspiration.

Anyone got any good stories about how you did it? Suggestions? Do’s and don’t’s? Any females with ideas about what you want and don’t want please chime in too. Is it too cheesy to propose in the middle of a half marathon we are running together?

Thanks in advance, and sorry if I don’t get back for a few days. My travels continue - I am going up to Edinburgh to reacquaint myself with some good Scottish beer and maybe swim in a 50 m pool - my first time as a born again swimmer.

Nick

3

I once had a wonderful girlfriend named Susan. She was an absolute beauty and had (and still has) the disposition of an angel. -Best girlfriend I ever had the pleasure of dating. We were together for five years.

I asked her to marry me on the exact spot I first saw her. It was absolute, 100% love at first sight for both of us, and our relationship was very, very good pretty much the entire time. In five years I remember two little spats, both of them funny now. She was 17 when I met her (I was 33)and wearing little schoolgirl shoes. That was it.

When I asked her to marry me I took her to the coffee shop where we had met, which was now a nice Italian restaurant. Incredibly, the exact spot she was standing when I first met her had a little flowered tile. We had dinner there and she had no idea I was going to do this. I gave her a big 'ol ring from Tiffany’s and she was crying and carrying on- quite a scene.

We were engaged for a few months when I relaized marrying someone 16 years my junior and only 23 years old was not a good idea for either of us. We wnet our seperate ways and she has since met and married a fine man named Kyle Johnson.

The two of them just closed on a new house today, I spoke with her on the phone ten minutes ago- she was so excited. I still see Susan about every two weeks and we are very close.

Even though she and I didn’t wind up together as a married couple, which is good in the long run, we are still so close in our hearts and souls. It is so nice to see that she has found a fine husband, is happy and that she and I are still close.

One of those rare happy endings in life.

4 
        Don't pay any attention to Mr Tibbs.  He's F**ked up   Sorry Tibbs I'm only kidding.      Now you have a chance to do something romantic and memorable, I wouldn't do it in the middle of the race, all sweaty and out of breath.  Find somewhere relaxing and romantic and just ask her.       Here's how it went for me; I met my wife in 2000 when she was getting ready for Kona.  The next year we were both on Team USA heading for Fredicia for Long Course Worlds when Bam! down I went while running my last long workout before the race and broke my arm in two places.  I was supposed to meet her in Manhatten that afternoon and it was murder getting in touch with her, getting to the hospital, driving my stick shift truck with a broken arm.  I just said that's it I'm moving to NY and asking Michelle to marry me.  So we cancelled Fredericia (she's a great sport) and went to California for vacation.  I just had to find the right time to pop the question.  Well, one afternoon in Monteray we were watching the seals play in the harbor and I asked her.  It was great and we both will always remember that afternoon.  Make it nice, you'll always be glad you did.
5

female perspective here… know the person you’re asking and tailor it to the both of you. Does she like surprises? or more “planned”? etc. honestly, the pressure on you guys to come up with something creative must be unbearable… I echo the last writer and Tom, make it nice and special to the both of you. The way my husband asked me was probably nothing that would capture any one else’s heart, but it was so right for our relationship that it made it that much more special.

6

One thing for sure, it has to be memorable. This is the biggest decision of your life, and the happiest, so some planning and thought will go a long way.

Also, one word: Tiffany’s. Absolute best ever. Sure, it’s expensive, but when she sees that little green box she will know in an instant. Also, she will be able to gloat to all her girlfriends, a key factor.

Oh, I forgot, congratulations my friend. And my very best wishes.

8

OK, I’m usually a lurker, but this is just one post that I have to contribute to.

I’m less than 2 months away from celebrating my first anniversary, so all of this is very recent for me. So I may get a bit wordy… apologies.

