Form http://suicidegirls.com/news/culture/2165/
Imagine you have dreams of making it in basketball. Every game you say, “Coach, let me in to play. I can do this.” You practice outside of normal practice. Posters of NBA all-stars line your room. Daydreaming of going to Duke or Youngstown to play ball is common. You see life as a series of free-throw lines. You walk in stride, timing an imaginary basketball bouncing as you walk from place to place. The coach never really lets you play as much as you’d like, but you get some game in and it’s a rush when you see your opponents and your teammates hustle back and forth. The sound of squeaking sneakers puts you at ease. For you, whistles stop time. At the end of the season, the coach singles you out and tells you that you are getting a special award and to be prompt at the festivities. Your thirteen-year-old-mind is spinning with esteem. At the pizza parlor, or school gym, your coach hands out awards to the other players: most rebounds, highest average score, best defender. Finally, in front of your classmates and parents, this happens: A coach told the crowd that the boy was being honored because “he begged to get in the game, and all he did was whine.” The trophy consisted of a silver figure of a baby atop a pedestal engraved with the boy’s name, which was spelled incorrectly. Family members said the teen - an honor roll student - was so embarrassed that he stayed home from school on the following Monday.I received about four requests and write-ups for this story…people seem to really be affected by this kid’s plight and I wanted to wait till after the school board met this evening to relay the entire story. All this kid wanted to do was play ball, but somehow we can almost see the results of this one asshole coach’s remarks and gestures. The kid no longer loves the game, or every time he plays it, all he can see is the embarrassment reflected in the eyes of his peers. As for the head coach? “The Pleasantville Board of Education voted Tuesday night to fire Pleasantville Middle School coach James Guillen.” It’s up to the courts now to decide whether or not the board has the right to fire Gullen, but I don’t think he can coach basketball anytime soon. As for the kid?“He doesn’t even want to play outside (now),” The boy’s father,Terrence Philo Sr., told The Press of Atlantic City newspaper, adding that while his son may be short, he never backs down from a challenge. "I just keep telling him to stay on track. I keep him active. I just keep telling him, ‘You’re a good kid. Don’t back down.’
Unbelieveable. What a way to turn kids off to sports. My kids were on a soccer team (one of many.) After losing the last game of the season the coach and assistant dressed down all of the players. they were so disappointed in the season, etc. Many of those kids never played again. GREAT!!!wHAT DID THAT ACCOMPLISH?
Makes me want to cry. I spend all my time with my martial arts students trying to come up with new ways to build their self esteem, and the public school system hires guys who will pull crap like that. For crying out loud it was middle school ball, not the NBA. Winning at that level is a pleasent thing but not particulary important to the students development. Of course anyone who would do that could care less about a students personal development. That want to win, so the washed up has been, can have another moment of glory, “I coach the winning team”. i’m disgusted.
having been a middle school coach for many years, I think without a doubt he can be fired from his coaching position. maybe not so easily from his teaching position though. But as a coach, someone as insensitive as that should not be allowed to ever coach youth sports again.
It does remind me of a situation that I was part of as a kid though, one that still sticks with me even now 30 years later. I was playing youth soccer and our season was on the line, coming down to a final penalty kick for each team to decide which team went on to the playofs and which team was done for the season. We had a kid in goal that was not that good, but had heart and tried. We also had a kid that was a superstar wherever you put him. He was a great goalie, but also scored most of our goals so he played on the field. When it came down to this final penalty shot, we thought the obvious choice was to switch goalkeepers and put our superstar in for the shot, but the coach went with the kid that played goal all season long, knowing full well he probably wouldn’t stop the shot. He didn’t stop the shot and our season was finished, but the charactor of that coach stayed with me forever, more so later than it did at the time. Those are the kind of coaches that are great, not the kind described in the above example.
I’m sure the coach thought the kid was an annoying little shit. That’s still no reason to ridicule a 13-yr old kid in front of all his team-mates. That’s not what coaching is about.
I have had several annoying little sh#ts in my classes. Two of them are now a couple of my best black belts. One of the others is a decent blackbelt and still an annoying little sh#t. Win some, lose some. Point is, at the middle school level, you are developing what that child will become. Yeah it’s great to get the kids in there that you really don’t have to coach “just give joey the ball, he’ll score” might win you games but at what cost to the rest of the team who just wants to find out if they can even play the game. My point is everyone deserves a chance, and no child deserves what happened to that boy.
I coach high school soccer, freshmen mostly. After the tryouts, practice, and first couple of games, a few girls asked me why I never yelled. I asked why they thought I was different. They said their last coach used to scream, yell, break sunlasses, throw stuff, cuss, get generally pissed, and thrown out of games. This guy was coaching 8th grade girls’ in a CHURCH league.
