Earlier this morning Mr. Tibbs was fond on his bathroom pants around his needs holding his wrist and begging for mercy. Next to him was the latest issue of Outside magazine. It was open to page 118 where a picture of a Cervelo P3 with Spineregy wheels was observed.
When asked what happened Mr. Tibbs explained, “I was reading the magazine when I saw the picture of the P3 and the bishop polishing began.”
The injury was caused when Mr. Tibbs applied too much torque to the dolphin…
Ladies and gentlemen we interrupt this post to bring you breaking news. The Slowtwitch forum has lost control do to this gross post. Mr. Tibbs has been accused crossing the line both in taste and humor not only was it tasteless it was also humorless.
We turn to Amy for up to date coverage from the Slowtwitch street.
Thank you David I am here with TriBryGuy. Tri you have in the past claimed to be bored with Mr. Tibbs for a long time what does this new post make you think?
“Well I think it’s par for the course. He is just looking for attention and I guess he is getting it. If you will excuse me I have some Marines to train.”
Thank you for your service TriBriGuy we all thank you for it. We attempted to get word from Gerard the designed and builder of the P3 mentioned in the post but he has locked himself in his bomb shelter and released the following statement.
“Keep that freak away from me! Dear God can someone please lock him up? The whole idea of one of my bikes and that grossness is enough to make a man go mad. Tell him I am armed and I will hurt him. Badly.”
We also went to the house of Jaylew. Jaylew how do you feel about the post?
“Look that cracker can post whatever he wants. It was annoying and thoughtless but I need to go.” Jaylew explained as he called the butler to show me to the gate. As we walked away I heard him exhale shake his head and say, “White people.”
This is David I have to interrupt Amy with some late breaking news. Slow twitch stock has fallen to an all time low. After reading Mw. Tibb’s post investors are selling stock at a frightening pace we now go to Stan who is with Slowman for his opinion.
“Slowman how do you feel about this latest development?”
“You know I had a chance to dump this guy but I kept him on thinking that he could improve. Now my Porsche has been sold.”
“So you will knock him off the board?”
“No Stan. I am going to gut him with a bagel knife.”
“Thank you Slowman.”
“Your dead Tibbs.”
“Thank you again Slowman. David as you can tell Slowman is very upset. His once high stock numbers are now as low as the ratings for Evening shade. Back to you David.”
Thank you Stan. Not all news is bad for Mr. Tibbs a small group of supporters are preparing to give Tibbs any help he needs. With me now is hid. Tell me hid why are you here?
“Tibb’s is the man. All he did was write a story about patting the little man in the boat and bam they go after him.”
Standing next to him is Triplthreat who is holding a sign that says ‘Mr. Tibbs needs a hug.’ Triplethreat are you offering Mr. Tibbs a hug?
“Uh hell no. Human contact is gross. I thought someone else could do the hug. I was just recommending it.”
I am getting word of a further development with this thread. It seems that Mr. Tibbs is going to stop writing it do to the fact it just isn’t funny as he thought it would be. This is David saying thank you and goodnig…