My story starts with me telling her on new year’s that “this is the year, we’re gonna get engaged” We had been dating for almost 5 years, and we both knew it was going to happen, it was inevitable. Fast forward about 8 months to mid-summer. Harbor Lights, just north of Chicago, my first Tri, her second, and I knew that my proposal had to be public, and memorable. So I contacted Capri Events, and asked “Can you do me a favor?” they said sure. It was a tough race on her, she crashed on the bike crossing a slippery Railroad junction. I saw her going out on the run as I was coming back on mine, and I knew she was in a bad mood… “uh-oh, do I scrap my plans? she looks like she wants to crawl away and die.” was going through my head… but no, I had to go on, Her family and friends were all there, and so were mine, I wasn’t gonna waste this opportunity. So I told her “keep it up! you can do it!” as we passed. It was late in the race-day when she finally crossed, and i met up with her, and prodded… let’s just go to the post race-party, i’m kinda hungry. she hated me. she had just had the worst race of her (short) career, and she just wanted to go home. So we gathered the collected family (who, to their credit, were good sports about everything, since I had only told them what was happening about an hour prior), and we sat down in front of the post-party stage, where they were reading off the results. After about 5 minutes or so, they had announced that there was one last raffle prize to give away, and it was going to the person who’s number was closest to… mine. Up I go, and collect the rigged raffle prize (a beach towel for 2, Thanks Capri! you’re the best!) and they hand me a mic asking me, “is there anyone you’d want to share this with?” Of course, She was still oblivious to what was about to happen, and blinded with jealousy that not only had I had a good race, but the good fortune of winning a raffle prize too! I call her up there, and get down on one knee, and propose to her infront of the collected audience, our families and the mayor of Waukeegan.

It took her almost 2 hours to compose herself enough to say yes.

Ok, she was composed after about 15 minutes, but she didn’t remember that she didn’t say yes for about 2 hours, OK?

I sure that I’ll never forget that day, and neither will she. We even got recognized at the race the following year as the couple that got engaged. (we had just gotten back from our honeymoon at the time)

And now, for so long as it is running, and I am able, I will race Harbor Lights, because it holds a special place for me.

Andy

9

"Anyone got any good stories about how you did it? "

She asked me. I was speechless in a temporary shock but before I had a chance to respond she ran upstairs and told her mother that it was a done deal. Her mother came running downstairs, gave me a hug, called me “son” and told me she’d start the wedding plans immediately. I hadn’t even answered the question. True story.

10

I told my girlfried to meet me at the Japanese Bookstore in Rockefeller Center.

One of her friends worked near there so I had her “run into her” She told her that I was waiting for her around the corner in front of the ice rink…

Well she came around the corner and saw me with flowers waiting for her with the ring. Once she said yes she saw the flashes from several cameras from our friends some of whom I had flown in taking pictures.

We then went to a party where a bigger group of friends were waiting for us.

I have had many people ask me what I would have done if she said no? I reply… Uhhh if I thought she was going to say no I don’t think I would have asked in the first place…

Good Luck…

My advice choose some place that you can revisit. Restauraunts come and go but buildings, parks, etc tend to stay put

11

I knew I was going to ask my wife to marry me sometime during our vacation through the West in the summer of 1994. I carried a ring in my pocket for a week before the right time. We decided to stop for a few days at a friend’s house in Boulder, CO and go backpacking into the Indian Peaks National Forest. We came to a fork in the trail where our friend said we could go one more mile to one place or three more miles to DIAMOND Lake. Score!!! I packed a fantastic 1991 Zinfandel and adged cheddar and Bleu Chesse for the trip even. Our friends packed too light and the cold was too much for them the first night. We all decided to depart the following day. I took her friend aside and told her if I stalled for time that she should keep going and we would catch up. At the tip of the lake I asked if she wanted to take her jacket off because it was warming up. She agreed and took off her pack. While she was taking the sweater over her head I bent down on one knee. When she saw me I asked her if she would like to take a drop of Diamond Lake home with her forever and presented her with a teardrop ring I designed myself. She was blubbering for a few minutes beefroe she said yes finally. We’ve been together through a lot in 9 years, but I wouldn’t change a thing!

Cheers & Good Luck,

Karma

12

Go classic. A quite spot, one knee, and ask her to marry you. Whatever you do, DO NOT involve a scoreboard, a sporting event, and keep triathlon out of it.

Oh, yea, have some class and ask her father for permission first.