I told them I know how to motivate people other ways besides yelling and demeaning them. Example : Today we were down 1-0 at half to a team that was 3-11, we’re 8-5-3. Instead of blowing up and acting like an ass, I let them sit to themselves in the shade for all but 1 minute of halftime. They knew I was upset, but instead I told them we would score and not to get frustrated with themselves and each other b/c the goal WILL come. Have fun, relax, and just play the game. We won 2-1.
I showed them I was confident in their ability as their coach, and that I thought we would win. Yelling and being a dick doesn’t make kids want to play for you, or want to win. I’ve coached college men and the same is true.
Some parents’ see my lack of “noise” to be a symbol I don’t care, but it’s the exact opposite. I care alot, and more about their mental state than the final score. You can be a winner and not necessarily win. My coaches cannot separate themselves from their team’s outcome. It’s a personal thing to them, a dig on their ego.
Greg you are the S*@#! It is team game. If the kid is on the team, going to practice, guarding people, etc. He probably should get a chance to play. It is not life or death. It’s not the NBA. But, that is not the point!!! Humiliating him in front of the awards banquet is completely uncalled for!!! I don’t care how annoying he is!
My god daughter (6 yrs old) plays numerous sports and it is pretty sick how “win” focused they are. After a basketball game one time she told me “we beat the other team by a lot.” I commented that I didn’t think they kept score in her league and she said that she just knew.
It is just a sad commentary on our society that we have this ingrained urge to win. Most of my friends would characterize me as hyper-competitive, but even I can’t see the point of stressing winning over inclusion until varsity level HS sports. Prior to that it should be all about inclusion and teaching life skills like sharing, teamwork, and lifetime fitness.
Perhaps that one kid was an anoying sh!t. So what? As a professional educator that coach should have known 100 better ways to deal with it. Fire his a$$ before he pollutes the minds of any more children.
As the father of an almost 4-year-old who is a timid around other kids (at least at first), this story drives me nuts.
An interesting thing I read about it…the coach who gave the award had received basically the same thing when he was young. Kind of reminds me of the abused becoming the abuser.
Aint it just great here in NJ? One has to hope that this is an isolated incident, the coach apparently is only 24 and maybe moe than just a little bit overeager. I hope he mellows when he gets his next coaching opportunity.
You can read the news feeds for free, but you need to be a paying member to view the photos. I read the news feeds, kind of like reading the articles in Playboy
When I was six years old my soccer coach have me an award (a postive one) and I still have to this day (23 now). So we take a lot of our childhood memories with us into the future, good or bad. Hopefully this kid will pull through this one.
For Fuck’s Sakes Greg you are the biggest asshole ever on SlowTwitch!
It wasn;t the NBA or even NCAA we are talking about a 13 year old boy with dreams and aspirations that are totally destroyed by some asshole coach who shouldn’t even be coaching kids
I thought you were the biggest asshole on the IMC chat page and this time you really have proven it to me and to many others.
Greg - were you the coach in the article? Just wondering.
Come on dude, lighten up. Maybe this kid was a whiner and then again, maybe he was just passionate. Ever watch the movie, “Rudy”? People probably thought he was a whiner too. But Rudy was not a whiner, he was passionate and dedicated and he had to work extra hard to prove to everyone that he could compete with guys easily two or three times his size. He practiced everyday, worked harder than anyone and all that got him was about 2 minutes of play in the final home (blowout) game. But he made a tackle and he was the biggest man on the field in everyone’s eyes.
This ass*ole coach is the type of guy that makes kids like Eric and Dylan who became known as the Columbine killers. They only learn embarrasment and low self-esteem and realize that everyone just see’s them as a joke.
Maybe you’re just trying to get a rise out of the slowtwitch readers (congrats, you succeeded). And maybe you do believe what you write here. If so, that’s sad.
I think it’s a sad commentary on our society that we insist on not keeping score when it is obvious that the kids want to keep score and will do so even if we don’t. As indicated by your god daughter.
Winning and losing is part of life. Being able to handle it is an important skill. How much should a 6 year old know about winning and losing? I’m not sure exactly how much but I suspect that the answer is more than nothing.
It also reinforces the fact that hard work pays off. It’s fun to play sometimes but mostly when it comes down to it; it’s fun to win. Mostly you win by playing better and wroking harder than the other guys. Sometimes you are physically outclassed but in my team sports experience most of the time, playing better than the other team means you win. That connection, hard work pays off later is also a very important one for kids to learn.
