Just two weeks to go, an achilles tendon hurting like hell, the perfect time to think about your race strategy. After a short look at my training log since october - it didn’t take long, wasn’t so much training logged for me - I came up with something almost perfect.
First of all I need a sign for the swimstart with “Hit me, Kick me, Bite me” written on it. Especially if you are a good looking single girl I really don’t mind if you bite me, but don’t be too harsh. Many will probably think “if he wants it, he gets it”, so I have to start swimming from the front row as fast as I can, so that I’m completely exhausted after 1km and just wait to get beaten up all the time to move forward. That should help me survive the swim.
On the bike (if you see me with my bike, it’s like a ferrari body with an lame ass Daihatsu engine - it’s all about looking good, not being good) I will go the first 5 miles as hard as I can so that the people who had no chance to kick me during the swim won’t be able to do that on the bike. The next 7 miles I will settle for a modest pace and try to enjoy my race. After the first 12 miles the pain in my tendon will be back and my struggle to survive will begin. So if you’re going to take over someone with a nice zipp disc, don’t be to proud of yourself, it was just me. After a nice relaxing bike ride (I just hope I don’t get a flat tire or I will need a lot of time the fix it) I hope to hobble of my bike and begin with the greatest fun of it all, the run.
A friend of mine told me that he would kneel down in front of me, if I run the first 21km in under 1:30, so that’s what I’m trying to do. The time goal will likely go past more sooner than later, but who cares. Afterwards I still can try to crawl all the way to the finish line.
So, who wants to bet against me that I won’t place top 25 in my age group. I guess no Kona slot this year for me :-((
And yeah, don’t wait at the finish line for me, I could take ages to get there.