13

Fly to Paris and pop the question at the top of the Eifel tower?

14

Does this have anything to do with with why you get so bummed over your divorce?

Sorry if that hits too close to home. I just couldn’t resist.

15

Take her some landmark in London and ask her there. Just be sure you are no where near her parents at the time.

16

We were moving from Atlanta to Rochester, NY last year and were in seperate cars. Me in the moving van with my dog and my girlfriend in our SUV with two cats. We were 10hrs into the drive when I called her on her cell phone and told her to look in the glove box, where I had planted the ring. She opened it and was like, “what, what what is this?” I timed it so we were near an exit and I told her to get off and I proposed on the NJ turnpike at about 11pm with another 4 hrs to go in the drive. In case it wasn’t clear, she said yes.

17

“I wouldn’t do it in the middle of the race, all sweaty and out of breath.”

When I proposed to my wife (of 25 years), I was all sweaty and out of breath, but it wasn’t in the middle of a race. ;^P

18

Just did this not too long ago, actually. :slight_smile: I was all sneaky and had it planned out. I mailed her an envelope containing about a dozen smaller, numbered envelopes, one of which was labeled, “Open now!” The note in each envelope led her from point to point on a short roadtrip to a bed & breakfast which we had visited almost exactly a year earlier. When she walked in the door (a bit later than expected, which was kind of freaking me out), I had three dozen roses and a weekend of pampering and relaxation waiting for her.
Just after suppertime and after a relaxing dip in the hot tub, we were lying on the bed trying to decide what to do and I just couldn’t hold it in anymore (I had planned on actually waiting a day). I hopped off the bed and went over to my bag and returned palming something in my hand (she still swears she thought I was going to get a deck of cards). I knelt down kind of leaning over the foot of the bed and popped the question. Luckily, she slapped her hand over her mouth before she finished her initial reaction: “What the f…?!” Even more luckily, she said yes! She’s not always fond of surprises, but she really liked this one. :slight_smile:

19

"Does this have anything to do with with why you get so bummed over your divorce? "

To tell the truth the divorce was ten years ago and as civil as they get. There were no third parties involved, we just decided that we didn’t want to be together any more. We had already tried counselling. We sat down beforehand and decided how to split everything up and what the arrangement with the kids would be. Then we went to a lawyer and asked him to write up the agreement. The total bill for the divorce about $1500. The lawyer told us that if all divorcing couples were as rational as we were there would be a lot of lawyers declaring bancruptcy.

The irony is that it was the ex who wanted the divorce and I wanted to keep it together. A year later she wanted to get back together, but by that time I was enjoying my new freedom and didn’t want to.

20

Be ready to improvise, I was going to pop the question on top of the mountain at Big Sky ski resort but there wasn’t a lodge on top of the mountain. I thought, at least I was hoping, that she might get a little excited so that ruled out the chair lift and the lodge at the bottom just didn’t strike me as the right place. We had plans to snowmobile in Yellowstone the next day so I thought Old Faithful. When we got to Old Faithful the next day it was packed, the parking lot looked like a mall at Christmas time only with snowmobiles instead of cars. That was out. We stopped at scenic spots all along the way and I wound up popping the question at Midway Geyser Basin. She screamed and almost backed into the geyser. That was 10 years ago in January and we will celebrate 10 years of marriage in October. Good Luck!

21

First, best of luck with your plans and future together.

No specific suggestions, really depends on what both of you are like. I’m more of a “just the two of you” person then at a ballpark or whatever.

My story:

We drove to Vermont in October (from NY), to look at the leaves. The day was overcast with some rain, and the trees were 70 or 80 percent bare. Oh well. We drove up a road towards the top of Okemo Mountain. When we got to the end of the road, I suggested we go for a walk up a small path. I let out a big sigh. She asked what was wrong…I said I was nervous…she asked why…I said “Because of what I’m about to do…”, then I got down on one knee and asked. She said yes, we drove back and had dinner, then went and told our parents.

Keep us updated as to how it goes.

22

I have a great wife and great marriage . Always wished I had done better on the asking!